What Would It Be? (COMPLETED)

#43

#WhatWouldItBe

My body wants to take a rest already, I've had enough for yesterday and it wanted me to welcome the other day with a fresh muscles and joints. But my heart and mind's too strong so he didn't get what he wants.

"Alak?"

Lumapit sa akin si Trent sabay alok ng beer sa akin. It's not that I don't want it, though. I want something stronger than that. Something that can make me forget about what transpired between Von and I.

For once, I wanted to forget his crying figure.

For once, I wanted to be myself again.

"Hindi na sila nagbebenta ng mas matapang bukod dito.." aniya sabay upo sa katabing upuan.

We are back to the place where he shows the whole truth. I don't know.. I don't know why we ended up here, perhaps because of the silence around it? Siguro nga.

"Why?"

He shrugs and chugs his own, "May nalunod daw noon na lasing, kaya kung kaya, hindi na sila magbebenta kapag madilim."

Taas-baba pa ang kilay niya nang sabihin iyon. Mas lalo lang tuloy akong hindi naniwala. "You're just joking.." kinuha ko na lang at ininom.

"I am.." tumawa siya at tumitig sa akin. "Alas tres na, dapat hindi na umiinom."

"Then why did you buy one?" tawa ko. What shocks me was I can look him in the eye now. I can let my own self see his shadow and immediately, not feeling mad or what to him.

Now, kaya ko na siyang makita na walang galit sa puso ko.

Von coated my heart with fake stories that occurred anger in me and Trent did a great job to mangle everything down until my pure heart finally shows after many years.

I don't want to say it yet but... thank you.

"Ramdam ko na kailangan mo kahit isa lang..." oh, God. They knew how much I hate to see him smiling because it only makes me feel bad for myself.

Because... how can he be so happy when I'm here, still weeping because of what he did?

But yeah.. we both misconstrued everything up and I think.. that was just normal since we both have no idea we were both played by ruthless minds.

His peaceful smile is contagious and it quickly affects my whole system. "Wow.." that's the only thing I could say and went quiet after.

He never talks.

He never asks.

He never brought up the what happened between the talk I had with Von.

May parte sa puso ko na sinasabing huwag na pero may malaking porsyento nito na gusto kong magtanong siya.

But the courage I need to say that was nowhere to be found. Tried looking for it but when it's not yours, it will never be yours.

So it stays inside my mind. Maybe tomorrow or the next day..

Malakas na umihip ang hangin. We both facing the sea and the wind is no wonder cold as fuck. I saw him tremble from his seat and I immediately chuckled about that.

"You know that night's always cold pero naka sando ka pa rin.."

He glanced at me and looks down, "Wala namang masama, ah?"

"Wala naman akong sinabi na masama.. Ang sabi ko, alam mong gabi pero nakasando ka.." tumawa ako. "Why are you in your sando, then?"

Uminom muna siya roon sa beer at marahas na pinunasan ang labi. His lips went plumper than the last time I've seen him. It got me wonder how many lips that lips had ever kissed when I was away?