What Would It Be? (COMPLETED)

#44

#WhatWouldItBe

Nale Sajero: huy ang cute ng dog ni von, nakita mo na? sana lahat nakita na pati dog niya hahahaha

Nagtagis ang bagang ko nang makita iyon. My eyes fixated to Trent who's having his crazy self while doing his usual TikTok. Mabilis akong umalis sa likuran niya at pumasok sa banyo.

God. It's been month after everything. Ayos naman na ang lahat. Hindi ko rin alam kung paano naging ayos kahit alam ko na marami akong dapat ayusin. I need to fix things that Von made me mangle without I, knowing any of it.

But there's nothing I did when we get back and after I quit my job. I kinda miss all the times that all I'm thinking was how to let the pass day without thinking about how many papers I'm dealing with.

I miss the time that making me think we're not environmental-friendly because there's so many papers producing for us and so many trees had been put down for the sake of producing one bond paper.

I miss the slow and quiet murmurs on the hallway, I miss every lunch time where Ellis would knock on my cubicle just to ask me join them taking their foods.

Absolutely, I miss everything I had before.

And now, it's really a bad thing that Nale still has no idea about what happened. May oras na papasok sa isipan ko iyon pero hinahayaan ko lang. Naiisip ko na siguro mas maganda na malaman niya na lang because it's still a sensitive topic for me to discuss.

Every time I think about what happened, the last talk is all I can hear throughout the days. When someone mentions his name, he's all inside my head when he shouldn't be, at the first place.

But sino pa ang kailangang sisihin? Hangga't hindi alam ni Nale ang nangyayari, there's odds that he'll still mention Von at me.

I have no idea how many minutes I'm staring through my phone, just with the message. Hindi ko alam ang sasabihin kasi... hindi ko naman talaga alam na may dog na pa lang pet si Von.

After what happened, I unfollowed him through all of my social medias, I cut everything off. It was my idea after all, kasama ko pa si Trent noong ginawa ko iyon.

He didn't push me to do it, anyway. He's just there, watching me omit the idea of his life in my life today.

There's a jump in my chest when Trent knocked from the outside. I clasps it on my chest, hard. "Hey, may nangyari ba?" puno ng pag-aalala niyang sigaw sa labas.

"Nothing!" balik ko at dinelete na lang ang message sa akin ni Nale. The more I'm gonna see it, the more something will push me to stalk him.

But I still did.

He rarely post on his Instagram page so I decided on his Twitter account. I never blocked him, just un follow him due to I don't want to push this too bad. Yes, he did commit a really bad mistake on me but something about it couldn't make me block him.

I didn't let myself see his tweets, instead I went to his media where I can see possible pictures or videos about the dog Nale's talking about.

Every move I'm doing on my screen feels like a hot water has been trickling all over my palm.

This is bad, I thought. But I couldn't stop.

I stopped when I saw a picture of Von and his new pet. My smile immediately lifts up as soon as I saw how good he looks like here.

No trace of what happened.

No trace of gas lighting the best person he ever had.

Saglit lang ako tumambay doon as I couldn't fathom the idea of him not being affected by what happened.