COMPLETED // i don't want to hurt anymore - enoch o'connor x reader

Chapter 43 - First time

(Y/N)'s P.O.V

We didn't get very far before Enoch saw my intensive shivering and insisted I take my coat back. I did try, honestly, to make him keep it, but when your hands are shaking that much that you can't even pull a piece of material over your boyfriend, you know that there is nothing you can do.
The poor visibility due to the rain meant we were left to stumble blindly through the trees, somehow managing to grip onto each others hand and not be pulled over after every log that we (mainly Enoch) tripped over (he's actually clumsy as fuck, would you believe it).

Needless to say, I was relieved to get back to the house, and back to warmth and comfort, that I slammed the front door open and sighed loudly. I stepped over the threshold, and turned to help Enoch out, whose fingers were shivering so much that he couldn't untie his shoelaces. But the only expression I saw was of shock.
"Hey, Enoch, you okay?" I said, frowning.
"Did you forget - " he hissed, but with an amused glint in his eye, " - that Miss Peregrine is probably up in her room, wondering what that mysterious noise coming from downstairs is? Not to mention all the other children?"
My eyes widened at my stupidity. Even though I'm like this all the time, my idiocy never fails to surprise me. "Shit." I whispered.
Enoch shrugged, shaking with silent laughter. Seeing as what I had just said wasn't that funny, it was probably brought on by hyperthermia or something, rather than my comedic ability.
He gestured to the stairway that led to his basement, and I raised an eyebrow. I had expected him to say goodnight and shoo me off to bed like a fussy matron (possibly with a glass of hot milk), but this was much more preferable. I let him wrap an arm around my waist and lead me down into the darkness.

Enoch pulled the old-fashioned light cord, and I watched happily as a warm amber flow filled the usually dark and gloomy space. He shut the door, and I sighed again, sure that no-one could hear is now.
"So... The basement, huh?" I said, peeling off my sodden coat and placing it on the concrete floor.
Enoch smiled. "Yeah, well, I've got a bed down here, and I wasn't going to let you sleep alone tonight... Far too cold."
"You do realise that you have an actual bedroom, right?"
"Of course. But do you seriously think that Horace, and a drunk Horace at that, would be happy to share a room with you, especially if you were in my bed?"
I laughed, making my way over to Enoch and resting my head on his shoulder and placing my arms gently around his neck. "True."
"And anyway..." Enoch started to say nervously, "I mean, I'm not making you do anything at all, you know I'd never do that, but what I was saying before... We could do it now."
I felt my heart rate increase so violently, I was surprised that Enoch couldn't feel it against my chest. I knew exactly what he was talking about. "Uhh... I mean, it would be... Okay. I think... I think I'm ready, anyway. Yeah. Let's... Let's do it."
Enoch stood back from me very slightly, with a slight smile on his lips. "Really? I didn't think you would want to."
I raised an eyebrow. "Oh, because you think I'm just some... saint, who never does wild and exciting things?"
Which I completely was.
"No, I know you are," he laughed, loosening the dark blue tie he always wore underneath his grey pullover.  I reached up and kissed his cheek, rolling my eyes. "Why do you wear that thing, anyway?"
"What, the tie?" He undid it completely and pulled it from his neck. "I don't know. I guess it just makes me feel organised... And you like it." He smirked and placed his hands on my waist, before closing his eyes and leaning into kiss me.

Before long, it wasn't a kiss. I mean, technically it still was, but I was on my back, Enoch straddling my waist, topless. He wasn't muscly, just slim, but still, his pale skin was really hot, I'm not going to lie. I froze slightly as I felt his cold hands unbutton my blouse, remembering Horace's dream... This must be it. This was the part where Miss P stopped it, and now I was going to find out what happened next.
He unbuttoned it fully, pausing his kissing slightly to pull the material from underneath me and throw it to one side.
"(Y/N), you're so fucking beautiful... Why are you so self conscious?" He said, his face softening as he looked at me semi-naked.
And the good thing was... I didn't feel the need to cover up. I was completely comfortable with him, finally.
"I'm only like that with people who I don't trust fully... and you're different." I said, before reaching out to his belt and unbuckled it quickly. Enoch quickly pulled down his trousers and I felt my heart beat at a thousand times faster than it was before. I was so, so nervous, but at the same time, so excited. This was new. Sure, it was scary, but it was something I'd never done before, and I wanted to try it. I glanced down quickly to see that he had an erection, and he turned his head away, blushing, just as I did.
"Um, do you want me to..." Enoch gestured to my skirt, and I nodded nervously. He pulled it down gently, pushing it to the floor as he had done with my blouse.
We were both left in just our underwear.
Enoch paused his and my undressing to place his hands on the workbench where we were lying, either side of my head, and to lean his face into mine, so our noses were just touching, ever so slightly.
"Hey, are you sure you want to do this?" He whispered. "I'm not up for forcing you into anything."
"No, I'm ready. Why, are you scared?" I said with a fake smirk, trying to add some more sexual tension into the air. This made Enoch put his face into the crook of my neck and give me... Yes, another hickey. He then reached his hands behind my back and slowly, ever so slowly, undid the clasp on my bra. He pulled it out from underneath me and his face turned bright red, again, and I resisted the temptation to cover myself with my arms.
Not the reaction I was expecting, but good enough.
He swallowed. "Sorry, I'm just... Inexperienced."
"It's okay. I am, too. Probably more so."
Enoch swung his legs over the workbench in order to pull his boxers off, and I looked away as he re-situated himself above me. I was going to give him some privacy, after all, seeing as he was being so courteous to me. He pointed to my underwear. "Do you want me to take that off?"
I nodded, trying for a smile. It felt real now, like we were really going to do it. And, the good thing was, I didn't feel scared anymore, because... I was with Enoch.
Enoch looped one finger around the waistband and slipped it off quickly, before positioning himself to... Yeah.
"Ready?"
"Uh huh."
I squeezed my eyes shut in anticipation.

I gasped haltingly when I felt him in me. They don't teach you that in Sex Ed., do they, that it would feel like that. I knew it would hurt, but it was a different kind of pain to what I'd expected.
Enoch picked up on this noise and withdrew, concerned. "Hey, are you alright? I... I don't want to hurt you."
"No, I'm fine. The faster you go, it might be better..." I said, which may or may not have been the most seductive thing I could manage at that moment.
And so he did. I threw my head back as he kissed along my collarbone simultaneously, moaning slightly. Enoch's hands gripped the sides of my torso, just underneath my chest, and I could feel him continuously tense harder as he tried to contain a groan (unsuccessfully).
Eventually, after a couple of minutes of this high-speed, moan-worthy excitement, he twisted slightly as he became slower. At long last he stopped, letting his body fall completely onto mine, burying his face in my hair and breathing heavily. I nudged him over slightly so we were on our sides, hugging, and grinned as he murmured: "You know, that was... That was amazing."
"It... It definitely was," I replied, panting similarly.
"But, next time, you could do a little work. I mean, I'm fucking exhausted."
"Oh, so there's a next time?"
"There sure is, baby. And next time, it's gonna be even better." And with that, he reached down, pulling a faded white sheet from underneath the workbench, and draping it over us, barely covering our interlocked pale bodies. With Enoch next to me, breathing steadily into my ear, I fell into a contented sleep.