Love's a bitch, right?
Minsan kasi kahit na lumalaban ka na, hindi pa rin happy yung ending. All the fights, laughs, us bickering about nonsense things, making love, it's all for nothing. That's just it. He can't even fight for me. It's not that he can't, he just won't. He wouldn't even try. Maybe he doesn't love me at all... maybe he does but not the kind of love that will make him fight for me.
Lumaban naman ako eh kaya lang ako yung hindi pinaglaban. Hindi ba ako worth it?
Shit feels, huh? Pero yun yung choice niya, I did my part and I guess that's just it. I can't dwell on it forever, right?
So here I am... drifting on the field. Letting it all out.
Katatapos ko lang mag-drift and not to be surprised, naka race ko ulit yung guy last time pero hindi ko na tinapos yung laps. I went out, nagbihis and now I'm on my way to my car and out of this place. I'm not feeling well today. My insides are hurting and I don't know why.
"Miss," may tumawag sa likuran ko pero hindi ko lang pinansin.
"Hey miss," may tumawag ulit.
Okay, lumingon na ako.
"Tinatawag mo ba ako?" I asked the guy. He's the one I raced in the field with.
"May nakikita ka pa bang ibang tao dito?"
Aba.
"What do you want?" I'm rude. Pero mas rude siya.
"Nothing. I was just going to ask you for a cup of coffee. My treat." He smiles.
"What? Hindi nga kita kilala eh." Sabay tinalikuran ko siya. Sira ulo ba siya?
"Kaya nga nakikipagkilala eh. Tsaka isa pa, hindi ako mamamatay tao." He insists.
"No, thank you. Sige, una na ako." Sabi ko tsaka binuksan yung pinto ng kotse ko at sumakay.
Pero bago ako tuluyang makasakay, narinig ko muna siyang sumigaw ng, "Wag! Bata ka pa!"
What the hell? Ang weird niya din eh.
Bago ako umuwi, dumaan muna ako ng Starbucks para bumili ng Frappe.
Pagkarating ko naman ng lobby ng building ng unit ko, nandun si Carlo, nakaupo sa couch. May inaantay ba siya? Malapitan nga.
"Hey. Anong ginagawa mo dito?" Tanong ko at nag angat siya ng tingin mula dun sa magazine na binabasa niya.
"Kanina pa kita inaantay eh. Tss. Ang tagal mo."
"Huh? Bakit ba?" Ano namang kailangan ng unggoy na to sa'kin.
"Ini invite ka nila Marla at mommy sa bahay." Simpleng sagot niya lang. Wala man lang supplement kung bakit?
"Why? Anong meron?" Why would he even agree to invite me to go there? Doesn't he know yet? Maybe not.
"I don't know. Sumama ka na lang para malaman mo."
"Ahhh," Carlo kasi, wala na kami ni Kev. Saying that would have been very awkward.
Nakakahiya kasing magpunta dun eh kaano ano ba naman nila ako? We're not even that close.
"Sumama ka na. Umalis pa ako ng opisina para sunduin ka oh."
"Eh sino ba naman kasing nagsabi sayo na sunduin ako? Pwede namang tumawag ka na lang."
"Kung di lang ako patay kay Marla neto eh." He whispers but I clearly heard him, "Wala. Sige na nga. Wag ka na pumunta kung ayaw mo." Tumayo na siya.
