closer // harry styles

Chapter 84

Chapter 84

"I'll give you two a minute." The nurse smiled and left the room. I didn't even want to know what was going to happen next.

"Harry?" I asked quietly. "Please say something."

Did I want him to say something, though? What if he said something I didn't want to hear? What if he really did start drinking again? What if he walked out on me? I don't know what I would do. I needed him, especially now. I had decided that I couldn't do anything to this baby- babies. They were mine and Harry's, and they were people too. If I ever did anything to hurt them, I would never be able to live with myself again.

Harry ran his hands through his hair again, and looked down at his feet.

"Oh my god." He stared at the wall with wide eyes.

"Harry please say something." I begged again, and let a tear roll down my cheek. I reached for his hand but he pulled away, and my chest felt heavy.

"What am I supposed to fucking say, Ariana?" He raised his voice, and stood up. He started pacing around the room, and it felt as if I couldn't breathe anymore.

"Harry it's okay-"

"Okay?" He laughed. "This is not okay!" He yelled.

"Harry-"

"Don't fucking 'Harry' me!" He interrupted me, and his eyes got watery. "You're fucking pregnant... again! With twins! What the hell? What are we going to do! With Cassidy I was so calm because I knew you needed me-"

"And I still do." I tried to stay calm.

"Bull shit! You're obviously fine all by yourself, and now I don't want to hang around here waiting for a baby- for babies, again! I'm done!"

"Harry, what do you mean, you're done?" I started heavily crying now.

"I can't do this anymore! We're getting married, you're pregnant, we're not getting married, our daughter dies, you get kidnapped, we have twins! I have a career, and this is too much!" He yelled, and a few tears slipped down his cheeks.

"You're choosing a career over me?!" I fired back.

"I love my career! I do what I love, Ariana, and this is too much."

"I thought you loved me." I said quietly.

"That's... that's not what I meant. I do love you. But right now I need to choose reality- and my career-"

"This is reality Harry! The world you're living in with the fame, the fortune, and the fans, and the money... it's not real! No one else is as lucky as you! This is your life, I'm your life, and now our children are your life, and you need to start focusing on that!" I yelled.

"My world doesn't revolve around you and your children! It may not be your life, but singing and performing is my life, and it's what makes me happy!"

"My children." I repeated, and looked him in the eye.

"Look, I- I can't have children right now. Because of my career, and it would add so many more things and the stress would be-"

"Don't even get me started on stress right now, Harry!" I cried. If I could stand up right now, I would. "I'm the one who's stressed! Your career shouldn't be that stressful right now, you're not even on tour! Whereas I'm always on my feet. I've had to deal with Alex for too long, and now that I'm pregnant- again- I should be the one who's always worried!" I went on.

"Your just pregnant! Why are you so worried and stressed?" He asked, and I got so angry.

"I'm worried because I'm afraid of what will happen between us. I'm pregnant with twins, and you're not giving me much assurance that you'll be there for me when I actually have these children."