surprise daughter // greys anatomy

Chapter 23

It's Sarah's first day on radiation, very scary I know but if anything can help her beat this stupid stupid cancer "okay Sarah just lie still for about five minutes, there is a microphone so if you want to talk" a doctor told her through a mic, "your mom and dad are here as well if you need to talk" he then said right after

"I want to see loaf" Sarah whined

"Loaf is at home sweetie" derek said, but in reality we had to give loaf to a better family and we weren't sure how to break the news to her "mama, do you think you can get me some water when we are done?" She asked me

"Yes baby girl" I told her smiling even though she can't even see me

Five minutes pass by and I'm helping the nurse get Sarah out of the machine, Derek and I rolled our daughter to her room "Dr.Shepherd we need a consult" Jackson said, I looked at derek nodding he then gave a kiss on Sarah's head walking away with Jackson

"Meredith are you on call?" April asked

"No I am tomorrow, we are studying for our board in Sarah's room tonight" I told her walking away from her, I roll Sarah right into her room and helped her into her bed then gave her water cup

"Mommy, when can I go home?" Sarah asked me, I looked at her not knowing how to tell her she has cancer

"Sarah, I don't know that answer yet" I told her "let's watch some tv shall we" I added

A few hours later derek comes through Sarah's door, "I think we have to tell her derek" I told him

"I don't think she'll understand mer" he told me

"She asked me earlier when she can go home, we need to tell her that she probably won't go home for a long time" tears forms in my eyes I shouldn't be thinking about my own daughters death

"She's only 7 Meredith" he said

"Yeah and when I was seven my mother told me I was a disgrace and unwanted, I didn't go through what Sarah went through and is currently going through" I whispered yelled

"Fine, wake her" he told me

"Sarah sweetie wake up" I shook her a tiny bit

Sarah groaned and looked up at me "daddy and I have something to tell you" I told her, she sat up and I held her hand

"Sarah the reason why you cant go home yet is because you have a pediatric brain tumor and it's probably not going to go away, you have cancer" derek said holding both of our hands

Sarah looked down tears dripping off her cheeks "can I atleast see loaf?" She asked

"Sarah. Loaf had to go to a different family, we couldn't be there for him like we are with you he is with a very very nice family" I told her, she started sobbing I took her into my arms

Shushing her quietly I got into her bed and I rubbed her back as she quietly sobbed into my chest, I looked through the hospital glass to see Cristina and Lexie "were fine" I mouthed to them

"I'm sorry mama" Sarah told me

"You did nothing wrong sweet girl, we will get another dog or any kind of animal you want" derek told her, I saw a little smile creep up on her face

Derek kissed both of our heads as we faded into a deep sleep