Evergreens & Neon Lights

17

I stare at the ceiling lost in thought about all those years ago... The day that I decided that Pete and I could never be apart, it was around a year after he had woken up from the coma. It had changed him in a way I never understood at the time, I was too young and naive to realize that it was never him chasing me away,  but instead the dark twisted parts of him. I shiver thinking about that night on the bridge, he had been so willing to do it, ready to end his life there without even really getting the chance to live. Back then he looked a lot like he does now, skinny with deep dark circles under his eyes. 

But oh just how different these two situations are. I gaze over at Pete and wonder to myself just how he found the strength to keep going through all those years alone in the wilderness. Trapped there by himself much like he was once trapped in his own mind, my heart aches just thinking of everything he must have gone through that I could never truly understand. Pete needs therapy it is long over-due for him and if I were any smarter I would have had him go years ago with me by his side. Pete has had so many moments in life he never deserved, we had only been married a year before Pete went missing. I cringe just thinking about that day, but before then we had been together since we were practically kids, I started dating Pete when I was only seventeen for god sake. 

All I have ever known is Pete, we dated for three years before his coma, those six months were almost the death of me, my entire college fund spent on keeping Pete's heart beating and him breathing. Then just a few months after that everything fell apart, and it stayed that way for almost a year. I did try to date, I would never lie but it never felt right, I was walking home from a failed date with a guy who I don't even remember when I found Pete on that bridge. Then we had three of the most beautiful years together, we were happy and we got married and everything was perfect. When Pete had wanted to leave to reconnect with his sister I was hesitant but I would never stop him from going. Those seven years, seven long years I just felt so broken, so empty I missed my other half and here he is sitting across the table from me dunking his dinosaur shaped chicken strips into ketchup.

I smile and look down at my own plate, dipping one of the dinosaurs into the honey-dill sauce before taking a bite. How do we move forward from this, a couple of men in their thirties sitting at a table eating chicken in the shape of dinosaurs. 

"Pete, why don't we try therapy, we can go together at first and then if you want you can go by yourself. It could be good for us, we could get back what we once had." the words nearly come out as a whisper but Pete still catches every one, he sets down his half-eaten piece and sighs.

"I agree that I should try the therapy, because god," he lets out a big puff of air and leans back in his chair and runs a hand through his hair, "You do not know how desperately I want to just be normal again. Well, I mean at least normal for me." He lets out a breathy chuckle and gazes into my eyes from across the table, "but Patrick just know that I don't need what we once had back, I just need you just ass you are now I don't want this to change. Being back here with you has been like heaven on Earth and I wouldn't change that for the world."He gives me a lazy half-smile and I smile back at him.

"We could also set you up with someone to help you regain some weight, in like a healthy way. Instead of us just gorging on junk food, I know you love it but it is going straight to my hips." Pete lets out a loud braying laugh when I say this and I can't help that my smile grows.

"You know I love your hips, and every part of you connected to said hips." He winks and I feel a blush spread across my cheeks. Damn him for being able to make me blush even after all these years. "All jokes and therapy aside after all of this passes. Once we get back into a normal routine and people aren't surprised I am not dead do we have a chance to just be normal? Well normal for us at least? I know your boss must be having an aneurysm at this point with all the work you have missed, and I wouldn't mind getting a job myself."

"Pete..." I trail off but he holds a finger up and stops me from speaking. 

"No hear me out I want to get a job because I want us to be happy, I want to re-paint the kitchen and renovate the house. I want to go on dates and watch all the star wars movies I missed when I was gone. I want to live and be happy and then I want to do exactly what I said when I proposed to you. I want to be with you every day, for the rest of our lives. I want to raise a family with you and do cheesy dad things together, I want to grow old and wrinkled, where we can sit on the back porch drinking ice tea complaining about the neighbors. Because through all this the only thing I know is that everything I have ever done, every accident, every failure, every success and all the moments in between have always lead me back to you. You are my everything Patrick, my better half, my one true love and no matter what I want to be with you from now until the end of time." I am speechless and I can feel the tears flowing freely down my cheeks because that is all I ever wanted, all I could ever hope for. 

I scoot my chair back and away from the table and over to Pete and just throw my arms around him and pull him into an awkward hug. He stands up as well so he can hold me properly and I just cry tears of happiness into his shirt for a moment before looking up to meet his whiskey-colored eyes. 

"You added that last part in, that sounded better than our wedding vows." I try to laugh but it gets caught in my throat, which is still tight from crying. Pete kisses my forehead gently and hums softly.

"So Mr. Wentz do we have a deal?" 

"We have a deal."

The End

A/N here we are, a year and a half after the last update, and I cannot thank you all enough for being on this journey with me, perhaps seeing me update my other stories and waiting for the day this one finally gets the ending it deserves (that being a happy one). I missed this story so much and never knew how to do it the proper justice until now, I hope you all enjoyed.