Really Got a Hold On Me

Guns

Zenith's POV::

I sit across from Zena in complete silence, my knees bouncing up and down. She's been waiting for me to speak for about ten minutes now and I haven't said a word. I don't know how I'm supposed to word what I want to tell her.
"Dude, just talk already," she snaps, leaning back and throwing her legs on my lap. I cock a brow. "You don't scare me, softy."
"Whatever," I say, throwing her legs back. She sits up straight again and grasps my shoulders.
"Talk to me. After missing all my texts last night, I kind of deserve it," she says. I run my hands through my hair.
"I'm fucking whipped," I say. She looks at me in confusion. "Like over a girl."
"Wow, that's...that's something," she says, blinking rapidly. "The big bad Lucifer has the hots for someone. What's her name?"
"Astra, Astra Reign." Her eyes widen as she grabs my arms.
"Are you crazy? What am I saying, of course you are. This isn't okay," she says. "She's an assignment. Your only supposed to get to her so you can kill her father. There could never be a relationship between you two."
"Why not? What if I back off the initial plan?"
"Cause you'll eventually have to tell her the truth and that will break her heart. I know that if I was with a guy that wanted to kill my dad in the beginning told me about it, I would be pissed."
I groan, throwing my head back. "This is fucked up."
"Yeah, but you want to know what's not fucked up? Me. I need a drink or two after that."
××××××
Astra's POV::

"Why are you so mad?" He asks. I shake my head, not in the mood to have a conversation with him or anyone. "You shouldn't be walking around. You just got sho-"
"I'm fine Elijah. I feel fine, I'm just in a bitchy mood. No one told you to be around me right now." His eyes widen. He grabs my hand and stops me in my tracks.
"I don't think we should go over there." I look over and see Zenith with a few other men. Their are all well built and tall with tattoos. Our eyes with one an others. He's the only person I actually want to talk to right. He's a good listener and doesn't sugar code when he says in reply. I appreciate Elijah's presence, but he's not someone I can talk to about these things.
"Its fine," I say, pulling him with me as I continue walking. Usually I don't want to be anywhere near Zenith anymore, but now I crave for his presence.
"Hey," he says as he walks away from the group and jogs over. He gives me a warm smile that falls when he sees Elijah beside me. "You seem to be doing better today."
"Its just the pain medication working. I still hurt really bad," I tell him. "Not to mention how ugly the scars will be."
"Anything on your body will only make it more beautiful," he says, looking into my eyes. A phone ringing breaks out moment of silence. Elijah takes his phone out and answers it, walking away a few steps to hear the person. "Back with him again?"
"I never said I would break up with him," I say. I don't want to talk about Elijah with him, it always ends in an argument. He hangs up the phone and walks back.
"Hey, I just got called back in. I can drop you off and-"
"Its okay, I can walk-"
"I'll drop her off at home, make sure she's safe," Zenith cuts in. The narrow their eyes at each other before Elijah nods. He bends down and gives me a brief kiss before jogging to the car. "So you want to go home?"
"No, I want to be anywhere but there right now." He nods, taking his keys out of his pocket.
"Okay, let's go somewhere else then."
××××××

We sit down on his couch in silence, but its the comfortable kind. Neither of us wants to break it, knowing that this is rare between us. If I didn't know his past and what he's still involved in, I would think he was perfect. But god knows he's far from that.
"Why didn't you want to go home?" He asks me. I shrug. "There has to be a reason. You never just want to hang around me." I wanted to talk to him and now is my chance.
"My older brother Esteban came out as gay last night and my dad flipped out on him. Then my mom flipped out on my dad for flipping out on him. So, everyone is in a bad mood," I explain. He turns his body to face me.
"How do you feel about it?"
"I don't care and don't see the big deal. Sure, being gay might not be the ideal situation, but he can't change who he's attracted to. I feel bad for him," I say.
"How did your dad react when you told him?" My brows draw together in confusion. "What did he say when you told him you were a lesbian?"
I can't help, but smile at him. I totally forgot that I had told him I was a lesbian to ditch him when he asked me out. "Obviously I'm not a lesbian."
"I'm glad. But seriously, you can't let their moods effect you even if it's hard. Deep down your dad has to know that its still his son and loves him," he tells me. I nod, taking what he's saying in. He leans in close to me. "Can I tell you something?"
"Sure."
"You look absolutely beautiful right now," he says. How can I look beautiful? I have teats in my eyes from talking about my brother, I'm wearing old sweats, my hair is thrown up messily, I have no makeup on. "And it's taking so much self control not to lean in and kiss you."
I look down at his lips and back to his eyes. God his eyes are beautiful. The specks of blue in the light green always take me away. "Then kiss me." He grins, cupping my face in his calloused hands. I love closer to him once our lips have made contact. He even smells good; like cologne, mental, and a hint of mint.
He pulls back and looks at me closely. "Why'd you stop?" I ask.
"Cause that's the first time you've ever wanted me," he says, sounding genuinely happy. It makes butterfly's flutter around in my stomach. I run my hand over his stubbled cheeks, feeling his soft skin. He leans into my touch, sighing.
We both lean into each other again, our lips making perfect love to each other. He pulls me to him so my legs are on either side of his body. My hands slip into his hair, tugging at it gently. I want him closer even though I don't think it's possible.
"Ouch," I say, pulling away from him. He tries pulling me back as I wiggle on his lap. "There's something something poking me." He smirks. "Ew ew ew."
He starts laughing, keeping me in place. "Its just my gun." I raise my brows.
"Is that what you guys are calling it now?" He reaches down and whips out a gun that must have been tucked in his waistband.
"A literal gun."
"Oh." My cheeks heat up as I look away. He presses his loos against my jaw, making me shiver. I tag at the hem of his shirt, wanting it off. He gets the message and removes it. His body is nothing short of amazing. My hand trails down his abs, feeling the tight, tines muscles under my fingertips.
I bite my lip as he draws down the straps my of tank top. I let it fall, exposing my black lace bra that hardly civets anything. Why did I gave to agree to get a bra that is entirely lace!?
"Your so beautiful," he says, sucking at my collarbone. A shivers runs down my spine as I press myself closet to him. Its cold, but his body heat is keeping me warm. His hips grind up against me, making me moan.
"This is wrong," I groan. He doesn't reply, just continues leaving marks on my body. I push at his shoulders and sit beside him, covering my chest. "Why would I do that!?" I say out loud.
"Cause you can't do that with lover boy," he says. I glare at him. "What? Its the truth. That's the reason you keep doing this shit with me. Do you take your clothes off with him?" I sigh. "Exactly. You're mine whither you want to admit it or not."
"I can't be with you," I say, looking down at my hands.
"Why not?" He asks.
"You're in a gang, Zenith. I'm just a small girl that you, for some reason, are attracted to. I'm not cut out for that life." He cups my face in his hands.
"I can keep you safe, love you like no one else can-"
"And destroy me."
"I can try not to."

AN: Things are getting complicated between them. Please comment and share! Believe in yourself -Vaeh