Raped

Chapter 46: Moments

", you ordered the biggest burger I had without a care in the world of what people thought of you. And you know what I saw?" He smiles.

", I saw courage, strength,and warmth all in one. You didn't need to have your whole life planned out to know what was going to happen next. And you sure as hell didn't let your life take a course of its own. You just lived your life one moment at a time,"

", and that's why you were so happy then. Because you didn't worry about the past or the future. You just trusted the things that were already happening around you,"

", so keep trusting them now. It's what will help you get through these hard times now. And hold onto Grayson and those bouncing babies of yours close. I know they bring you the most happiness"

"Thanks Pop. This really means a lot" I hold his hand and smile.

"I'll get you your regular" he winks and heads back to the kitchen leaving me back alone with my thoughts.

He's right. I lived life in the moment and now I'm too busy worrying about what will happen next. I need to trust that whatever happens, happens.

The bell on the door rings and I look up. Grayson walks through with a worried look on his face. He runs over and forces me into a tight and warm hug.

"I thought you were gone" he softly cries.

"Oh my god. I didn't even realize Grayson. I'm so sorry. I would never you leave again. Not after how much it hurt you the first time. I promise you I'm never leaving you. Ever"

I didn't realize how bad the anxiety was until now. He's too afraid I'll leave him once more. It's all my fault he's scared of losing me. I left him once but I refuse to leave him again. It's the one thing I refuse to do to him again. He deserves so much more.

"Grayson I love you more than life itself. I promise you, with everything I have left, I will never leave you ever again. I haven't forgiven myself for the first time I left you and I refuse to leave you once again. I'm done running away when things became to difficult. I'm ready to fight for those I love,"

", and you just happen to fall into that category. So from now on, I will never leave your side. Till death do us part" I look deeply into his saddened hold eyes.

"Till death do us part" he tries to smile.

~

I look in the mirror at myself trying to figure out how I've made it this far. My entire life has been controlled for me and I never had a say in anything. I was always pushed around and forced into things I didn't want. I'm tired of the way my life has been. It's been a carousel going in circles and it won't stop. I'm starting to get dizzy. I no longer want to keep this ride going. I need to be able to detach myself from the part of my life that nearly destroyed me. Sadly it'll be a part of be but it'll only be just that, a part. I am strong. I am courageous. I am willing to fight. I'm not giving in so easily this time. I'm going to get my life back.

My phone sings disrupting my thoughts.

Come and find me. I'm exactly where you had your first date with Grayson.

Unknown

My eyes immediately widen. I grab my keys and rush out of the house before anyone can see me. I don't need to think. I know exactly where he is.