"Sure. Kung hindi ako dumating du'n baka kung ano nang nangyari sa'yo. Puro lalaki kasama mo kagabi." he says and I felt frustrated in what he just said.
"Hindi naman sila "lalaki" lang eh. They're my friends and yours too. Bakit ba ganyan ka mag-isip, ha?"
Nag-aaway na kaagad kami umagang umaga. These are the signs that says we really shouldn't be in the same room together,
"God knows what could have happened if I didn't come over to get you. Thanks to me!"
"Oh like what? I could have slept with someone who I shouldn't have?" I say and he knows what I mean. I shouldn't have slept with him but it doesn't mean I didn't want to.
"You didn't really give me much of a choice if you remember." he answers back.
I remember everything dahil hindi naman ako yung na a amnesia kapag nalalasing eh.
"Don't you dare blame everything on me now. You could have said no!"
"I did! Paulit ulit pa nga eh!" he shouts back.
"Fine! So it's my fault! I'm frustated and humiliated! Will you just get out so I can fix myself and get the hell out of here?" my tone is rude.
Inaamin ko na kasalanan ko but he's acting like he's the only victim here. Acting like he didn't want it to happen!
"Bakit ba ang ayos ng pakikipagusap ko sayo tapos ganyan ka makasagot?"
"What? Anong maayos?" I scoffed, "you're being a jerk AGAIN and you know it."
"I'm being a jerk? Eh paano ka pa kaya?"
"Pwede ba? Tama na okay? Awat na. Wala rin namang pupuntahan to eh. I don't even know why I'm having this conversation with you." sabi ko at nandun pa rin siyang nakatayo.
Tumayo ako ng nakabalot pa rin yung kumot sa katawan ko at kinuha yung mga damit ko na sa upuan sa side sabay pasok sa banyo at nilock yung pinto.
Nung makapagayos ako sa banyo, yung shoes ko nasa sala pala. Pagkalabas ko ng banyo, wala na si Kev sa loob ng kwarto.
Lumabas na ako at naabutan ko siya sa kitchen pero dumeretso pa rin ako sa sala.
Umupo ako ng couch tsaka inayos yung shoes ko.
"Pwede ba tayong magusap ng maayos?" naglakad si Kevin at umupo rin sa couch.
"Wag na. Hindi na kailangan. I got drank, went home with you, had sex with you and now I'm leaving. Just like old times." sagot ko ng hindi tumitingin sa kanya.
"Things changed, Reena."
"Changed? Ano bang nagbago? It's still the same. We just have sex for fun." I point out. I just finished fixing my shoes.
"No, it's not just for fun and you know it. You feel it."
"Really? Bakit na f-feel mo ba? Alam mo Kev, ayos lang naman eh. Wala kang kailangang gawin to make me feel better."
"Hindi lang naman para sa'yo yung gusto kong mangyari eh. I want us to try over again."
Is he on drugs?
"Try over again?"
"I want us to have a commitment."
"A commitment? Are you kidding me? Last time I offered that to you three years ago, kulang na lang itulak mo ako para umalis na talaga ako. Wag na tayong maglokohan Kev."
"Bakit ba lagi mong sinasali yung noon? Haven't you moved on from that?"
He's seriously asking me that? Akala ba niya madali? Hindi niya kasi alam kung gaano kalalim yung nararamdaman ko kaya kahit hanggang ngayon, mahal ko pa rin tong gagong nasa harapan ko.
Chapter 12
Start from the beginning
