If a person's life can change in a second, what would a month be like?
David Walliams has gotten into a car crash and he's unconscious so Simon Cowell decides to write him a series of letters over a period of a month to tell him what's been happenin...
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6/10/18
Dear David,
Today I got to see you have your third enema but I didn’t watch it all come out. The nurse puts plastic down under your arse, takes off your sweatpants, shoves a towel down your boxers and takes them off of you. She then puts a bedpan under your arse to catch all of your shit, typically, but today you were stable enough for the nurse to bring you into the bathroom to do it. She got help to put you into the tub with your arse facing the drain, filled up a large syringe with warm water, and put it in your arsehole. That’s when I looked away so I wouldn’t see you shit yourself in a hospital tub.
I do have to admit, I would have liked to see you fully naked while the nurse gave you the enema. I’ve been thinking, David, that writing in this little black book had made me write things that I would never have the courage to tell you face to face. I really do think that I am bisexual, David, and that I have a crush on you.
I’m not sure completely though, but I’ll do a small test to see if I really am bisexual by watching gay porn and if I find it hot, then I must be bisexual. I’m still questioning even though tomorrow I am going to be fifty nine already. David, I don’t want to age anymore without you by my side as either my boyfriend or as my partner.
If you ever wake up from your coma, the medically induced one, and you completely regain consciousness, I am going to ask you to be my boyfriend, David.
