Avengers One Shots (COMPLETED)

Captain Marvel

Watched Captain Marvel the other day and it's fucking amazing and I don't know why people hate Brie Larson because I absolutely love her.

This is complete shit btw but I wanted to get something out.

"Sir, there's an unknown aircraft coming into our atmosphere."
A S.H.I.E.L.D agent said.

Fury went over to the monitor and looked at the footage.

"That's not an aircraft. Where is it going to land?"

"Louisiana sir."
The agent said.

Fury left the room.

~~~

"Boss, there's an unidentified flying object coming into the Earths atmosphere."
FRIDAY said.

"Where is it going to land?"
Steve asked before Tony could.

"Louisiana."

"Everyone, suit up."

~~~

By the time the Avengers got there, a car was parked in the area that the object was estimated to land.

"What are you doing here?"
Fury asked the team.

"There's a UFO coming into the atmosphere, of course we're gonna be here."
Tony said.

"It's not a UFO, it's the strongest hero that I've ever met."
Fury said.

The object landed a few feet away from Fury.

"What the-?"

"Carol! Good to see you!"
Fury said.

"Nicholas. I see you shaved your hair off."

"It's Fury."

"Oh yeah, everyone calls you Fury, even your mother and you're hypothetical children."

"Yes. So how's it been in space?"

"Good, met a few aliens. Visited the Skrulls a few times. Mostly been on my own."

"So, like the new tech on C-53?"

"If that's what you call tech."
Carol looked over to the Avengers.

"Who are they?"

"Those, are idiots who look after the Earth."

"Hey! We aren't idiots!"
Tony shouted.

Fury gave him a look.

"Most of us aren't idiots."
Tony corrected.

"Ok then, how's Goose? You forgive him yet?"

"Well Goose is in the car. He doesn't like the outdoors. And no, I have not forgiven him yet."

"You still haven't forgiven him for something he did like over twenty years ago?"

"Of course not Danvers, I trusted him!"

"What's happening?"
Tony whispered.

"Goose is his cat that he's had ever since I've met him."
Clint said.

"He just scratched your eye, also I like your new eyepatch, looks cool."

"Wait, that's how you lost your eye?!"
Tony said before laughing.

"I can see why they are idiots."
Carol muttered to Fury.

"Stark! Do you want me to lock away your suits?"

Tony stopped laughing immediately.

"That's more like it. And why are you still here?"

"Come on team, let's go back."
Steve said, heading to the Quinn Jet.

"What's your team called?"
Carol asked.

"We're called the Avengers. Pretty cool name isn't it?"
Clint said.

"Aw, I'm touched Nicholas, you named a team after me."

"It's Fury."

"Uh huh sure. How's S.H.I.E.L.D?"

"Good. I'm the Director now."

"Ah Director Nicholas Joseph Fury. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

"I guess you were passing through then."

"Yeah, it's been a busy few decades. I need to go now. Just meant to be here for about five minutes. Catch you later!"
Carol said before shooting up into the distance.

Yo so like one of this girls I know thinks that a germaphobe and a homophobe are the same thing and she will not change her mind no matter how many times we tell her. She was like

Girl:Because you're a homophobe.
Friend:No I'm a germaphobe. Those are two different things.
Girl:But how. They are exactly the same.
Me: Girl, those are two completely different things. A germaphobe doesn't like germs and a homophobe doesn't like the LGBTQ+ community.
Girl: Ok and? Basically the same thing.

I wanted to slap the fucking shit out of her.

—Penguin🐧