XXI. Hatred

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monsters do not sleep
under your bed
they scream inside of your head

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Family. I once had a happy one. I even had an extended one. It was a happy memory.

Hatred. It grew inside me. I guess it made me who I was. I don't have a sibling. I was the only one. I grew up with so much love and happiness around me. But in just a snap, it fell apart. I held on to someone. Someone who loved and understood me. Someone who listened and was patient with me. I was contented. Until I saw him crying.

Hatred. It's a disease.

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Seokjin

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I was never disappointed with how I looked like. My looks attracted a lot of people. Men and women alike. I wondered why people were so obsessed with looks. I wish they were also obsessed with personality. Good personality. On the bad side, I guess no one would be obsessed with me.

I sometimes hated beauty. I believed that was the primary reason why I was abused. It should not be. People should not be abused for whatever reason. But I was.

I thought about Yoongi. Maybe he was worried about me. I knew that he was thinking of my actions. Something I was only sorry for hurting his feelings. Regrets? Consequences? I was aware. But I didn't care.

The door of his suite opened. He was so handsome in all black. I smiled as he wore the necktie I suggested. It was striped, grey and black. He stepped on the side to let me in. Before I picked up his laptop bag, I turned around and fixed his necktie and collar. I felt his breath hitched for a moment. I saw how his Adam's apple bobbed up and down. I wore my favorite perfume. The one he hadn't smell yet. It might be the reason.

"All black looks extremely good on you, Mr. Kim," I smiled as I carried the laptop bag.

He smiled back. A hint of shyness painted with it. Flustered? Perhaps. "Thank you. Did you bring the flash drive?"

I picked up the black small drive from my pocket and showed it to him. I made sure that his reports were complete and organized before coming here to his room. He was my boss after all. I wanted this trip to be perfect. And memorable.

The eyes of the executives were so obvious. They were eyeing me. Those little smirks on the corner of their lips. I wish Mr. Kim would look at me that way. Or better yet, I wished we were feeling the same way.

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