Every Breath You Take

31

Running down the hall, my eyes whirled around me, searching for a familiar dark haired, stormy-eyed boy. But my luck was as good as none. There was no sign of him at all, not one trace.

Standing in an intersection of hallways, I slowly did a little spin, looking down each hall.

Where was he? I mean, he couldn't exactly go all Dumbledore on me and vanish into thin air. So where had he run off too? Class maybe? We did have first period together, so maybe he had gone there...

Checking my little watch on my wrist, I sped towards class, willing my dainty, painted, and torn sneakers to move a bit faster and squeak a bit louder. They weren't exactly the best pair of shoes to run in, but I was standing in front of my class in seconds. But as I said before, they weren't my go-to running shoes because as I barreled through the door, I tumbled in, tripping on my shoelaces.

I was a complete mess and this was absolutely humiliating. Thankfully, I had caught myself but that still hadn't saved me from looking like a disastrous ballerina who apparently couldn't use her feet right and was tripping over her freaking floppy skirt!

A substitute teacher sat at the teacher's desk, looking just as startled and confused.

She probably thought I was a dork, which I wasn't objecting too at the moment.

Come on, Emily, get it together...

Clearing my throat, I adjusted my scarf and smiled sheepishly at the teacher. I pointed a finger at my feet, "Duck feet." I laughed nervously, "I'm working on it..." The sub only looked that much more confused and unfortunately, weirded out.

Oh god! Stupid, stupid, stupid Emily! Duck feet, are you serious? That's the best you got? Duck feet?! 

"I'm just going to go sit down now...heh." Chuckling awkwardly, I turned on my heels and scanned the classroom.

What the heck?! He wasn't here yet?

I took my seat in the back, wringing my hands out nervously in my lap as I waited. The bell ran and so did the final bell, five minutes later, and still, there was no sigh of Kaden. Five minutes turned into hours and I sat behind or near an empty desk in each class I shared with Kaden.

Where the hell was he? I was sweating with nerves over here! My boobs were freaking crying and lord was I hoping my deodorant was staying intact. I was so nervous and I didn't have an exact reason to be. I mean, I'd talked to Kaden my whole life. Starting and ending conversations between us was child's play.

But saying sorry?...

This was definitely not in the 'How-to-Handle-Kaden' handbook. 

I didn't even know what I was going to say?! Sorry?! I was sorry about a lot of things I said to him and right now, thinking about it was just making me feel that much more shitty. Sorry I judged you? Sorry I assumed you were an asshole and backstabbing one of your closest friends?

Oh god. I was going to mess this up, wasn't I? He probably was going to hate me even more by the time I finished stumbling over my words and sputtering a bunch of mumbo-jumbo. I mean, I'd always been a talker, I'd talk for hours and not get bored, but put 'sorry' and 'Kaden' into the same sentence...

That was territory I had never crossed. I'd probably mess up at a decent apology and that scared me a bit.

How could an apology be this hard?

Well, because I had been a absolutely horrible person to him and I was scared he'd reject any words I had to say to him.

Alright, Emily. Breathe. You're going to have a heart attack any minute now.