I lingered outside O&J's alone, contemplating if this was a good idea. But I had no other way to start than to get directly under the nose of the operation.
I pushed open the glass door to the shop and was immediately met with an empty area which I wasn't prepared for. I had expected a little crowd.
Nova looked up just as I half turned to walk out the door. I stopped awkwardly, my one foot out and the other inside.
It was too late now. If I turned back he would be suspicious. I entered again and the door automatically shut behind me. I swallowed. He still scared the shit out of me and being alone here with him was a stupid idea, as I then realized.
I walked over to the counter and said, "A strawberry cone, please."
He nodded and set about scooping the ice cream into a cone. After he handed it to me, I sat at the closest table. I dug out my phone and pretended to do something on it. But from the corner of my eye I was following Nova's every movement. He was sat behind the counter and a quick glance his way told me he was just messing with his SGD.
Just as I finished my ice cream ahd was beginning to think that this was all a waste, Nova's chair scraped back and rose up. I tensed up as he pulled up the partition and came on the other side.
I turned my head to look at him approach me directly.
"May I?" He gestured to the chair on the opposite side of the table.
"Uh...okay."
He lowered his massive built onto the tiny chair and he somehow fit and did not break it.
"What's up?" I said for the lack of a better start.
"How's Abeo since that night? Is he doing okay?"
"Yes, he's fine. He doesn't seem to be affected by it really."
"Okay." He paused, not looking like he had anything more to say but seeing my expectant gaze he stuttered to add, "How have you been?"
"Great, thanks. And you?"
"Same. Why are you here?"
Even thought the voice was emitted from the device and had a rather dull tone to it, the words spoken sounded accusing and doubtful.
"My friend, Colin lives nearby and he's my tutor. I was just going home after the tutoring and craved some ice cream," I said easily enough for even me to almost believe it. I had always been a good liar, speaking the lies and flasities with such conviction and exhibiting no sign that I was lying that the person had no other choice to believe my words.
"He one of the two who came with you last time?" He asked and I instantly felt myself go rigid.
Whatever this was I was getting myself into, I did not want anyone to involved in it. Much less Colin or his little shit who was there that day as well. "Yeah," I said shortly, not about to tell him which one he was.
His forehead wrinkled and he raised his eyebrows slightly at my sharp tone.
I stood up, grabbed the used tissue and discarded it in the bin. Returning back I was about to take my bag, certain this was a wasted trip and I couldn't possibly get anything from him without arousing suspicion.
"Wait," he said.
"What?" I said, trying my best to keep my impatience at bay.
"You didn't come to the last party at the warehouse?"
"No, I didn't know when it was," I shrugged and sat back down. It looked to be that this visit wouldn't be all that useless now.
"About six days ago."
I was holding out some hope that maybe Abeo had been fuzzy about the dates but this was the second confirmation I had received that his dad was really into this business. It made things difficult for me because bringing down Maira for the drugs would mean I'd have to bring down Abeo's dad. His boiler industry would suffer as a result and he would go bankrupt. Abeo will not have the business to fall back on if his soccer career did not take off. Ruining Maira would mean inevitably ruining Abeo's life and as much as he was annoying, he was a good person and I didn't want him suffering.
"Abeo doesn't like the place but more than that he doesn't like it that I like it there."
"You like it there?"
I nodded. "It's a cool place except for the,uh...drugs."
His hands stayed on the table and he didn't make a move to type a reply although his fingers lightly traced the buttons on the device. After a few moments, he began typing. "That day when we first met why were taking a video of those two kids?"
"Kids?" I scoffed out loud. "They are monsters."
He tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows. "What?"
Sighing, I leaned forward. "Those two, Maira and Murat, are monsters. They have made my whole life miserable. Right from middle school they've constantly bullied me, made me feel worthless." I forced some tears into my eyes and let my lower lip tremble. "Beating me up, burning me with cigarette butts, kicking and making me bleed all over is like their daily routine." I looked up, blinking back tears like how they do in the movies. I glared at his doubtful gaze. "What?" I snapped. "Do I have to prove it for you to believe me?!" I asked, shooting to my feet and tugging at my sweater to make it seem like I was going to pull it off.
Nova widened his eyes and looked away, fumbling for his device and typing with trembling fingers. "Stop. I believe you."
I smiled and sat down, threading my fingers together on top of the table. "So you see I couldn't take it anymore and started to fight back but it's still not enough. They deserve worse than that. They still go about doing all that to other kids who don't fight back like me. I wanted to do something to stop it altogether. So when I saw them doing that shit in the room, I had to get it on video! It was the perfect opportunity to ruin their lives...until you came and destroyed everything," I added, not bothering to keep the anger out of my voice.
He sat still and let my story sink in. Although I couldn't begin to imagine what Julia actually went through and had no right to assume her pain and suffering, I had to do something. And another thing I was perfectly capable of was emotional manipulation. It worked everytime when I had to get things done my way.
Finally, he reached out a hand and hesitantly patted my joined ones. "I'm sorry you have to go through that and I'm sorry I ruined that chance for you."
That was less than what I had wanted from him but at least he had sympathy for me and it can be a great weapon. I pulled my hands away. "A simple sorry is not going to cut it. I still want my revenge. I'm warning you, I'm not going to stop until I get that video."
He scratched the area above his eyebrow and let out a gust of breath through his mouth. He looked conflicted. "As much as I want the same for them, I can't let you do that. If they are caught, the cops will be lead to us. I'm not willing to risk them keeping their mouths shut, even when they don't really know much about how the cartel is run."
I looked at him in disappointment. "So you're telling me that we should suffer so that you can sell crack or whatever it is you sell and ruin even more people's lives?"
Surprisingly, he looked down in shame. "It's not crack."
He didn't tell me it was actually Candy that they sold.
"Oh, is that supposed to make my life easier, now that I know it's not crack?" I snapped, then shook my head at him in revulsion. "I can't believe you would protect them instead of helping me. You're no better than them."
When your target feels ashamed of themselves, you have to deprecate them even further to make them think that whatever you say is the only right thing they can do to redeem themselves.
I abruptly got up, blinking and letting a tear roll down my cheek. I snatched my purse as I waited for him to stop me which he did. He waved his hands wildly at me, signaling me to stay.
"Please. I'm sorry. I know what it feels like to go through that. But this is for the best."
"What would you know about being bullied?" I scoffed.
"I know because I've went through it."
It sounded ridiculous. I couldn't imagine this man getting bullied. The sheer size of him would send people shivering in their boots. But if he said so, it must be true. His mutism could be a reason. I dropped my eyes to his neck where the scar ran under his shirt. Was the scar the result of people hurting him? The scar hinted at a great injury to the area and there was a big chance that his speech muscles had been damaged because of it.
Despite that I offered him no comfort. "Why do you say that doing nothing is the best for me?"
"If you do something and it reaches my boss, it will be even worse for you. Listen to me. You should not get my boss to notice you." He gazed at me intensely. When I didn't say anything, he responded with, "Do you understand?"
I gave a slight nod, finding myself conflicted between what I should do. If by boss, he meant Abeo's dad then I found it hard to imagine him doing anything bad to people however cold and unapproachable he had seemed to me that night I met him.
Nova was right. I didn't really know Abeo's dad much but I didn't want to underestimate him and throw myself in the hole I dug. I nodded more firmly. "You're right. I probably shouldn't take a risk like that."
Nova's broad shoulders sagged. I hadn't realized he had gone tense waiting for a more definite response.
I had to think of something else. I intended to expose Maira and Kwame, Abeo's dad but I had to attack from the dark. I had to be careful.
"But if it's any help, and I'd like to help you in any way I can–especially when you mean so much to Abeo–then I can try and dig up some dirt on those two."
I drummed my nails on the table, considering. It wouldn't hurt to get some extra help and he might even find out something Kaan or I couldn't. "Okay, I don't expect you'll get any but you can try."
"Does Abeo know these people hurt you?"
"No, and do not tell him. It's not the way I do things. Their comeuppance must be triggered by me."
"I won't and can't. He never would want to talk to me." His lips quirked up in a self deprecating smile. "I promise I won't tell him."
"Good. I–" I searched desperately for another topic. I didn't want him to draw sympathy out of me. But he wasn't done yet.
"If it's not too selfish of me, I'd like to ask a favour in return."
"Of course it's very fucking selfish of you." I spat, then sighed heavily when he looked down at his hands resting on his device. "What is it?"
"You don't have to if you don't want to. Can you help me get closer to Abeo?"
"You trying to steal him from me? It doesn't matter. We're only fuck buddies anyway."
"He looks at you as if you're more than that to him."
I shrugged. "He can shove that look up his ass because we're not going to be anything more than that, whether he likes it or not. As for the favour, fine I'll try but no promises."
"Thank you. I really want to be his friend."
"Whatever. If there's nothing else, I'll leave now."
Nova walked me out the door. I was surprised not a single customer had come in the entire time we'd talked. "Is business usually this slow?"
He looked out at the sky. "It's a little cold today. Not a lot of people need ice cream right now. Except for you." He turned to regard me warily. "Why did you want ice cream today?"
"Are you kidding? It's ice cream!" I chuckled, nervous on the inside. "I don't wait for the right time or weather."
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