Soulmate

Chapter 2: Drama Queens

Grace

    When I finally got home, I went straight down the hall and into my room, so I could throw off my clothes. For a second, I glanced into the mirror, and then I threw on a pink tank top and a pair of black basketball shorts. My body was so average looking, what would my soulmate think about it? Would he want me to lose weight or gain it? Would he want me to workout? Would he be disappointed or excited?

    I wanted to cry, but I hadn't expected I would be so sad when Becca found her soulmate. I also hadn't thought I would be thinking about Becca and her soulmate while I was staring in the mirror.

    Sluggishly, I crawled into bed and stared at the ceiling, trying to remember why I hated Tyson. It didn't take me more than a second to remember eighth grade when he and his friends stuck wads of gum in my hair, so Becca and I went to the bathroom to cut them out. After school, I had to go and get my hair cut to my shoulders which made me cry when I got home. Mom thought my hair looked better short, which almost made me feel worse. Becca came home with me, we ate ice cream, watched movies, and talked about how stupid they were. I never understood why they did that kind of stuff to me, but I guess I will have to put it aside for Becca; maybe he can make her happy.

    She had mentioned coming over after school, but I couldn't find her before I drove home. I checked my phone, but she didn't texted me, so I assumed she forgot that we were supposed to hangout. It was something I was going to have to get used to. She had someone in her life that she was supposed to be with, and I was going to be put aside until she needed girl time. Honestly, if I was in her place, I would probably do the same thing. I hoped I wouldn't toss my friends aside as soon as I met my soulmate, but love makes you do stupid things. I probably won't have any friends left by the time I meet my soulmate, so I shouldn't even be worrying about it.

    For awhile, I flipped through my book for English, not really in the mood to read, but I didn't know what else I could do. Becca was busy, Chase and I weren't on the best terms, and my parents were both working late. I glanced down at my device, wishing for once that the time would go by faster. If I knew who my soulmate was, then I could call him up and I wouldn't have to be alone all the time. Even simply to have someone to text would be nice, so I wouldn't have to feel like no one liked me. Sure it was a pathetic life, but it was mine and I was indifferent towards it. Honestly, it was this way because I was too stubborn to change it. I liked the safety of my routines, but I also hated it.

    I wanted to be someone, to do something with my life, but I didn't know what that was. I don't know how I'm supposed to have a soulmate when I don't even know who I am. How is it decided who I should be with if I don't even know who I am? How can they make that judgement when I still have time to change? Has he not decided yet either? Is that our magical connection? What happens when we are together, but decide we are different people? Is he thinking about this right now, or does he even care?

    I closed my eyes, thinking about all the possibilities, everything that could go wrong. I wouldn't let myself think of what could go right because this is life, and life likes to get your hopes up. Then, it takes everything away from you even if you worked hard for it.

***

    Somehow, I had fallen asleep while thinking about the future and semi-dreaming about my soulmate. But not really. I mostly was in a house all by myself, wandering around, but none of the doors would open. I could hear his voice saying my name over and over, but I could never find him. It was unlike any dream I had ever had, and I never wanted to have another one like it. His voice was unrecognizable, but I tried not to dwell on the silly dream because I knew it meant nothing.

    Luckily, my phone started ringing and a selfie of Becca popped up, demanding to be noticed, just like her. "Hey Becca Bear," I murmured sleepily into the phone

    She let out a light laugh that didn't seem wholehearted. "Gracie, you haven't called me that in a long time. Are you even awake?" she asked, her voice was soft, but I couldn't tell if she was tired, or whispering. Normally, I can tell these kinds of things, but not while tired.

    "Hey, I thought you said you were coming over today. What happened?" I asked as I sat up to lean against the headboard. My back popped in all of the wrong places, and I decided that I needed to go in for a massage, but I knew Becca would be too busy with Tyson, so she wouldn't tag along.

    There was a pause, we never have pauses, we aren't those awkward friends who don't talk because we are usually talking over each other. "Sorry...Tyson invited me over to meet his parents. They are really lovely people and they seem to like me. His mom even told me she'd teach me how to bake. She likes to decorate cakes, and she's really talented," she rambled, but I knew this wasn't the reason that she called me.

    "That's nice...so is Tyson still a jerk or has he somehow transformed?" I questioned, pulling a loose string on my sheets. I didn't know how to talk to Becca anymore, but I was reluctantly trying. I still wanted to be friends. Nothing had really changed today, but I was afraid of saying the wrong things. I didn't want to offend her or her soulmate, so I felt like I had to walk on eggshells when I used to be able to tell Becca anything.

    "Really? Come on, Grace, you have to accept him and forgive him. We can't be friends anymore if you hate the guy I'm going to be spending the rest of my life with. I want you to be a part of my life, but if you're going to slam him constantly, then I can't," she ranted, and I could hear the anger and fear in her voice. Something had snapped in her, and I hadn't been as careful as I wanted to be.

    I sat up a little straighter, feeling my head spin, and I gritted my teeth in frustration. "So you're willing to give up your best friend? We have been friends our whole life! And you're going to give me up for some...some...some stupid...jerk! Just because your device told you he was your soulmate!" I spat out, feeling anger erupt uncontrollably out of me. I knew everything I said was the truth, but she couldn't decide not to be with Tyson because society says she has to love him. It's the law. That's the way life works, and no matter how much I wanted to change it, I couldn't.

    She was silent for only a moment, but only long enough for me to catch my breath. "I spent the whole day with him and he's been perfect! I don't care if you don't want to be friends anymore because I have him!" she screeched into the phone, and the sound of her voice rang in my ears.

    I expected her to yell at me, but we both sat there in soul-crushing silence until I burst out laughing, laughing so hard that a single tear rolled down my cheek. "How dramatic! When did we become such drama queens?" I giggled as I flopped down onto my pillows.

    She let out a light laugh, but it still wasn't wholehearted, not a Becca laugh; she was only doing it to benefit me. "Sorry I freaked out. But you two have to promise me you'll get along, please?" she begged and I wished I could have ignored her pleas.

    I rolled my eyes, but I was thankful she couldn't see that; it probably would upset her because everything I did right now was upsetting her. "Yes, I promise, and I'm sorry for being a brat," I murmured with a small smile on my face because I didn't completely mean it, but I wanted to make myself sound believable.

    "Okay, good because I need to talk to a girl about how amazing he is! Grace, he's perfect! I hope that you can get passed all the mean things he did, because, oh my goodness, he's great! He wants to date for a while, and then maybe we can start talking about marriage. We are already planning on going to the same college! I didn't know he was planning on going to U of O!" she rambled into the phone while I "mmhmmm"ed.

    I didn't really want to listen to her talk about her soulmate. It made my heart ache because I wanted something like that. Which was a strange new feeling. I've felt jealousy before, especially envious of Becca, but never like this, never have I wanted to meet my soulmate this badly. Before now, I avoided thinking about who he would be because I knew that it would only upset me to think about him. And it was upsetting. But instead I kept listening to Becca drone on and on and on like a good friend would.