I didn't know Lexi, my aunt, and Mia were at Enzo's doing wedding bullshit. He's a dick for not telling me when he invited me over for a couple brews after we'd finished some work. To keep my sanity I decided to focus my attention on Mia, and not Lexi picking out bridesmaid dresses.
What a sham this all is. It's ridiculous to even put forth such effort.
Mia was more than willing to chat with me at the table while I downed my beer. She's friendly and she'd always said she wanted to be my friend after her and I parted ways. It was me at the time that told her I didn't wanna be friends with her, just after her telling me to fuck off so she could be with another guy.
But that was now 7 or 8 months ago. It's water under the bridge. I'm over it. It was just nice talking with Mia again, because if nothing else, she and I had always gotten along well. So while Lexi was talking about color schemes and venues I was looking away from all that asking Mia questions about what else she's been up to lately.
I thought I felt Lexi's eyes on me at one point or another, but every time I glanced her way she wasn't paying attention at all, so clearly that was my own imagination. "You know what bag came up on my rental app the other day. The same one you bought for me that time. Do you remember the bag?" Mia asked me.
An image of a panicked Mia after someone had stolen her rental purse came to mind. Of course I remember. I said so out loud and she smiled.
"You still use that app, huh?" I know when she was broke she always rented the bags she wanted to own. But she makes enough money now to own them for herself. Mia smiled and it lit her pretty green eyes right up. I didn't mean to linger on them, but I did.
"Yes! Because I switch bags so often I wouldn't have room for anything else if I bought every bag I ever used" she laughed. I like that Mia's kept down to earth even with her rising success.
When Mia's phone rang she excused herself from the table and went into the next room. That gave me a second to glance at Lexi. Only this time she was looking back. I don't know why that made me stiffen my spine, but I just wasn't expecting those pretty blue eyes on me. I desperately wanted to know what she was thinking.
My aunt was looking down at the wedding magazine flipping each page slowly as her eyes scanned each one. Enzo had left the room. Mia had left the room. So our eyes lingered. When I couldn't help myself from glancing down at Lexi's ring finger she followed my eyes and quickly slid her hand off the table. Like she didn't want me looking at it.
For one more split second our eyes came back to each other, and then Enzo's voice cut through the room, almost making me jolt like I'd been caught eyeing his girl or something.
"Got 'em. I forgot I stored the other beers in the garage fridge to make room for Daisy's snack packs" he handed me an iced cold bottle. I twisted the cap and took a long sip. Lexi eyed my Adam's apple bobbing with the gulp.
Then it was Mia who entered the room. She came back to her seat beside mine and tucked away her phone. "Everything good?" I asked her. I don't even know why. I wasn't being nosy, I just felt awkward as hell right now with this group of people.
Enzo pulled a chair loudly around the table to sit by Lexi and look at the book his mother kept bitching at him to take a glance at.
"Yeah, fine. That was just Dom saying something came up with work. Riccardo's gonna be the one picking me up for my therapy appointment" she told me so easily. She talked openly about being in therapy. I thought that was cool.
"And how's that going for you? I'm glad you went. I really am" I told her. She smiled and it does still slay me. She's a beautiful girl. That's just a fact. "I'm trying a new form of therapy, actually. It's more trauma based. It's called EMDR, it stands for eye movement desensitization and reprocessing," she told me.
"What's eye movement got to do with it?" I was genuinely curious. Instead of hearing Mia's low sweet voice I heard Lexi's naturally sexy but somewhat flat tone.
"Oh, I've heard about that. The patient briefly focuses on a trauma memory while simultaneously experiencing bilateral stimulation" she spoke as smooth as silk. Like that was common knowledge. "Yes! Exactly" Mia nodded along.
I had no idea what the fuck they were talking about, so Mia explained it further. It sounds crazy, but it's extensively researched I guess. Eye movement helps you reprocess something so harsh and deep seeded in your brain it's still a part of your brain function no matter how many years past.
I always felt like Mia's past was very much a presence in her present. I don't know much about her back story, but I do know about some of Elio's, so I can guess.
"Well, if you need a ride I can take you no problem" I offered Mia after the fact. She waved me off. "Riccardo will be here any minute," she told me. I felt Lexi's eyes slide my way. Does it bother her? My talking to Mia? Does she sense our shared history?
I never came right out and told her about the 'girl' who I stupidly crushed on and got left for another dude. Still I feel something in the air between us.
"Zia, how'd you get here?" I asked my aunt so I could focus on anything else. "I've got my car, bambino." The only person left to offer was Lexi. And I did. "I'm heading out soon if you need a ride" I finally looked at her head on for the first time in an hour. I noticed she glanced at Enzo. I forgot he knew about us. Would he read into the gesture?
"Actually, I could use the ride. Thanks" Lexi responded casually. What was that flip in my gut I just experienced there?
-
As soon as we got into the car the vibe shifted. Where we were strained and uncomfortable in that crowded kitchen, here we were alone and less second guessing of our every move. "How are you?" I stupidly asked as I turned the car on. I just didn't want silence between us. "You've been avoiding me" she got straight to it. I sighed.
"I'm not avoiding you. We just haven't really had a reason to be around each other, Lex." I was avoiding her though. She was right, but I wouldn't admit it. "So much for being friends" she muttered to herself, but I heard it.
"We need to build a friendship more organically in front of everyone, so it doesn't appear odd to those that would suddenly see us all buddy-buddy" I reminded her. She laughed humorlessly.
"How are we gonna do that when you won't even look at me if anyone else is in the room, nevermind talk to me?" she looked out the passenger side window, but I wish she didn't because I wanted to read her.
Without thinking my natural reflex to her obvious frustration was to bring my hand to her thigh and give it a soft rub. That brought her attention away from the window. "Sorry" I sighed, pulling my hand away.
"I never said you couldn't keep it there" she deadpanned. I was conflicted. It doesn't needa be physical. I can spend a little time with her without it being wrong.
"You wanna go grab an ice cream or something?"
-
The ice cream shop has outdoor seating. Lexi and I took a vacant wooden picnic table with benches across either side. She got a soft serve chocolate vanilla swirl with rainbow sprinkles on a cone, I got a cookies and cream scoop in a cup.
"Hey!" I kept quickly pulling my cup away when Lexi would get to her knees on the bench and lean across the table to steal a taste of mine. She'd laugh when she missed and hummed in satisfaction when she didn't.
"Then gimme a taste of yours" I leaned over the table from the opposite side.
Suddenly our faces were a lot closer. Lexi had eaten most of the sprinkles by that point, but she turned the cone so I could have the last bit on the other side. I let my tongue lick over it and sucked the last of the ice cream from over my lips. The air shifted as soon as I eyed Lexi and her eyes were fixed on my mouth.
I took a lick on one side of the ice cream and she took a lick on the other. I could smell her soft scent when the wind blew. I could see the blue of her irises, and how it held other little flecks of blue within the blue. Like tropical oceans, crystal clear at the shore in multi colors.
I could see the chocolate on her lips when we both went in for the cone at the same time. Her hair brushed my forehead.
How the fuck did she make getting an ice cream so sexually tense? I tried for innocence and felt nothing of it. I decided to sit back on my side of the table, which made her get off her knees and sit back on her bum. We stared at one another in silence.
"How long have you been in love with Mia?" She suddenly asked me. I could've choked. My eyes flew wide in total surprise of not only the accusation, but her balls to just come out and ask me. "I'm not in love with Mia" I corrected her quickly.
"But you have feelings for her" she retorted to my correction. I rubbed over my brow. "No. I don't. Just friendly feelings now" I defended myself. Why do I feel defensive?
"Now" Lexi muttered under her breath. I sighed. "Her and I-" I went to say more, but she held her hand up. "I know" she again surprised me. My brows furrowed, and I left the spoon in my now empty cup. I folded my hands in front of me. "How do you know?"
"I just know a lot of things. Remember? You told me that yourself. How I just know everything" she mocked me. "Mia talked to you about it" I came to the logical conclusion. She tisked at me like I was wrong. I tipped my head.
"Well I know you and Dom haven't been chatting it up, so someone had to have told you. And what did they tell you anyways? Everyone's got their version of what they Think went on with us" I made sure to make that damn clear.
Lexi took a bite of her cone and the loud crunk was the only thing between us for a second.
"You told me part of it yourself. How you don't want anything beyond a physical relationship because of a girl who left you for someone else. It wasn't hard coming to that conclusion once I'd heard a few things in other conversations" she played this too damn cool.
I wanna know who the fucks flapping their lips about me. I didn't like it.
"What the hell do you care anyways?" I didn't mean to spat defensively, but I did. Lexi's brows furrowed then smoothed themselves over before she opened her mouth. "You're right. I don't care" she turned flat with me. I grit my teeth. Do I want her to care? Why should I?
"No? You sure about that?" I called her bluff. She stood from the table and so did I.
"Answer me" I called after her. She was heading for the car on the opposite end of the lot. Carelessly over her shoulder she asked me, "Why should I?" I reached out for her arm to slow her down without really thinking about the physical contact of it. It did stop her though.
I didn't know what to say once she actually stopped. She's so damn pretty, and with this tension across her face you'd think it would lessen that fact, but it doesn't.
"You have something to say to me?" She snapped me out of my stupor and called me out for stopping her then never saying anything. I cleared my throat and released her arm. We shared a stare down. It ain't gonna be me flinching away first.
I flexed my hands at my sides and stayed looking. When Lexi eventually decided to just turn back to the car I turned her by the arm again, but this time I didn't just stop there.
I twirled Lexi back around, and wrapped one arm around her, while I found her face with the other. I crashed my lips into hers before she could understand what was even happening. I felt her suck in a breath, but then her fists tightened against my shirt and she leaned into me.
Fuck. We're in the middle of a public parking lot. I know Boris has been called off of Lexi when she's with the Rizzo's, but anyone else could have been watching. I quickly released her and took two steps back. She looked momentarily disoriented.
"What happened?" She asked, thinking something had happened in the heat of the moment.
I swiped my hand down my face and took a good look around me. "I wasn't thinking. Christ, anyone could be watching" I reminded her. "You started it," she scoffed. "I know. I know that, I just lost my head for a minute" I pinched the bridge of my nose and started for the car.
She followed behind me. I could feel her steps become more rapid as she was determined to close the gap between us. She practically shoved me against my own car door.
"If you pursue me and immediately turn guilty, and give me some speech about why we 'can't', one more time I'm gonna clip your balls and beat you with them" she pressed a long elegant finger into my chest. I wasn't sure if I should chuckle or flinch.
"This back and forth I'm doing isn't a game I'm playing, Lex, I swear. It's my internal conflict battling out which sides gonna win me over when I'm trying Not to touch you, talk to you, be around you" I explained.
I wasn't being a prick. I wasn't playing games with her. Or wasn't meaning to have it come off that way, or in any way.
Lexi took a step back and kept her expression blank. I wish she wouldn't. "Get in the car, Rizzo" she rounded the car to her side. I noticed she calls me Rizzo when trying to distance herself from me.
Anthony Rizzo really doesn't like being told what the fuck to do. Fuck this marriage contract. Damn it.
I got in the car and roared out of the parking lot. Lexi wasn't expecting it and grabbed for the handle of the door to steady herself. I cut a corner and went into a side street and then I rolled into an abandoned driveway. I shut off the car.
"What are you-" Lexi didn't get to finish her question. I just grabbed her face and finished that kiss we'd just started. She was the one to pull away abruptly this time. "Seriously?" She doubted me.
"Look around, Lex. No eyes" I pointed out. She turned her head one way then the other, by the time she faced me head on again I was grabbing her and kissing her.
We were grabbing at each other, sucking faces like teenagers. It was all this pent up sexual tension between us that just needed a little release or the build up would blow the top off.
When we were utterly out of breath we had to pull away for a minute. I kept one hand on her hip, and the other I used my thumb to rub her warm cheek. We were both flush. "I really miss your mouth on me. I thoroughly enjoyed getting head" she admitted to me.
It made me groan in the strain of what one head wanted versus the other.
"I thoroughly enjoyed eating your pussy" I countered. We both bit our lips and looked at each other. "Fuck it. Get in the back seat, Lex, and spread your thighs for me, sweetheart" I instructed her on exactly how we'd be doing this. I'll get her off, but that's all. I won't go further.