Chapter Ten

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Talk Me Down by Troye Sivan. 

~Sorry I didn't update yesterday but I was really busy so I didn't get a chance to write or upload anything. I got 6.5 hours of sleep last night so I was in bed until 12 today trying to sleep but failed then I had riding later in the afternoon. 

Thomas's POV

Kissing Newt is different to what I though it'd be like. Don't get me wrong, it's great -insane- but somehow, it's better than I ever imagined. Feelings I've never experienced before radiate off my body and I'm positive Newt can feel it too.

His lips are warm, soft too, and move in sync with mine. I can feel slight hesitation in his movements but I encourage him to be more forward. I can feel his hands on my hips, holding me still and close. My thumb gently caresses his cheek as my fingers latch on to the side of his face. 

It feels perfect. Everything is where it should be and the world is finally falling into place again.

I can't help but to crave more. As sweet as this is I also want to see what's underneath. 

Surprisingly, it's Newt that pulls away before I do. He rests his forehead against mine and stares at his feet. The lack of breath finally catches up to us as we pant heavily. There are no words spoken- none need to be. 

The silence wavers on one thin line, about to snap if neither of us speak. 

"Newt? Are you okay?" I whisper with concern.

"It's overwhelming," he reply's. It's barely audible. "I don't know what I thought it'd be like but never bloody better than this."

A low chuckle sounds in my throat. I have to agree with him. Part of me thinks this is all just a dream. A fantasy. I'm dreading the pinch that awakes me from my slumber.

But it doesn't happen.

Because it's real. Newt's really here, in my arms. 

"I really want this -us- Newt," I tell him honestly to which he looks up, "but I only want it if you do, too. I won't force you into it."

"Bloody hell, Tommy, I really want this too, but..." 

"But what?"

"I'm scared. I'm terrified of the reality that faces us. We're both mentally ill- what if we destroy each other?"

I take in a sharp breath, knowing I'm about to be straightforward; "listen to me, Newt. We're not going to ruin or break each other. I've watched you from afar as you've shattered and crumbled. I pick you back up and I'm not going to stop now. You need trust yourself."

A single tear slips down his face which I kiss away. 

"Then yes, I want you. I-I need you, Tommy."

Relief floods my body. I've waited too long for Newt and now I finally have him. 

His kisses that shower my neck and jawline make me shudder. My whole body wants to fall lazily into his and stay there forever; two souls united alas. 

"We should stop eventually," my breath hitches as I speak.

"Mmm, not now though, Tommy, I'm enjoying you too much," that damn British accent mutes any reply daring to escape my mouth. 

And so we kiss,

and kiss,

and kiss,

and kiss,

and kiss,

Until our lips are bruised and too sore to carry on. 

"It's mid-day, we should probably go greet everybody," I suggest.

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