Link {Remus Lupin}

¥ chapter three ¥

"Octavia? Octavia?" A voice was pestering me from my door. A groan left my lips before I sleepily opened my eyes.

"Yes Remus?" My voice was croaky and monotone from sleeping but I didn't care. I was tired, shattered even.

"Sorry to wake you up but Dumbledore and Mcgonagall are here" Remus spoke in his raspy tone. He had a calming yet intriguing voice. Not that he spoke up often but I liked that about him.

"Oh okay, I'll be down in a second" I said, pulling the sheets back. I was instantly hit with the cold air and let out a shiver.

"I don't need an audience Mr Lupin" my eyes rolled as I pulled clothes out of my bag. Remus rushed an apology and retreated downstairs. After putting on my skirt and jumper I apparated to the kitchen, far to tired to walk.

"Bloody shit the bed!" Sirius yelled,falling off his chair. I let out a little giggle and so did everyone else. Quite the joker Mr Black was.

"Hello Octavia dear, please take a seat" Albus pointed at the chair opposite and I obliged. Minerva was set to the left of me and I flashed her a smile.

"Sorry for the short notice but I've come regarding your first task. I need you to go with Tonks to Malfoy Mannor. Find or listen to any information you can,it will prove useful to have a head start."

I agreed but I was nervous. I'd heard awful things about the Malfoys, but also that the majority of Death Eaters were stationed there. Tonks gave me a grin from across the room and I felt relaxed having her with me.

"With all respect Albus, how is she going to be unseen? It's not like she can just stroll the halls, at least Tonks can change her appearance" Remus questioned. His face constantly looked as though he had millions of thoughts processing at the same time. Not my place to question though.

"Ah yes well,I believe Octavia will know what to do," Dumbledore winked at me before standing up," right well we best be off. You and Tonks will proceed this task tomorrow evening and be back here at midnight. Make sure you're not followed."

And with that him and Mcgonagall disappeared from the room, leaving an awkward silence. Remus had a frown on his face while Sirius was scowling like a toddler. Tonks however looked chirpy.

"This is going to be fun, some girl time!" I let out a snort at her comment. She was wild but I loved it. Her very presence made the room lighter and I know she'd be a great friend to have.

"I look forward to working with you, it's nice to know I'll have a skilled auror with me" I smiled at her. She let out a little chuckle as did the boys.

"You don't have to be so formal all the time you know? You make us feel like bimbos!" Sirius was joking around but I could tell her meant it. I blushed a bit and muttered and apology.

"Sorry, Albie and Minnie are quite old fashioned. My social skills aren't quite peachy" my smile was weak but it was there. It was important for them to be comfortable around me, especially Tonks.

"Not a problem Tavia, being around me will soon change that!" Tonks heartedly said and my stomach twisted. It wasn't the same nickname that Niko had for me but no one else ever called me anything but Octavia. To embarrassed, I didn't mention it and instead went up to my room.

"I love this Tonks woman, I'd marry her!" Niko spoke as soon as I walked through my door. Once more I rolled my eyes.

"I don't know if she swings that way Niko."

"Swings what way?"

"Idiot way."

"Im loveable...right?"

".....Anyway I'm studying so hush your mouth."

"Some friend you are. Why are we even friends? Do I want to be friends with you? Probably not." Niko carried on rambling but I blocked him out with my headphones.

Studying with headphones made me twice more productive. Not only that but it helped take my mind off things. Often music helped me escape as I visualised different scenarios for different songs. It let my imagination run wild and brought me some happiness to imagine myself in that way.

When I was informed that Niko had died, I broke down.Having no one, to having someone,to then have no one again really messed me up. I believe that if I let anyone else close, anyone else in, that they'd die or leave me in some way.

I knew this mentality was toxic but I couldn't escape it. God knows where I'd be if I wasn't able to see and speak to Niko. Not once had we spoken about how he truly died, only how much I hated myself for not fighting alongside him.

He was young when he died, only 22 years of age. His whole life was ahead of him. He was determined in becoming a teacher, to help and repay students like me. What hurt most was he'd just began to fall in love with a girl. Mary Macdonald.

She was a lovely girl though I never really spoke to her. Niko spoke of her with adoration and kept me updated on his progress in making her love him. I was sure he'd succeed but when he died I never heard of Mary again. Some say she died,some say she fled.

In this day and age that would be a common statement. Plenty would run and more than plenty would die. Those that stayed to fight were those that were fighting for someone or to prove themselves. No matter the circumstances, blood shall be shed.

Purely because of the trauma of losing Niko, I was adamant to keep myself distanced from getting any feelings of emotion for anyone. Knowing that people around us will die,I don't want to experience the same fear and pain of losing someone I care for. I shut myself off from everyone, from the world. All I ever need is animals and Niko. It didn't matter that I had supreme powers, it means nothing when you have no one to fight for.

I was fighting for myself, I was fighting for what I didn't do last time. Save people.