You Saved Me ➵ Camren

14.

     The next morning, Camila woke up around lunchtime, surprised her girlfriend hadn't called or texted her to come over yet. She got out of bed, got dressed, and grabbed Lauren's spare key from under the doormat. She knocked first then entered when she didn't hear anything.

       Camila made her way to the back bedroom and held her breath as she quietly opened the door. Her heart sped up when she looked inside. Lauren was laying on her back buried in the covers on her bed with only her head poking out. She was staring straight up at the ceiling with tears rolling down her cheeks. Camila quickly shut the door behind her and hesitantly stood to the side of the bed.

     "Lauren, are you okay?" The girl shook her head, letting more tears fall down her blank face. There was no emotion there, not even sadness, she looked so empty. Camila was scared, she'd never seen her girlfriend like this before and she wasn't sure what to do. She slowly sat on the bed beside Lauren, making sure not to get too close, in case she didn't want to be touched.

     "Did you do something?" Lauren let out a whimper and started sobbing. She didn't even have to nod or say anything.

     Camila felt her stomach drop, knowing that her girlfriend had just relapsed after over three years of being clean. She knew what it felt like and it wasn't good. Camila carefully scooted closer and let Lauren rest her head on her lap. She ran her fingers through the girl's hair and sat with her until she stopped crying.

Lauren sat up from her spot on the bed, making sure to keep the sleeves of her sweatshirt over her arms and spoke up, "Camz?"

"Yeah, baby?" Camila leaned forward to kiss the girl's forehead and sat back against the headboard.

"Can I stay in bed today? I don't want to do anything."

"Of course. I'll stay here with you and we can cuddle and watch Netflix. I do have a question though." Lauren nodded as if to tell her to ask the question. "Did you clean yourself up yet? I don't want you to get an infection or anything."

The older girl shook her head. "No, I didn't really think about it, to be honest." She tried to move her sleeve up, but stopped and hissed in pain. "I guess I should do this in the bathroom, huh?"

"I'll help you, if you want." Camila stood up and carefully helped her girlfriend out of bed and walked them into the bathroom. Lauren sat on the edge of the tub while Camila crouched down in front of her on the floor. Lauren started taking her sweatshirt off and the younger one looked away, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable.

"It's fine if you look, but it's bad." Lauren pulled the sweatshirt over her head and carefully peeled the sleeves off of her arms. Camila swallowed hard when she saw what Lauren had done to herself. It wasn't anything like what she expected. Her wrists were covered in deep horizontal cuts, right on top of the vertical ones from years ago. They were pretty bad, but not deep enough to need stitches. They could definitely use some glue or a steri-strip, considering they were still extremely red and steadily bleeding. Camila got pulled out of her thoughts by seeing tears falling down Lauren's face, yet again.

Lauren wiped her face and pointed over to the sink, "There's a box of stuff under the sink that you can use. I'd help, but I'd really rather not get blood everywhere." Camila nodded and pulled the box out, searching through it for what she needed. She grabbed a box of steri-strips, a tube of Neosporin, a roll of gauze, and some tape.

     "Why do you have all this stuff if you haven't used it for years? Seems like a waste of space in that tiny cabinet." Camila grabbed a washcloth and soaked it in warm water before carefully pressing it on each cut, making Lauren grit her teeth. "I'm sorry baby."