infatuation // lashton

16

A/N (shitty?) smut this chapter so

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The sound of blood rushing in Luke's ears was deafening.

He tried to find something to say, but his mouth felt dry and every sentence he thought up ended up a question, 'how? why? since when?'

"I'm sorry."

Luke barely caught Ashton's fragile voice over the sound of head pounding.

"No- I'm just-"

"I should have told you."

Luke's face was still slack in shock.

"How long have you known?"

Ashton played with his fingers.

"Last year. The doctor said I had terminal brain cancer. Well, a brain tumor, and the surgery was too risky, so."

"But you seem so happy, like you're all confident and-"

Ashton cut him off with a bitter laugh.

"There's a battle going on inside me, Luke. I have to accept that my life will be short, I have to live it while I have the chance. I don't want to die sad and alone; I want to live it with you."

Luke swallowed down the lump in his throat and smiled lightly, taking Ashton's hands in his.

"Then let's do just that. Let's make the last two months of your life fucking amazing. You call the shots, babe. We can do whatever you want."

Ashton nodded smiled.

"I want to have sex with you."

Luke choked on air.

"Right now?"

Ashton shrugged and then nodded, looking at Luke with big, innocent yet mischievous eyes.

"Yeah, if that's okay."

Luke gulped and nodded slowly, "Um, yeah. Okay."

Ashton tilted his head to the side and furrowed his eyebrows.

"Don't you want to have sex with me?"

Luke's eyes widened, "Holy shit, of course I do. I just like- are you absolutely sure?"

Ashton nodded and stood up, offering his hand to Luke. He took Ashton's hand and hauled himself up, then carefully guided him to the bed (which was thankfully glass shard free).

Luke gently pressed his hands on Ashton's chest, tentatively pushing him back on the bed. He then straddled the shorter boy, his legs bracketing Ashton's full thighs. Luke placed his hands on either side of Ashton's head and lowered his face so his lips were brushing against Ashton's, the condensation from their breathing making their lips slick.

"This still okay?" Luke was breathless already.

Ashton nodded, "Very."

Luke pressed his mouth to Ashton's, their lips slotting together perfectly once again. Their mouths moved slowly, without any urgency, just passion. Luke slid one of his hands under Ashton's neck and pulled him further in to the kiss. Ashton became pliant in his hands and Luke briefly considered what he had said earlier, when he was still angry, about how naive Ashton was, but no; Luke realized that it wasn't naivety in Ashton's blood, it was trust. It kind of scared Luke that Ashton was putting so much trust in him, but Luke wasn't going to make him regret it.

Luke pulled back from the kiss with a wet pop of his lips and he looked down at the boy beneath him, taking in his rosy cheeks and the way his pupils were blown wide. He felt a wave arousal send shivers down his spine; reality hit him that he and Ashton were going to fuck.