New Kid: Ashton Irwin

Chapter 20

"Please just tell me if she's alright." I spit into the phone. I can't feel anything in my body except the heat in my face.

"It's just to make sure she eats and get her back to her normal weight." How can he sound so patient and okay with delivering this news?

"Can I come see her?"

"Of course."

I hang up the phone and go back in the classroom. Everyone's judgemental eyes are glued to me while I get my stuff and leave without saying a word.

My Carmen in rehab? How long? What will happen to her?

The drive takes forever, not because of traffic, but the war in my mind.

Going back into the hospital makes me sick to my stomach. It brings flashbacks from yesterday and I don't want to remember it.

"Room 19." A stern voice snaps at me. I turn to the same woman from yesterday staring from the counter. She doesn't have the same annoyed and disgusted look from yesterday. Probably because she knows I'm crumbling on the inside.

I walk curiously around the hallways trying to find room 19. Doctors and staff judge me instead of actually helping.

Room 19.

My stomach drops as my mouth goes dry. Please be okay, Carmen.

I tiptoe in and the door creaks in front of me. The white and boring room smells like vanilla, her favorite scent.

I pull a weak wooden chair from the corner and pull it next to her bed.

"Carmen..." I whisper and take her small cold hand. She wakes up immediately and her black lifeless eyes glue to me. They look so different from the starry and happy pair that usually greet me.

"Babe, what are you doing here?" Her voice is raspy and tiny.

"I came to see you." I rub my shaking hand up and down her delicate forearm as she closes her eyes again. The tension between us feels very distant and lonely. I can't imagine how she feels and what's going through her mind. I know she's thinking a lot and just wants to give up.

"I'm so sorry, Ashton." She cries out. My grip tightens, but immediately loosens because right now she's as fragile as china.

"Don't apologize. It's ok-"

"It's not ok. I have to go to rehab and you don't deserve to go through this." She's trying to keep her voice down, but it's not working.

"Stop saying that. I'm going to be here to help you." Hot tears roll down and it feels like they're burning my skin.

"But you shouldn't have to always be here. You should be at school, not here to comfort your messed up girlfriend. You should be going places with your awesome band, not having to keep me safe from my batshit crazy mom-"

"Do you ever think I actually want to be here? I want to be with you instead of at school. I'm going to keep you safe because I want you here instead of Melbourne." She's silent for a while. "Someone told me they would never leave and I just want her to know how it feels."

A nurse walks in and injects some liquid medicine in her other forearm. "She needs to rest."

"I love you. Please remember that." I kiss her little lips and let go.

Before I close the door, I hear a machine start beeping and my tears come back.

"Ashton?" A male doctor asks, breaking me from my meltdown. "We talked on the phone. My name is Dr. Owens and I would like to talk about Carmen real quick." He shakes my hand firmly. He's bald with rimless glasses sitting comfortably on the bridge of his skinny nose.