Trigger Warning!!!!!! I'll let know when it's over.
Today Ellie has been really off. She's off everyday, but today. I don't know what wrong. Again the bathroom of her room. I walk away finally giving up. I start to walk away when I hear her crying. I sneak back into the room so she doesn't hear me.
I walk up to the door and knock. "Ellie. Please let me in." No response. "Ellie. Please." No response. "Ellie. Don't push me away." She gets up and opens the door. I see there's years in her eyes. She sits back down on the floor. I sit next to her. "Ellie. Let me in. Tell me what's happening." She shakes her head. "Why does life have to suck so much?" She said sobbing.
I bring her into my arms and let her cry into my shoulder. Henry would be so much better at this. "I can help you. I need you to let me in." She nods while still crying. "I'm sorry." She told me. "Why?" "I've been so awful to you. I just... I didn't know what to do." She said. It was muffled since her face was buried in my shoulder. Thanks gosh it was on my good shoulder. "James?" She said looking up at me. I nod. "How much time do you have." She asks me. "However much you need." I tell her. "I have some stuff to tell you." I nod.
"There's this pain absorbing thing I have. That's why your shoulder feels better." "Does it hurt you?" I ask her. She nods. "It basically can take the pain from someone else and gives it to me. I think can transfer it to other people though." I nod letting her talk. "I felt bad. I hurt Evan and you. So I tried to visit you everyday." "Can you give it back to me?" She looks up at me confused. After a second she makes an oh face. She nods and touches my arm.
Pain comes flooding in but I try not to flinch. "Are you okay?" She asks quietly. I nod. I moment passes in silence. She stayed so still I almost thought she was sleeping. But then she spoke up. "My dad told me princesses were skinny. He told me that this summer I wasn't allowed to eat. That I had to drop at least fifteen pounds." She pauses for a second. "So I stopped eating. I felt bad lying, but I had to. Hunger felt rewarding. I couldn't stop not eating." She pauses again. I hugged her again. This poor girl. She rested her back on my shoulder.
"I knew that it was bad. I'm sorry I didn't tell you." "You're telling me now right?" She nodded. "That's enough." She snuggles up closer to me. "Thank you." "For what?" I ask. "For everything." She said quietly. Trigger warning over.
She had fallen asleep on my shoulder. I wanted her to sleep. I know that she hasn't been sleeping too well lately. I picked her up and brought her to her bed. I knew it was bad for my shoulder and she was going to hate me when she wakes up but it's okay.
CZYTASZ
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