Fault

Chapter 45

"OH MY GOD!" Jeremy snapped up, releasing his grip. "Oh my God, what have I done!"

I remained in the same position while trying to gain a sound level of consciousness, but it was damn near impossible to catch my breath. He began sobbing and pulled me up to embrace my weakened frame, rocking and cradling me like a fragile infant.

"Whyyyyyyy," I cried over and over. "I'm pregnant, why would you do me like this?"

"I know baby, I know! I'm so sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm soo soo sorry. Here, kiss me," he demanded.

At this point, I was willing to do whatever I took to appease him. Even allowing his disgusting lips to touch mine. This typically loving and positive gesture at that moment proved just the opposite. He grew angry again when he saw that I couldn't catch my breath. Little did he know, he was witnessing a full-on panic attack.

"Come on, get out the car so you can get some fresh air," Jeremy suggested. After struggling to exit, he watched me fall to my hands and knees. "Girl, I said calm the f**k down already! BREATHE, DAMN!"

"I'M...TRY...ING! ...I...CAN'T..." I forced out through uncontrollable tears. Increasingly annoyed by the aftermath of a scene HE created, he aggressively shoved his inhaler in my face.

"Here, use this! Hurry up!"

Naturally, his solution didn't help much, but the fear of what may come next if I didn't, in fact, calm down helped tremendously.

"You see what you've caused!" He said squatting next to me and banging his fist against the car. "Shi Shi, I swear to God if you leave me, I'm really gonna go through with it next time."

"I know, baby. I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm trying to be with you forever, but you can't be doin' all this!" I said putting on a convincing act. "Look where we are...look what you're doing!"

"Yeah, you're right. We need to get out of here! Do you still love me and wanna be with me though?"

"Look at me, Jeremy! Can't you see that I love you?" I pleaded, utterly sickened by the conversation as a whole. "I know you didn't mean any of it!"

"No, you're right. I didn't mean it!" He agreed, wiping the tears from his eyes. "Let's get outta here. You're driving us back alright."

"I can't drive, I can barely breathe. Plus, don't even know where we are!" I said throwing my hands up.

"WELL B***H YOU BETTER FIGURE IT OUT!" He roared. "LET'S GO!"

After reluctantly getting in the driver's seat, I put the car in reverse and went back down the path I thought we had previously taken. With zero assistance from Jeremy, after 30 minutes, we eventually made it to a street name that I recognized. Praying I turned in the correct direction, I continued down that street until it ironically put us in the vicinity of Humboldt Park— the very place we met. I had never been so grateful to see this familiar place in my life!

"Look! You see that building right over there?" He pointed. "They have apartments for rent."

"Yeah, I see the sign right there," I replied kindly.

"Well, our problem is that we have too many people in our business like your aunt, my mother, and everybody else. So, what we need to do is get our own place together. 

"This mother f****r is either delusional or on hardcore drugs if he thinks we're ever moving in together!" I thought, shaking my head without him noticing. "

Pull over, I'm gonna take down the management company's number then drive the rest of the way to get the baby."

"But, how are we gonna afford it though?" I said, distracting his conversation away from my son.  At this point, I needed to get away from him and fast to alert the daycare!

"Don't worry about all that, I have a plan."

As I went to unbuckle my seatbelt, my phone began to ring. Jeremy was quick to tell me to answer it, but seeing Kevin's name on my screen made me choose to do the opposite. Faking as though I was about to answer, I discreetly hit one of the side buttons which sent him directly to voicemail. Unfortunately, he left one.

"It seems like you're being secretive and s**t right now!" He said in an aggressive tone. "I don't wanna believe that's true, so check the voicemail. Put it on speaker too!"

I put the phone to the ear furthest away from him and turned down the volume. These actions alone sent Jeremy into another tailspin! He slapped me with such a force that my face hit the window and drew blood from my lip. Luckily, I had the leverage this time. I opened the door and after crossing the busy North Avenue street, I ran for my life in the direction of my grandmother's house...