Dating Frost Fajardo | Fin

004

I cut him off.

"Troy, listen! Alam ko, kulang ako sa oras. Pero ginagawan ko naman ng paraan. Please. Intindihin mo naman 'yong situation ko. "

Nadagdagan na naman ako ng problema! This is really frustrating! I know kulang pero I am trying my best here! Damnit!

"I always understand every damn fucking situation, Zendrea! Always!! But how about mine? Hindi mo alam ang malagay sa sitwasyon ko. It's fucking hard to accept that, I'm just only an option!"

"Tang ina, kapag wala ka lang naman na taping at guesting, may time. Na bilang pa sa daliri!"

My mouth parted a bit on what I hear from him.

"You're not an option, Troy. How can you say that?"

Never kong inisip na option si Troy. Infact, priority ko rin siya. Pero minsan lang talaga? Kailangan kong mamili. Kasi naman. I didn't expect, that he will be mad at me. To think, na isipin niya na option ko lang siya. Hah! Ayoko na.

"What? So, ano ako?" Damn! Troy is really mad.

"You are my priority..."

"Priority? Really? Wow. So priority pala ako sa lagay na laging na-iisantabi. Babalikan kapag may oras at naalala lang? Seriously. Ganoon ba para sa iyo ang priority, Zendrea?"

I'm in verge of crying. Hindi naman nagalit ng ganito si Troy sa akin. He always understands me. Pero siguro he's right. Kulang na ako ng oras, for him. For us. And it is my fault. So I can't, blame him, in the first place.

"I'm so---."

"Bullshit! Ayoko na. Let's have a space for the meantime, Zendrea. We need a fucking space!"

"Tr--oy-" I cried. The line went off.

What should I do, now? He's really mad at me and maybe he won't even like to see my face.

"Daylan? Can you stop the van, for the meantime? I won't ditch, promise." He nodded his head.

I think, he knew what I'm pointing here, so he went out of the van. I let myself, cry.

For the meantime. Hindi dapat ako nagpabaya sa relationship namin ni Troy. I hate myself! Naiinis ako ng sobra sa sarili ko. Kahit pala 'yong taong iniintindi ka. Minsan, nasasagad rin. I am so selifish kasi I always thought na maiintindahan niya ako, Hindi dapat pala ako ganoon mag-isip. I am really guilty.

I took out my phone and texted Troy. I don't care if he hit a reply or don't, but the important is, he read my message.

To: Troy

| I'm sorry, Babe. Maybe you're right. We need a space. But please, Troy. Ayusin natin 'to. I'm really really sorry. I love you! |

Sent.

I put back my phone in my bag and I fix myself. Isasantabi ko muna 'yung problema pero aayusin ko 'to. 'Yong problema namin ni Troy.

Bumamaba ako sa van and call Daylan. "Okay ka na?"

"Yeah. Let's go. Baka malate tayo at magalit si manager."

He smiled and started the engine.

I sighed. I'm sorry Troy...

————

"Wow. Magaling hindi ka late!" Tipid na ngiti ang sinagot ko kay manager. Wala naman akong pwedeng ibang sisihin maliban sa sarili ko. To what happen to Troy and I.

Nagpaalam ako saglit kay Manager para magpahangin. But she only gives me a minute.

Kumapit ako sa railings, at saka ko niyukyok ang ulo ko roon.