Hurt By You [Completed]

Chapter Fifteen

Two days.

It has been two days since Jordan last spoke to me. I tried calling her, texting her and whatever else I could do, but she ignored me and it hurt like hell. I didn't think she was capable of crushing my heart into pieces, but she's beginning to do that.

I didn't want to show up at her house because I was afraid of what she might do if I did.

Although she had to speak to me in class, because she was my instructor and was obligated to speak to me, so that was something, but it wasn't what I really wanted.

I wanted to sit down and talk to her. I wanted to have a deep conversation with her, and although I know that may never happen, I really hope it will soon. I'm driving myself crazy with these thoughts of her everyday and night.

I haven't slept in days. I may have slept for an hour each night, but that's all I can do. I can't sleep for more than thirty minutes without Jordan popping inside of my head and making me want to cry myself to sleep. I can't get her out of my head and it's making me lose my shit all at once.

She's avoiding me in every way that she possibly can, and I don't understand why she's taking this so far. I clearly don't understand what I did so wrong. I'm confused as to why she has to let this happen.

All I said was that I love her.

What's so wrong with that?

I remember Casey telling me that she was hard to love, but what's the real reason? Is she afraid to let me close to her, in fear that I might hurt her?

I guess once you're broken, it's hard to heal yourself.

Kate and Nathan hasn't really spoken to me for a while because I guess I made them mad from not keeping in contact with them. I don't understand why they have to make such a big deal out of it. I am busy with school work, and it's kicking my ass. They should be able to understand that because they too have work.

Kate makes time away from her sick mom to party all the damn time. Also, she works two jobs and I don't know how the hell she manages all of that and have a social life on the side. It's a mystery.

Nathan is a spoiled ass rich kid who gets whatever the hell he wants. He can blow off school and probably pay his way back in. He's never the greedy type, but he sure as hell acts like one.

What the hell is wrong with me?

When have I ever talked shit about my best friends?

They've been through it all with me. They helped me get away from my past and helped me start over. They were there for me and I'm here sitting in my apartment thinking that they're shit.

I rubbed my eyes as I felt myself getting tired as hell. I need rest but I can't seem to recieve it. Every time I lay down and shut my eyes, it seems like my brain doesn't want to function the way it suppose to, so I'm laying in bed for hours.

I look at all the papers that are scattered everywhere. "The hell with it." I push them away from me and lay back on the floor. I can't do anything anymore. I don't know what is wrong with me. I can't function like I usually do.

It was Friday night and I'm sitting in my apartment doing class work that I'm falling behind on. I was always the type to get my work done on time, and not once slack off because I know the fear of failure.

As I was sitting on the floor with piles of paper scattered around me, I heard my phone go off. I grabbed it from the table in front of the couch and read the text message I had recieved. It was from Kate asking if I was still going to the party tonight. I sat there staring at the message for what felt like eternity before I messaged her back.