Finding love as an asexual teenager is hard enough. Being an anonymous internet celebrity? Even harder, but it's fun as long as it stays anonymous. Eve didn't expect her Twitter account to blow up, and now that 'DukeCockroach' has millions of follow...
"Ah, well, yeah... I'm surprised you haven't noticed before."
Dad raised an eyebrow.
"I'm, uh... dating someone."
"You are?" Dad repeated incredulously, while Mom crossed her arms, looking deep in thought. "I thought you were... asexual? That's what it's called, right?"
"Did I tell you about that?" I asked, frowning thoughtfully.
"Well, no," Mom admitted. "I just heard you talk about it a while ago when Leslie and Tamara were here."
"And you never mentioned this?"
Dad shrugged and Mom threw her hands in the air. "Well, I'm not getting children from Hugo either, so whatever! Might as well accept that I'll never be a grandma!"
"You know there's this thing called adoption, right?"
"Yeah, but it's not the same," she sighed.
I could argue, but my mother had grown up in a rather strict, Christian environment and it wasn't very easy for her to accept things like this. She was used to the idea that everyone would marry someone of the opposite sex and make children together, who would then find people of the opposite sex and make more children together. I was already pretty proud of her for coming to terms with Hugo and his... eccentric lifestyle—I didn't feel like it was fair to judge her for wanting biological grandchildren.
When I really thought about it, Hugo and I were damn lucky that our parents loved us so much. That our father managed to change our mother's mind about other sexualities and that her love for us was strong enough to overrule what she'd learned as a child.
"But Mom, I didn't say I never want to have children, though."
That seemed to calm her down.
"As long as you don't get them now," warned Dad.
"God, no. Dad, do you think I'm stupid?"
"I know you're not," he said with a laugh, reaching out to ruffle my hair. "So what's the boy's name?"
"Gilbert. He's new this year."
"But honey, sorry, I don't understand..." Mom said, burying her face in her hands. "You are not sexually attracted to people, right?"
I sighed and took a seat beside her. "Mom, it's okay. I'll explain."
"All these sexualities are very new and strange to me. Next thing I know your father is octosexual."
Dad snorted. "I don't think that exists."
"Knowing the internet, it probably does," I chuckled. "Anyway, Mom, you are attracted to Dad, right?"
"I'd hope so," he said.
Mom glared at him and said, "I am."
"Okay, well, you are, uh... How do I say this? You're attracted to his body... and his personality. Right?"
She nodded.
"I'm only attracted to Gilbert's personality," I explained.
"Ohhh, okay," she breathed out. "That makes sense."
"Well, I'm only attracted to your mother's body."
"Kurt!" she cried as Dad wiggled his eyebrows at her.
"I'm Sheila-sexual."
Ew. Flirting parents.
"What a touching moment," I muttered before getting up to go to my room and wait for dinner to be ready. Serious talk was over. I wished I could bother Hugo, but he was miles away in his dorm room, so I ended up calling him. After we'd exchanged pleasantries, I asked, "Are you bringing Dylan and Floyd over for Christmas?"
"Oh, uh, sure. Dylan wanted to come anyway, because... well, I doubt his dad is gonna invite him. But I'm sure Floyd would be happy to join as well. I don't know if he had plans with his own family already. Why?"
"Just thought it'd be fun for all the boyfriends to be there."
"Ooh, indeed it will," he said, catching on. "I'd love to meet Gilbert. I'll make sure Floyd and Dylan come."
اوووه! هذه الصورة لا تتبع إرشادات المحتوى الخاصة بنا. لمتابعة النشر، يرجى إزالتها أو تحميل صورة أخرى.
A/N: Hi, I just wanted to say that my heart swells every time you asexual readers say that my description of asexuality is accurate/relatable. It's very hard to write for me (can't relate lol), so thank you for the kind words!
