Chapter Ten: Emotions
I paced back and forth through my room. The imprint is what could save me from heartbreak. But I don't want to get attached.
Getting attached gets people killed. I'm not anyone's dream, so the spirits shouldn't have forced Paul into wanting it.
Friends? But did I want to just be friends? I don't know! My stupid heightened emotions! I've known him for two weeks. Why does thinking of leaving hurt so much then? My head snapped up when the door opened.
"You're going to wear a hole into the floor." Jasper stood in my doorway.
"What are my emotions?" I asked.
"What?" Jasper asked, surprised.
"I mean what are they?" He walked into my room and sat on my bed.
"Distress. Pain. Fear. And caring." I sighed. "This has to do with the wolf." I looked up from the floor.
"Shh!" He chuckled.
"Everyone else is out on a hunt." I nodded. "It's about the grey and brown one."
"Yeah. Have you heard the term imprinting?" I asked.
"The shifters imprint, it's like gravity moves. Like steel cables are tying you to a person. The emotions are very strong. It's hard not to pick up one." Jasper stated.
"Paul, the grey and brown wolf he said I'm...." I trailed off.
"Imprint?" I nodded. "How do you feel about it?"
"I don't know how to feel about it." I sat next to Jasper. "I'm scared, Jazz, what if I let him in."
"Would that be so bad?" I shrugged,
"Whenever I let someone in, they leave me. They leave one way or another. And here he is. He barely knows me, but he's thrown out all the things he knows about vampires and what makes monsters. It's fast. Way too fast to be good, right?" Jasper shook his head.
"That's not something I can decide for you. Artemis, does he make you happy?" Jasper asked.
"Yes." I stated without hesitation surprising even myself.
"Then what's the problem?" He asked.
"The other night when we had the graduation party I was pissed at the world and all I could think of was talking to Paul. And then the next second I'm being dragged to the dance floor. He smiled at me and I swear if I were human my heart would have stopped. I looked into his eyes and I realized I was in too deep. People find a way to leave. They always do." I stated.
"That's not all is it?" I shook my head.
"He knows what to say. And if I let him in. If I give him the power to break me, then he will." I stated.
"This is about Edward." I looked up at Jasper with tears in my eyes.
"I can't go through that again. I can't keep giving people the power to break me, because they always break me. I gave him my everything and he just threw it into the trash. Am I really that easy to let go?" Jasper shook his head pulling me into a tight hug.
"No. You're not easy to let go. You are not easy to forget because you give this bright smile and everyone's worries slide away. You're perfect and Edward wasn't good enough for you. And I don't know about Paul, but if he is good enough for you he'll have to show you." Jasper stated.
"Thank you." He nodded.
"If he hurts you, kill him." I smacked his shoulder and let out a laugh.
"I'll keep that in mind, Cowboy." I stated. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad.
I sighed. I hated the idea of staying but I hated the idea of leaving even more. This wasn't what was supposed to happen. But what was I supposed to do in this situation?
Run? No. Cry? Done that. Kiss Paul? That sounds like a tempt- Stop it! So in frustration I laid my head on Jasper's shoulder.
"When did life get so complicated?" I asked,
"I joined the confederate army. I did it for state pride. I should have just left." I sighed.
"I was taken to a shed where they kept me for days before being turned into a monster." He wrapped his arm around my shoulder.
"Being undead made it complicated." Jasper stated. I nodded.
"That's probably what happened."
I noticed she crys a lot. I'm not gonna change it. But just thought it was funny. I would cry to if I was in her position.
Thx for reading.