Fault

Chapter 40

Although I had abandoned my attempts to contact Jeremy the night of the incident, by the fourth day of silence, I felt completely ashamed to admit how much I genuinely missed his stupid ass. Right, wrong, or indifferent, he had become such an integral part of my everyday routine, so him being gone caused a serious void in my life. If it was over then, fine, I would accept that. What I couldn't accept, however, was moving on without answers or some kind of peace through closure.

"Who knows if that will ever happen," I thought doubtfully to myself while turning my key in the front door.

It had been a long, exhausting, but productive day. Completely overwhelmed with balancing the weight of my secret unwanted pregnancy, being a single mother to my now one-year-old son, and a demanding school schedule, I thought about how much my grades had been slipping as of late. With all this homework piling up, the idea of dropping my Microbiology course was now a real option and more tempting than ever.

"Ugh, I have so much homework to do tonight, boo bear!" I whined to the baby, as I set him down to take off his coat. "Things aren't lookin' too good for me, ya know. I'm so used to being a straight 'A' student and now I have a couple of C's. Can you believe it! Should I drop the class, or stick it out? What do you think?"

He sat staring at me blankly with nothing to say. Suddenly, I realized that he was filling his diaper with a smelly surprise.

"Ewwww, just great! Now I gotta change your diaper, kid! I only asked for answers, but you just added one more thing on my to-do list." I said tickling his tummy. He giggled uncontrollably.

Suddenly my phone rang. To be honest, I was pleasantly shocked to read the name.

"Trey! You're finally out!" I laughed.

"Yeah man, they can hold a n***a like me down forever! How you been though? How's my baby?"

"He's good, actually. I'm mad you weren't here for his first birthday though. I just had a lil' party for him at my granny's house, nothin' major..."

"Yeah, well his birthday was just yesterday. I'm sure he'll forgive me for it. You're over there actin' like it was months ago. Anyway, can you bring him to me?"

"No, his birthday wasn't months ago, but overall, you HAVE been locked up for months though Trey, sooooo," I said with a slight attitude. "I'm not coming tonight, but maybe I'll bring him tomorrow, I don't know. Just know that when I do come, I'm not going out there for him to stay just one day. So, how do you want to do this?

"Okay, well it's Wednesday now, so he can stay with me until like Saturday or somethin', is that cool with you?" He negotiated.

Now that I wasn't desperately dependent on Trey to keep our son like in the past, I felt a little more free to say exactly what I wanted— God, it felt amazing! His reign of power over me was gone and he knew it. Just then a call beeped in on my other line. Jeremy's name flashed across my screen this time.

"Nope, not today Satan!" I said aloud.

"Huh?" Trey questioned, confused by my words.

"Oh, nothing..." I laughed. "I'll call you tomorrow when I'm on my way aight."

"Aight, bet!" He said before hanging up.

It was cool being able to catch up and communicate with Trey in a reasonably peaceful manner. It reminded me of the good 'ol times, like in the beginning stages of our dating relationship. You know, before he went crazy on me.

At that moment, another call from Jeremy came through, and like he had done to me so many times before, I sent his a** right to voicemail. After several more attempts on his part, I decided to turn off my phone and simply focus on homework.

As I waited for my computer to power up, I couldn't help but enjoy my new found strength. Trey unknowingly taught me that the light at the end of the tunnel was real. Unfortunately for Jeremy, the light at the end of his tunnel was from a brakeless train called REVENGE...and I was the conductor! Time for payback...