HELLO MY LOVES!!!! :) :* :) I can't believe I haven't been on here in TWO YEARS! That's insane how fast time flies! The last time I was on here was 3-5-18 - It just blows my mind!!!! Anyway, I kinda have a second and feel like giving an update :) But before I say anything, I'd just like to say - I hope everyone is well, I hope your year is going well and I wish you all happiness because that's all anyone deserves :) Okay here we go I guess...
SO much has happened since I was last on here - so much so, that I'm not really sure to start... I guess I'll start with basics and if it's repeated information I'm sorry! :)
(I think I have dates wrong since the last time I was on here because I know I updated in 2019 - How annoying! *Annoyed face*)
So I'm in college, I'm majoring in Criminal Justice. My dream is to become a Correctional Officer (C.O.). I've taken 3 classes so far and I'm in my second semester and have decided to take it slow and easy and only take two classes- which is still a lot since my schedule has upped in crazy busy-ness.
Mondays I have the cat shelter I volunteer at from 10-1
Tuesdays I have Sociology from 2pm-3:25pm and I'm at the school by 1:30pm
Wednesday is my only free day where I'm home alone for a few hours while my grandma decides to go to BINGO at the Senior Citizens place down the street. On these days I either chill and play on my phone all day and do nothing or do a MAJOR deep clean of the house which takes quite a while and leaves me thoroughly exhausted - There's never an in between lol!
Thursday is my busiest and craziest day of all! I always wake up stressed and in a bad mood from the thought of everything I have to do on this day of the week. I have the shelter from 10-12 (Usually 1 but I have to leave early.) I get home and take almost an hour shower then rush out the house, get lunch, get to school and then do all that jazz. After Sociology, I head home for a while (about 2ish hours) Chill on my phone a bit, deal with the always present headache, have dinner, rush out the house for my night class of Intro to Law Enforcement from 6:30 - 9:25pm and thankfully it never usually goes that late. My night class teacher is actually (without meaning to) talking me out of wanting to go into this field :( So I'm currently kinda depressed because now I have no idea what I want to do - There IS NOTHING ELSE I WANNA DO!!!! So it's hard right now :( :( :(
Fridays I'm usually exhausted from the previous day/night. I have the shelter from 10am-1pm. Nothing else happens on Fridays really - just a calm chill rest of the day.
The weekend doesn't consist of much either besides lunch at my grandpa's house on Sunday.
That's that - onto some drama I guess.
I'm not sure if ya'll know, but the past year was INSANELY hard for me and I truly thought I was gonna lose myself in more ways than one :(
I was broken up harshly with the man of my dreams and I didn't take it well at all - It DESTROYED me! I still have my moments where I go through a rough patch or have a time where I'm triggered and lose my mind. It's usually at night where I tend to lose my mind and melt down and cry. Just about EVERY song reminds me somehow of him or our relationship and it kills me.
I had found a boyfriend after the unnamed broke my heart... It was a rebound to show I could move on JUST as fast as him. It was the worst mistake I EVER made and quickly broke up with him and took the rest of the year to find myself and figure out what I wanted...
Ever since I broke up with Mr. Rebound, he had been on my mind since - Mostly bad...
December came around and the two of us started talking again... We hung out, he asked me out, I said no.. twice... Then he told me he gave up and that broke my heart.. We continued talking and that's when I realized I missed him and I've messed up once again! *Annoyed face* He ended up telling me that he misses me and that's the only reason he's still talking to me -because he STILL had feelings for me. I didn't know what to do so I think I told him I did too and he was SHOCKED! Before that I was kinda flirting with him which also took him aback which made me laugh.
