painful friendship

exact moment I understood that feeling

Past
Looking down to the game formation, type went forward has tran kicked him under the table, has he sat to the other side. Using his side vision, tharn looked to see type, bend forward a bit to rub his knee, making A face.
Tharn turned his head to cock, to then turn to look at tran who had his head turned laughing at his friends joke.
Tharn flexed his jaw to then move a bit to the side, closer to type.
He bugged his eyes out, by the closeness, taking deep breathes, his heart started to beat rapidly.. Type didn't quite know why his friend closeness always affected him like this, but he didn't give it that much thought.
Without missing a beat, tran kicked him again. Type went forward a bit, he took a deep breathe in to rub his knee.
Tharn who had started to talk to another team mate, turned his head to eye type, who kept his eyes down, to the play, with furrowed eye brows.
He then raised an eye brow, to then look to tran who acted like nothing was going on.
Narrowing his eyes, tharn had enough, he placed his hand to his knee that tran was kicking, he was going to make this abuse stop.
Types eyes widen to that action, turning his head he eyed tharn, who turned his head to look to the other team mate, to wait.
Inside his chest cavity, his heart was soaring, has he felt his friends warm hand to his body.
Turning his head back, he looked down, to smile, he couldn't help it.
Tran looked to him, to furrow his eye brows in anger.
He then tried to kick him again, this time tharn grabbed his foot, the two looked at the other. All of the team, looked to them.
"Damn it tran! So your the one who has been bullying type! Why he has brusies to his body. Now you knock it off?"
Type gulped.
Since he started at tharns school, when he moved into this new town, there were still a few soccor games, so he sat with the team, he didn't know why, but tran started to do things like this to him, it confused type, knowing tharn was probably a friend with him, he didn't want to cause any friction between the two, even though tharn asked type where he was receiving the brusies, he just couldn't fathom the courage to tell him, who was doing this to him, but today, tharn followed his theory.
Tran flexed his jaw.
"What? Can't hit the little faggot? Can see he smiles when you touch him."
Tran then looked to type..
"Must be so happy your in an all male team right? I think your over joyed to have someone like tharn here to be your friend, to be so close to you. You are probably imagining all these good, sick things aren't you?"
Types eyes widen, tharn turned his head to eye type.
"Are you....... Gay?"
Type gritted his teeth, he was only 12 almost 13 he didn't fully know.
Tran bit into his lip, he was wanting to know to. Types eyes darted.
"I um....."
Tran scoffed.
"Come on tran, leave him. Alone, if he is, so what, just....'
Tran looked to another player.
"It's...... Not a good thing, we all run around together, probably loves it when we hit into him."
He then looked to tharn to wiggle his foot.
"Tharn! Let me go!"
Tharn kept looking to type.
Type, he didn't know what to say, what tran just insinuated wasent true, well, not all the way, he only felt something warm and bubbly when tharn was close and sometimes hit into him, the other teammates didn't make him feel this way, just tharn.
"Type? Are you?"
He turned his head to eye tharn..
"Um......"
Tran rolled his eyes to then take his foot away.
"Just say it you little...."
"I'm gay....."
They all looked to tharn, he then smiled to type, type smiled back. Trans eyes darted between the two, he then looked down in anger.
"Great, two little faggots sitting in a tree, f-u-c-k-i-n-g......" He sang.
They both looked to him with furrowed eye brows.
"Tran! We are nothing more then friends and type hasent even said anything, stop being so mean to him and homophobic, I can see what you are trying to do, I know you like boys too especially since I've seen you kissed reo down there."
Trans eyes widen, to look to tharn.
Reo the team mate who spoke up then got up with his food to leave, same with the others, they didn't care.
"That was nothing, just..... Stupidity, type, you.... Are....." Tran stammered to kick him again.
Type then got up to then leave, he had enough.
Tharn looked to tran to shake his head getting up.
"You need to leave him alone! Kick him again, I'm going to punch your face!"
Turning he went to go find type.
Tran made a face to look down.
I'm only..... Hitting him..... Out of jealousy....I..... Like him......
Tran signed.
To a wall, with bushes to either side, type was to it, back to the wall, knees to his chest, arms wrapped to look forward.
Tharn breathing heavily, to lean his body to the side, to look down.
"Type..... You should have told me who was doing that to you. Would have....."
Type shrugged.
"I.... Know you are his friend, didn't want to...."
Think, with how he is.... Hurting me and now I know he likes boys, he probably likes you and hates that I'm close to you.
"Type, tran is a team mate, he is not my friend...... Um..."
Tharn looked down to kick about a bit embarrassed.
"Um..... Type..... Do you..... Are you....."
Type took a deep breathe to turn his head to eye him.
"Are you really a....."
Tharn looked to him to smile, then he nodded.
"Do you.... Still want to be friends, knowing I'm....."
Tharn rolled his eyes to hold a hand out, type looked to it.
"Still...... Friends type...... Let's go to my house okay, it's Friday..... I'm sure you can sleep over....... Come on."
Type smiled, to then reach his hand out to grab tharns, he pulled him up, a bit to rough, type hit his body with his, the two looked to the other, eyes darted.
Tharn took a deep breathe, to gulp, feeling exactly what type was.
Stepping back, he kept his hand to his.
"Still...... Friends.... Come on....."
Tharn then went forward to pull him.
Type looked to the action, to smile and wide.
You...... Are so...... Nice, sweet, caring, cute.....
Types eyes widen to look up to the back of tharns head.
Oh no.....I..... Think I've..... Fallen for my..... Best friend..... Who only sees me has his friend.....
Lowering his gaze, his face fell, he had never felt heart ache before.
Your..... Just friends type...... Just.....
Present
"Type? Type?"
Type blinked rapidly, to see he was still staring at there hands, looking to the screen it was too the credits. Tharn looked him over.
"Type? Was it to scary? Are you... Okay?"
Peering his eyes down, they widen, he was still on tharn, everything flooded back, he then shuffled a bit..
"Tharn..... Let go.....ugh.... Can't believe we..... In the....."
Tharn lightly chuckled, to let his hand go, to wrap his arms around.
"Your fault, if you only told me this...."
Type turned his head.
Tharn nodded.
"We..... That means I need to keep my mouth shut..... For today...."
Types eyes widen..
"What does that mean?"
"Mmm, let's go, I'll take you home."
Getting, up, tharn grabbed the cup in one hand, to turn to grab types, to then pull him.
"Tharn..... What does that mean?"
Tharn chuckled, to hang his head.
"Yourll see."
Type signed to look to there hands, to smile, to feel exactly how he did when he was 12, when tharn first held his hand, then not again till that day.
Just like then, his face fell.
Your..... Just friends type..... He doesn't love you...... Not like you love him.....
Type kept his head hung, has tharn pulled him along, feeling his heart ache, just like it did, way back when, he was unaware though, when he told type he was gay, it was because he knew he liked type before coming out, also that level of likely turned to love that tharn had for him back then and now.