Tell Me That It's All Okay / Post Malone

Chapter 15

1 whole month had past since I last heard from Austin.

I never responded to his messages and he never texted me after that.

The only social media I really used was Instagram, which I deleted so I didn't have to be reminded with pictures of him.

After many sleepless nights filled with endless crying, I decided I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and refrain from moping around my apartment.

I had spent too many days wallowing in my own sadness and not giving a single shit about anything else.

I joined the gym and started working out consistantly 3 times a week. I made an appointment to get my hair trimmed, my eyebrows done, and a manicure/pedicure.

I figured a little self care wouldn't hurt after I spent most of my free time on my couch in my pajamas.

After a day of much needed pampering, I got home and looked into the mirror.

For once in a long time, I felt happy. I knew I hadn't been taking care of myself but I couldn't let this break up get the best of me.

I took a deep breath and reminded myself how lucky I was.

I was working at one of the best hospitals in New York City. I had Michelle, the best friend a girl could ask for, and I had my wonderful parents. Who were in the process of moving from Pennsylvania back to the city.

I even recieved the small promotion I applied for and was made charge nurse on my floor.

Things were starting to somewhat turn around for me.

Though it was tough, I tried to think of Austin less and less.

But I would be lying if I said I didn't have my moments.

I could be in a good mood, having a great day, and he wouldn't even cross my mind.

And suddenly one small reminder of him would completely crush my entire happiness.

One of his songs playing on the radio, coming across one of his t shirts while doing laundry, or getting a slight hint of his cologne that still lingered in my apartment.

But time heals all wounds right?
So that's exactly what I was doing.

Waiting for myself to stop loving him.

*****

I recieved report from the night shift nurses before I checked on my patients for the day.

I checked my orders from the attending physicians and completed my tasks for the morning.

I walked down the hall from the nurses station to see one of my patients, a sassy elderly woman who had fallen and broke her hip.

"Hi Mrs. Turner! How are you feeling this morning?" "Can you verify your name and date of birth?" I smiled at her as I sanitized my hands and put on a pair of clean gloves.

"Oh hello dear. I'm ready to get out of this dump. Just still in alot of pain. And my name is Elise Turner, my birthday is 12/17/1949. Geez you dont know that by now? You've been my nurse all week."

I laughed as I checked her name band. "Just a part of protocol Mrs. Turner."

I administered her morning medication and assessed her hip.

"How is your pain? The previous nurse told me she gave you something 3 hours ago?"

"Oh please it feels like I haven't even taken anything. It still hurts." She groaned to me.

"I'm going to call Dr. Matthews and see what we can do about that okay?" I replied.

"Thanks dear."

I turned to leave the room as I saw her husband walk in who was on his way in to visit her.

"Mr. Turner you're early this morning. Visiting hours just started." I said to him.

"I couldn't wait to see my honey so here I am." He replied as he walked towards my patients side and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"John where are my flowers?" Elise exclaimed to her husband.

"Jesus Elise you think I'm made of money? I brought you flowers yesterday."

They both laughed as he took a seat next to her bed.

"How long have you guys been married?" I asked curiously.

"Oh next month is going to be 45 years!" John exclaimed with a grin.

"Yeah maybe I'll get my flowers then if I'm lucky!" Elise shot him a sarcastic smile.

I shook my head as I smiled at the couple in front of me.

"What's your secret if you dont mind me asking?" I asked.

Elise took my hand in hers and squeezed it. "Honey he's been a headache to deal with every day for 45 years. But he's my headache." She smiled up at me.

I smiled back at her before exiting the room.

For a split second I thought of Austin.

Did we ever have a chance at a love like that? Would our life had turned out like that if I never left?

Before I got lost in my thoughts, I turned the corner and immediately bumped into someone as I wasn't paying attention to where I was going.

My eyes widened as I looked up to see Dr. Jacob Matthews with black coffee spilled all over his white coat.

"Oh my God Dr. Matthews I am so so so sorry I wasn't looking where I was going, this is all my fault."

He looked down at me and flashed me a warm sincere grin.

He was a young resident working at my hospital for about a year now. He had short dark brown hair and dark eyes.

He looked like he belonged in the dictionary under tall, dark and handsome to put it lightly.

"Its okay Amy, shit happens." He chuckled. "I have another coat in my car don't worry about it." He replied coolly.

"Are you sure? I can buy you another coffee?" I offered still feeling guilty.

He slightly smirked at me. "No you dont have to do that, it's fine really." "Were you coming out of Mrs. Turner's room? How is she feeling?"

"She's ready to go home. But not until we can manage her pain. I think she may need something stronger than what is prescribed." I replied.

"Okay come on let's go look at her chart." He said as I followed him to my computer at the nurses station.

He put in a new order for a different pain medication and even called the pharmacy himself to speed up the process.

"Thank you so much Dr. Matthews I really appreciate it. Usually the doctors don't have the time to help us out."

"Amy please call me Jake. We've been working together for a while now. And it's no problem at all. Anything for my patients." He said as he turned to walked away.

"Okay, thanks Jake. And I'm sorry again about the coffee. I feel like a jerk for ruining your coat."

"How about you buy me a coffee tomorrow?" He gazed at me with his mysterious dark eyes.

"I would, but I don't work tomorrow." I said to him with a confused look.

"Neither do I." He smirked as he got into the elevator. "Meet me at Track 5 Cafe tomorrow at 11." He shouted as the doors closed in front of him.

My heart sank as I realized I had just been asked out on a date.

My thoughts quickly reverted back to Austin as I let out a long sigh.

Was I ready to go out with someone that wasn't him?