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March 2016

Pippa's POV

I decided to go with Renee, Britt, and Andrew to the bridal shop to help me at least look at dresses. My mom was going to facetime us since she couldn't get a flight in until next week, but we needed to get things done soon because we had the actual wedding in a few months... I didn't want anything too extravagant, just something simple that wouldn't get in the way. 

"Pippa! What about this one?" Andrew asked while pulling one out of the racks. It was a bit too poofy for me... I already wore enough poof when it came to Hamilton... I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. He nodded and put it back on the racks. 

"Hello, may I help you?" An associate asked. I read her name tag, Misty. She seemed nice. 

"We're here looking for a wedding dress for that one." Renee smiled while pointing at me. I felt myself blush a little since it was the first time I had the time to actually plan for this. It was becoming more real in my head. I was going to marry Jasmine. I was going to have the most happiest time ever with her. I was absolutely terrified that she might walk out or decide against it... 

"Pip!" I snapped back to reality and saw them all looking at me. 

"Sorry... Just being here is bringing up a lot of things I hadn't thought of before.." I said while running my hand through my hair. 

"Are you having second thoughts?!" Renee gasped. 

"No! God no!" I said quickly. "Just... Future things... I'm fine." I laughed a little and we went about looking at dresses. I tried a few on, some were too simple... Others were really over the top. In both price and well.. Everything... Some even had so much fabric that I had no idea what to do with half of the dress... 

"Pippa, do you really think that it has too much fabric?" Renee called through the door. 

"Well, seeing as I have no idea where half of this fabric came from...." I said while trying to find my own body in the dress. I clicked open the door and Renee gasped. "Exactly.." I laughed. 

"I don't even know where to begin." She laughed. "Andrew look." She pointed. 

"Oh my god... That's way too much." He laughed. I frowned and saw Britt walk back into our little area with two more dresses in her hands. 

"Try these." She said while handing them to me. "And that one is a firm no." She pointed. "I don't care if you like the dress or not." 

"I hate it." I laughed while shutting the door. I managed to get myself out of the giant ball of fabric and threw it over the door. I watched it be dragged away from me and heard Andrew complain about how heavy it was. 

"It can't be that heavy." Renee asked. 

"Then catch!" Andrew called. 

"No don't throw it!" Renee yelled. I laughed while trying on one of the new dresses. It was pretty plain, literally really plain.. But a pretty way. I felt like I was going to be baptized in it though... So I took it off and tried on the other one. It had lace at the top, which made me happy. Still strong enough to hold everything up, not like it had much under anyway. I put it on and looked at myself in the mirror... Yes.. This was the one I needed to be in. It felt so me... 

"Come out here and let us see it!" Britt yelled. 

"I think I found it guys!" I said while opening the door. I walked out and saw their faces.. Andrew's mouth dropped, Britt covered her mouth with her hand and Renee was fanning her eyes already... "What do you think..?" I asked nervously. 

"It's so you..." Britt smiled. 

"It's gorgeous." Renee sniffed. 

"I love it." Andrew finally said. I looked at all of them and smiled. I felt right in this dress. It felt right. Renee picked up my phone and called my mom. 

"Hello?" My mom answered. 

"Mrs. Soo! Hi, it's me Renee, we met at the opening night of Hamilton." Renee smiled. 

"Oh hello dear! How are you?" Mom laughed. 

"I'm good! We are at the bridal shop... Pippa wanted to show you her wedding dress." She smiled. 

"Show me!" Renee tapped the screen and showed her my dress. "Oh my goodness...." I heard her say. "It's so beautiful..." She sniffed. "Let me talk to her." Renee handed me my phone and the three of them walked off to give me some privacy with her. 

"Hi mom." I smiled. "Do you like it?" I asked. 

"I love it! I'm just still a little upset that you're not going to be marrying a guy..." She sighed. I frowned and looked away from her. "I know I shouldn't be this upset, but I just can't get over it. I will be happy for you though." She finally said. 

"You are?" I asked. 

"Yes. You're happy. That's all that I ask for. And if Jasmine is going to give you that happiness then I guess I'm going to at least be happy for you." She smiled. "You will give me grandchildren... Right?" She asked. 

"Yes mom. I promise I'll give you grandchildren." I laughed. "But right now can I get married first?" I smirked.

"Of course, of course." She smiled. 

~~~

Renee promised to keep my dress at her place, in a plastic bag, with my name on it. She had mentioned going with Jasmine when she decided to go, which made me want to pry her of the details, but I'm sure she has Jasmine already harassing her for details. 

"That means I'll have your's and Jasmine's dress hiding in my closet, then I'll have mine from when I got married." Renee laughed while we got ready for tonight's show. 

"Did you ever think that maybe you'll never be enough for your spouse?" I frowned. I was terrified that I wasn't going to be enough...

"All the time." She answered. 

"Were you afraid that maybe they were going to leave you at the alter? Or just not show up at all?" I asked while fixing one of the pictures on my mirror. 

"Pippa... What's wrong?" She asked while sitting in my dressing room. I frowned and shut my dressing room door. 

"I'm honestly terrified that I'm not going to be enough for Jasmine. Like, what if I get to the alter and she doesn't come? Or she runs out half way through because she's not ready? I just don't know... I love her with all of my heart and I really do want to marry her... But what if she isn't ready?" I had word vomit all over the place. I felt like I was terrible for thinking this, but it needed to come out... 

"Phillipa. Trust me. You are not the only one thinking this. So many brides to be are having the same thoughts. It's okay to be nervous, but I'm for sure that Jasmine is completely head over heels in love with you. You two were practically made for each other." She said while placing her hand on my arm. "She's not going to leave you stranded there either. I know she's going to want to run down that aisle and kiss you." She smiled. 

"I know I'm going to want to kiss her that day too." I laughed. Renee gave me such great advice all the time. I couldn't thank her enough. Hopefully Jasmine didn't feel this terrible about everything. I could only hope she was excited as I was. 

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