I TOOK A LARGE sip of my hot chocolate and licked my lips.
Currently I was situated in the school mess hall with everyone eating dinner. My eyes trained to Liam who sat on the second table right I my view.
I twirled a piece of fettuccine and placed it in my mouth chewing. Even chewing became to tense with the nervousness running through my body.
Aaron and Reuben sat at the far end of my table agreeing to let me talk to Liam. But of course the deal was to have them in sight to if anything goes wrong.
"Can you get me water please? I dropped sauce all over my skirt." Natalie pouted gesturing to the sticky mayonnaise mess.
I got up and nodded pushing away from the bench and going to the wall in front the table where an array of condiments, foods, and drinks lay.
I went to the cooler and picked up a glass before twisting the tab and letting water feel in. Somebody brushed past me making me jump. The water spilled on my shirt making me cuss out loud.
"Sorry." Liam winced getting a paper towel and pressing it to my stomach. I took it from him and tried to soak up as much of the water off as I can. "You let Aaron pick up your calls now?"
I glanced up and tossed the used tissue into the bin. "No. I was tired and he had the phone." I had to lie to get his attention. He was an asset right now. "And I'm just really pissed at nobody telling me anything." I rubbed my face to emphasize my frustration.
He tilted his head curiously. "Tell you what?"
I shook my head backing down. "It doesn't matter. It's stupid and none of my business-"
"What is it?" Liam pressed on taking a step forward with determination in his eyes. He took this as a coin to win me back. Of course only he would. "Tell me."
I sighed pursing my lips. "Everybody knows about the Vipers and yet nobody tells me anything about them. I was the only who nearly got killed in that incident and yet everyone treats me like I'm a baby."
Liam snorted at that. "I told you Aaron would ditch you-"
"I didn't say that." I tightly brisk. "I just mean he says there's nothing important he can tell me."
"You can't expect someone who's in debt to a large society to really know anything. But I on the other hand do know. And most of it is confidential."
I threw my arms up and huffed, "Great. Thanks." I walked away until his arm grabbed the fabric at my waist and pulled me back into him. I stumbled away a little as he looked at me.
"I didn't say I wouldn't tell you. I'm just unsure on whether to trust you or not."
"It would be stupid to trust me." I laugh a little as he shrugs.
"Tell me your question and I'll see."
I pretended to ponder that idea and looked over his shoulder to look like I was deep in though. "Uh how about the- actually does the Vipers even have a leader?" I ask furrowing my eyebrows.
"Yeah." He nods. "They do." Too little information.
"Who?" I press.
Liam sighs and looks at my neck. "There is one but he's on travelling terms right now. Me and a few others are taking care of the trades and deals right now."
"Oh." I formed with my lips. Those were a lot of second in command then. "How do you guys fight for jurisdiction though? I would flip myself if I had to work with that many people." He chuckled rolling his eyes.
"It doesn't really matter. We all have our own shares in things. I just happen to be the owners favorite." He winked at me. My stomach fell. Liam was in charge of the gang?
"You're in charge?" I said astounded. Before he could speak after Harry came into my view.
"Hey Bryce. I was wondering if you have a minute to-" Liam cleared his throat at him making Harry flinch.
"Fuck off." Liam smiled. Harry's eyes worriedly shot to mine before he scurried off.
"That was unnecessary." I told Liam. He only shrugged.
"Back to the point. You could say that. I mean of course it's democratically difficulty with the other shareholders but some of us get extra points." So there were more second in commands after all.
I hummed. "It must be nice being the boss and all. This school pretty much limits that fun."
"Yeah. It is. It's only till the owner comes back anyway. But till then I'm in charge." He confirmed as I smiled just a fraction. I looked to my right to see Aaron looking at us with a gritted jaw. He was holding on to his cutlery so tight I could imagine it flying straight into Liam's chest.
Liam noticed my trace of sight and placed a hand on my hip. I furrowed my eyebrows as he pulled me closer. I tried to push back but his grip was strong as he nuzzled his cold face against my neck. "I would do anything to have you back. Anything to place my lips on your skin. Anything to have you moan my name again while I fuck you senseless." My throat tightened at his words. They disgusted me more then anything. So foreign and cold and dirty. It felt like he was a germ.
Just as he pushed my hair back from my shoulder I stared. "Liam stop. I don't want this. Please stop it." He did not listen. His hand travelled down to my ass squeezing it.
Just right then he was jerked back and into the buffet table next to me. Aaron held his shirt fisted as he pushed him into the table. "I told you I'd fuck your face if you touched her again. She's fucking mine. Get that into your head." Before I could stop him Aaron swung a punch directly into Liam's face earning a snapping sound. He punched him again and again before throwing him on the floor.
People started screaming and crowding us to see what was happening. I saw the wuss girls looked at me. As if I was some slut doing multiple guys at a time and playing them.
I felt my self esteem shrink as I watched Reuben shout at me to get Aaron off.
I walked throw the crowd in front of me and ignored the whispers.
"Such a slut."
"Poor guys playing both of their hearts. I wonder who she's going to bed next."
"You better save your m boyfriend from her."
I got to Aaron and tried to figure out what was the best way to approach him without being flung right out the window.
"You worthless piece of shit." Aaron growled at Liam who snickered.
"She wants me. She wants me between her legs and she wants me to own her. She wants me." Liam said with a psychotic smirk his eyes tracing to mine. "She always runs back to me. And in time she'll beg me to fuck her-"
"Shut up before I rip your tongue out." Aaron punched him again. I swallowed and moved into the scene getting down on my knees next to Aaron.
"Aaron. You need to stop." I said. He shook his head a side discarding my words. "Please. I know what you want me to. Let's go now. Please." His eyes met mine and he could see the tears glittering in them. He pushed off Liam and turned to me.
I gasped as he smashed his lips painfully against mine. I felt his tongue part my mouth as he grabbed the back of my neck and kissed me fiercer. I kissed him just the same with love and passion and fire running between us. Everybody was forgotten as I got lost in him. His touch.
We pulled back both of our lips swollen and red with lust in our eyes.
"Come on." Reuben whispered to us with a small smile. "Let's go." Aaron got up and helped me up. We walked through the crowds ignoring everyone.
"You ugly whore!" Ava shouted at me. I let go of Aaron's hand and shoot my fist to her face watching her stumble down.
This time I broke a nose.
"Get your vocabulary straight bitch. I'm not a prostitute running after money. I've got a whole multi millionaire company backing me up and a lot more things then daddy could ever buy you." I spat at her as she whimpers on the floor. "You want to fucking come at me then at least make yourself worthy of doing so. Slut shaming and every other thing you guys come up with just shows you all are small minded to assume things." I look at Sienna one last time and say, "You really are messed up to assume the girl is always the problem in every situation." I turn around and walk out the room with the air of anger swarming with me.
Fucking bozos.
I went into the elevator and stabbed the floor I needed to be in. Before the silver doors could slide close Aaron walked in and immediately moved to me.
He took my hands in his and stared down and the red marks across my knuckles where as his was bleeding and torn.
"She deserved that so don't tell me she didn't." I whispered between us.
"I won't." He said not looking at me. "Because I would have paid one of the girls to beat her anyway." I let out a snort as he gazed up at me. "Are you alright?"
"I should be asking you that." I say looking at his knuckles. "You fucked bun pretty bad this time."
"I was going for worse." He hummed with a smile. I grinned back and kissed his cheek.
"He would've deserved it. But outside school grounds so you don't get in trouble." I sternly tel him. I did not want to see him expelled. Not when Liam would be holding that reign. Aaron deserves to go to Oxford and pursue his dream. "Especially when he's in charge of the Vipers." Aaron's eyebrows shot up.
"Him?" He said offended. "Really anybody could do it."
I shrugged. "It would seem he's been picked. He wouldn't say who the real leader is though."
"It's alright. We'll get to it."
The door opened and we walked towards our dorm already having it open. I look at the large parchment bags on the kitchen counter in question. "Did Sersha or Madison order food?" I asked checking inside the bag to see two large cheeseburgers, stuffed potatoes and onion rings.
Damn that looked really good. I checked the cardboard holder to see two ice teas as well.
"That... is for us." Aaron said from behind me.
"Us?"
"Mhm. I told you I'd take you on a date but... we are on lockdown and shit." I turned around with a large smile and kissed him. This was not the kiss of proving a point. This was a kiss of showing him just how much he means to me. The statement that lays only between us.
"Thank you. This is perfect already." I preferred eating inside anyway. It was more causal and us.
He helped me unpack the food and place blankets on the floor in front of the couch. I pushed the coffee table back and laid the food on the blanket while Aaron picked a movie series to watch.
"Alright." Aaron announced switching on an avengers series package. Luckily we both loved the marvel cinematic over DC because quite frankly I cannot put up with the fake looking costumes and even more boring story line. I said what I said. "This is the first step to our date night."
"What's the second step?" I asked biting into a crispy onion ring.
His eyes turned to me while the TV light projected on his features producing shadows. "Hour long sex."
"That's ambitious of you to assume." I say leaning against the couch.
"That's what you always say until I have you screaming my name." He hummed as I tossed an onion ring at him. He caught it between his teeth expertly and winked.
Asshole.
...
I quickly went to the bathroom and wobbled back to see Aaron waiting for me. He met me half way and slid a hand under my knees and carried me to the couch. He gently set me down and looked at me like he was planning to memorize my face. As if my face was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"I'm sorry." He mumbled pushing a strand of hair back. I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "I was too rough wasn't I?"
I rolled my eyes with a smile. "You were perfect."
"You're so fragile. Sometimes I think I may break you."
"With sex?" I laughed.
He rolled his eyes now. "With anything." He placed his lips on mine and kissed me softly.
"I'm alright Aaron." I said against his lips. "I'll tell you if it's too much."
"Promise?"
"I promise." I say pulling back. "Soo much for an hour."
He smirked at me. "I could've but I have something else in mind for you too."
I flipped on my stomach and stared at him. He was sitting on the floor next to the couch. "What?"
"I want to take you stargazing. I looked up and tonight they have a meteor shower tonight."
My eyes lit up with excitement. "It's going to be my first."
"I figured. Come on. Let's get cleaned up and changed. I already have everything set up on the roof."
He did not have to tell me twice.
...
We both laid on the roof top looking up at the sky. Turns out we both saw only one fucking shooting star. I did not mind but Aaron looked pissed.
He was excited to see stars. I did not really care much about them but he seemed pretty set on the idea that they were like crystals in the sky.
"I'm suing the weather forecast."
"You'd be suing them a million times over." I laugh. "Most of the they're always wrong."
He turned his head to me and nodded. I had music playing off his Bluetooth speaker which just tied the whole mood together. "Do you have a favorite constellation?"
"I don't know much. Except like the Big Dipper, Orion and... well that's about it." I admitted looking up at the sky. "Do you?"
"That's a tricky one." Aaron twirled a piece of my hair around his finger. "I would say Capricorn."
"A Capricorn? Why? I'd thought you'd choose something a bit more impressive." I teased as he rolled his eyes.
He rested his elbow next to me and looked down. "It is an impressive constellation."
"Why?" I pressed.
"Because it's your sign." He murmured kissing my nose. "At least we know it's brighter then you." I chucked him back making him laugh.
"Hysterical." I sarcastically put out. "And what would your sign be, huh? Sagittarius?"
"Actually I'm a Taurus. Disappointing I know."
"I love it actually. It fits." I straddle him looking down upon his figure. His hands go to the exposed skin at my hips, his fingers skimming my skin.
I have come to know that touch is his love language.
"You know what else fits?" Aaron muses. "You and I. And in more ways then one." I lean down against him and he uses that movement to pull me down fully and place his lips on mine.
I sigh into his mouth as he expertly bites and explores my mouth. "I have something to tell you too." He whispers as I pull back.
"What?" I ask still on him.
His finger traces my collarbone making shiver. "I got my acceptance letter today. To Oxford."
"Aaron that's wonderful." I gush and look down at him. He stares at my lips, cheeks and head but not at my eyes. He seems to be avoiding them. "Why aren't you excited?"
"Because I don't want to go?" He tries. "I don't want to go. For the first time in my life I really feel that dream is starting to become a nightmare."
"But you love Oxford. You said-"
"I know. But- I don't want to leave you." Aaron confesses as I push his hair back. "What am I supposed to do for four years? Sit around with strangers and pretend that I fit in? I don't have anybody there Bryce. I don't have you there." I bit my lip and look down at his charcoal shirt.
I get what he meant. I felt the same way about going to Harvard. How were we going to pursue our relationship? How were we going to be okay? We relied on each other to hold us through the bad time. What were we going to do now?
Aaron seemed to read my mind because he looked up at my eyes with the same broken sadness. His eyes were filled with soo many fragments of shattering that I did not know how to make him happy. "What if- What if I go and I hate it there? What if I..." He swallowed and gripped my hand. "What if I have another attempt?"
My face drops and I hold everything in me trying not to fall undone right here. "Aaron... I don't know. I feel like we rely soo heavily on each other that without the other- it's- this just proves we need to separate. Not forever but just for a little while. So we can both grow and become independent. It's- don't take this the wrong way but- I don't think the other can leave peacefully if we do bad things to ourselves because of separation." I explain in sorrow. This was a hell lot harder then I expected.
"You want to break up?" He says his voice low. I let out a shaky exhale and stare up at the sky.
"I think- I think that's what we need to do. Is we both can go to university and be the people we need to be. And when we both are in good places... then we'll find our way back." I feel my lips wobble as I say every word. I feel him tense under me.
"Fuck." He whispers. "So... right now... what do we do?"
"Well we can make the most of this time." I start gritting my jaw to stop myself from seeping every emotion coursing through me. "And then after graduation we... we... you know."
He nods and sucks in a breath. "We aren't toxic though, right?"
"I don't think so." I furrow my eyebrows. "I think we just need to learn to stand on our own two feet." It was the truth. I had to learn to deal with my shit ask he had to learn to love himself. And we could not rely on each other to do that.
Maturing is knowing what's right and what's wrong. And no matter how painful this was I knew it was the right thing. This could lead to a lot of complications but... I had to hope we would be together. I had to.
Because for me he was where it end. He was my last and nobody would come after him. Ever.
Aaron blinked lost in his own thoughts. A few stretches of silence filled between us before he broke it. "If this is what you need then, okay. As long as you get your dream I'll learn to be okay."
I leaned down and he placed his arms around me tightly. "It's what I need." My tone was low and breaking as I blinked tears onto his shirt. My heart felt like it had a whole in it and it was forming larger at a perpetual process.
In the end this is what we both needed.
...
"Liam?" Reuben muttered in shock. "What the fuck? It doesn't add up. Last time Aaron was in the gang he was a simple delivery guy."
"Yeah well now he's the powerhouse." Aaron mutter throwing a ball up in the air and catching it. "It doesn't give us much leads does it?"
"Not fucking really. No." Reuben muttered rubbing his eyes.
Sersha blew out her lips looking at us. Apparently Reuben had filled her in with information. The rest of the sparrows however were still in the dark. "I have an idea. It's a little messed up but-" She shrugged looking at us all. "Bryce you know how Liam had a mad obsession with you?"
"I'm aware." I slowly say trying to connect the dots.
"Have you ever thought of becoming a seductress?" She piped with an unsure look as my face expression exploded.
I laugh nervously pulling at my skirt. "Yeah um no thanks."
Her green eyes looked at me pleadingly. "If Owen's stabber could be found then this is the only way we can get the information. Think about it. Liam just happens to be the head of the whole thing. He knows everything. He also gave you a valuable amount of words today. If you flash him a little and make him want yo then imagine the amount of words you could make him spill. We could unveil everything." As colourful as she tried to make that sound it only brought unease to myself. I could never touch Liam after today or before. He was not worth me and I certainly would not have him using my body for his pleasure.
Reading the look on my face she nodded. I understand. It's okay.
The boys clearly did not read our looks because they went on.
"No way." Aaron barged the conversation. "She's not going to seduce the guy who wants it."
"Fair point." Reuben pitched in. "Seducing Liam might just get her strapped into the whole show."
"True. It's a stupid idea. Sorry." Sersha mumbled and I wave her off. "Then what do we do?"
"We wait for Owen to wake up." Reuben confidently puts out. "Then we get our intel."
Sersha jumps out of bed at lightning speed. We all look at her alarmed as she slaps her forehead. "Oh my fucking god. I just remembered!" She screamed.
"What?" I breathed getting up. "What is it?"
"Harry." She gasped looking at me and gripping my shoulders. "He wanted to talk to you. He said he knows who the stabber is. He saw the person's features when Owen tried to fight back."
"What was Harry doing with Owen?" I shoot my heart accelerating as Aaron and Reuben got up. Everything suddenly slowed tilted as she spoke.
"I- I don't know. But-"
"Let's fucking go." Aaron interrupts impatiently. We all barge through the door and run down in swift speed.
I sprinted across the hallway and skidded to a right. My whole stance was to get to the stairs when something knocked behind the hallway. I jumped back but no one was there except a painting that had fell.
Weird.
"Bryce come on!" Reuben shouted hurrying me as he waited at the top step. I glanced behind my shoulder one last time and ran with him. We went down the stairs where I see Aaron already leaping down the staircase railing and landing on the top of the next stair platform.
We all stumble to the first floor and run down the hallway towards Harry's room. "His doors open." Sersha yells as we go to it. Aaron ran in first and Sersha followed in swift movements with all of us panting loudly.
Reuben and I enter crashing against each other as I freeze in horror.
Nothing could describe what I felt or saw right now. The coldness running through my veins screamed all through this room.
"Oh my god." Aaron whispers as we all stand there pale faced. I was too scared to make a sound. Too scared to speak up or do anything. Everything was wrong in this moment and I felt like I was witnessing it from afar.
"What the fuck." He muttered rubbing his face in overwhelming shock. I cannot look away from the mess. I cannot un-see it.
Every fibre in my body was as frozen as everything around me. Still and unmoving and utterly weighed down.
"Sersha." Reuben moves to her as I trip back from them ,staring at the mess.
"We got here too late." Aaron murmured in pity and dread. It seemed everything- every clue we got was being processed too late by us. And that cost us greatly.
I should have listened to Harry when I had the chance.
"Because of me." She sniffles. "This is on me. I told you guys too late." She whimpers as Reuben envelopes her into a hug. Aaron moves to me and turns me away from the scene too. He cradles my head as I shake in his embrace not knowing if I was crying or just feeling panic.
Whatever the case the feeling in me was far worse. It was traumatic and haunting and I knew in that moment that I would always live with this image. I would never escape it.
"Don't look." Aaron whispers as I squeeze my eyes shut trying to close off everything.
But even with my eyes closed I cannot shut off the clear picture of Harry's dead body laying on a pool of ruby blood. I cannot remove the image of his eyes staring at me with his mouth parted allowing a river of blood to pour out.