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Sometimes, when people went through really bad things they shelter themselves away, in order to protect themselves. You'd witnessed this with your own mother.

Others maybe start to drink or take drugs or stop eating.

Whatever it is, people do it for different reasons: The first would be to forget; to numb their feelings, to get over whatever they experienced. The second is the simple need to control over their own life; whatever trauma or damage the person haunts, it will make them feel like they lost control over themselves, forcing them to frantically search for something they have control over - even if this means hurting their own body.

Now, Jeon Jungkook had witnessed something so traumatizing, that his need of control (over himself and others as well) made him do bad, despicable things - that's what you now realized.

Poor boy, couldn't handle it. Went completely crazy after he watched his mother dying in the hospital.

In a way Miri was right - he really went crazy to some point, even if this refers to this naturally rather wicked mind of his.

But, after all you knew... could you blame him?

No. Not at all. You probably should, because yes as far as you knew had some of his actions been greatly illegal, but really all you could think about was how you wished for him that he'd be able to forget what he had seen the day of his mother's death - taking aside his... bad coping mechanisms.

You didn't mention your little encounter with Miri to him - or anyone at all - thinking that, no, you didn't want to talk with your step-brother about his insane sex-drive. It simply shouldn't concern you.

Besides Jungkook's dark past did he seem to rapidly warm up to you.

You thought that this feeling of close-ness on Saturday was one-sided, but apparently it wasn't. Maybe it was because Jungkook now felt like he had an ally, who knew about him or whom he didn't need to hide from, but whenever you two were alone he'd smile a little more honest, laugh a little louder - and talk a lot more shameless about his, uh, encounters. And maybe - just maybe - all of this made your heart flutter more than it should.

Even if your new found closeness resulted in conversations like this-

"I'd totally tie your little friend up again if he let me."

"Uhm could you not talk about Jimin like this please?"

"Right. I meant 'I'd totally tie your friend up again if he let me'. Making fun of short people isn't nice."


"Why are you giggling like this? Stop that." Jimin eyed you, making a pretty much weirded out face and you bit your lip.

"It's nothing." You brushed it off.

It was the end of your last period and you were ready for Jimin's and your ritual walk back home. Your fingers hooked under the straps of your backpack you walked outside, blinking into the bright sun.

"Oh hell nah."

Your head snapped in the brunette's direction, seeing a displeased expression tugging on his pretty lips.

"What?"

"Look who came to pick up his baby sis."

Your eyes immediately searched for a dark haired head in the flowing crowd of students, "Where?"

"I bet he sticked it in every one passing him at least once already." Jimin scoffed and you tried to be understanding with your friend who had been hurt by your step-brother, trying to suppress your irrational need to defend Jungkook.

"Ayy Y/N." The boy in question greeted you smiling, throwing a quick wink in Jimin's direction.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" You hissed.

"Isn't it embarrassing to be surrounded by your past cum buckets Jeon?" Jimin chimed in, making you stiffen and Jungkook gave him a smug look.

"And what a good one you were, doll."

The shit-eating grin on the older's face was nothing compared to the furious blush creeping all over your poor friend's face and you decided to take action, practically shoving Jungkook towards his car that had parked near the sidewalk just a few meters away.



"What the fuck was that supposed to be?" You snarled, not believing that Jungkook just said that.

"What?" He asked, false innocent expression on his handsome traits and you bit your tongue to hold back a bratty remark. You really didn't need that.

"Whatever, let's go home." You huffed out, slumping down in the passenger seat.

You wanted to drop the topic and sulk but really, you were a bit restless, "What were you thinking when you came here anyways?"

"Fulfill one of my brotherly tasks y know." Jungkook answered casually, while readjusting the rear mirror.

"Yeah right." You snorted.





Caught in a traffic jam it took you longer to reach home, allowing you to be blessed by your step-brother's creative cursing.

"See? It would've been easier for everyone if I just walked." You stated cockily.

"Shut up or I'll make you." Jungkook threatened.

"Woah, easy there Jeon." You retorted in false shock at his suggestive remark.

His lips twitched but he held back a laughter, concentrating on the road instead.


"Jungkook?" You asked after it had been annoyingly quiet for a few minutes.

"Yeah?"

"So... eh I wanted to ask you earlier but what's your sexuality now?" You'd been curious, but since you seemed to have been tongue-tied like you never were accept around Jungkook - until lately at least (shameless Jungkook didn't seem as untouchable anymore) - you never dared to ask.

"Me?"

"Who else idiot."

"Don't be so disrespectful I'm older than you." 

You stuck out your tongue and he snickered, before actually answering your question, "I'm bisexual, though I don't like labels that much."

You nodded. That made sense.

Then you turned your head back at him, "Top or bottom?"

He cocked brow, "Take a wild guess honey."

"Both?"

He smiled, proving you right.

"But I'd rather top, really, having cute little guys squirming underneath me is like the most erotic thing ever."

"Ugh I didn't ask for detail."

His eyes sparkled as in saying 'challenge accepted' but you stopped him from saying anymore by pressing your palm against his mouth.

"Stop. I'm serious- EWW YOU DISGUSTING PRICK"

You snatched your hand away when you felt his tongue on your skin, his eyes glinting in snide amusement.

You glared at him and he just grinned back dumbly, until a car honked behind you and Jungkook had to quickly turn the steering wheel to get back on track.

You looked outside the car, biting the inside of your cheek while thinking how Jungkook was a lot less perfect than he acted to be, what only made him even more endearing.


___


does anyone know the show 'Dickinson'? I'm in love with it right now

xx

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