cherry blossoms || ot7 [#Wattys2017]

[moving on]

Thirteen years. Thirteen years and Taehyung spent all thirteen of those years looking for his missing brother. Thirteen years, he suffered under the hand of his father and the crushing loneliness that followed with his best friend being gone. Thirteen excruciating years and he's starting to give up on finding someone who could very well be dead by now.

"Mian haeyo," Taehyung utters as he places his face in his hands. "I'm sorry that I didn't try hard enough to save you. Just know that I love you and I hope you're happy now." He bites down on his lower lip as he stops the tears from escaping the corners of his eyes. A picture of Kookie and Taehyung when they were younger faces Taehyung, mocking him. He hugs his knees closer to his body, craving physical and emotional comfort. He looks straight at the photo and says, "You know, there are days where I miss you like hell, which is often. Actually, that's every single day. There are days where I wish you were here to protect me. I know appa is just frustrated...he doesn't mean it at all. Sometimes, I wish you didn't exist and then maybe I'd have a chance with eommawa appa, but they still wouldn't treat me any differently."

Taehyung lights a candle and closes his eyes. "I just wish...I just wish..." He blows the candle out on the cake. He turns twenty-one today. "Happy birthday hyung..." A tear escapes his ducts and falls onto the picture in his lap. "Saeng-il chukahamnida, saeng-il chukahamnida. Saranghaneun Kookie..." He chokes on the name he'd given his older brother; he doesn't remember his real name because this is the only name he ever called him, but it's still his name.

Since his appa blames him for Kookie's disappearance, Taehyung isn't allowed to participate in the birthday festivities. His eomma feels bad for him, but she can't do anything about it, so Taehyung used to celebrate his older brother's birthday in secrecy, up in his small bedroom. In his closet, he stashes every birthday present he ever got for his brother for the past thirteen years.

Ever since he moved out from his parents' home, he could finally celebrate Kookie's birthday in his own apartment, yet it's still a somber event. It doesn't bring happy memories because he's not there with him. "I wonder where you are now hyung, if you're still around here..." Tae's tears transforms into hysterical sobs as he releases the pent up sadness.

Tae takes his phone out and texts his best friend. 

Tae: Can you come home?

A response comes immediately. 

Hyung: Why? What's wrong?

Tae: I thought I could forget him.

Hyung: I'll be right there.

In the span of five minutes, a knock on the door resonates throughout the apartment. Taehyung runs down the hallway and swings the door open. Immediately, he wraps his arms around the older boy. "Hyung...I really thought I could do it. I really thought I could forget."

"Shh...it's okay. I know it's hard." The boy rubs circles on his back in a comforting manner. "I'm here now; I've been here and I'll always be here for you."

"Thank you," Taehyung breathes. "I missed you so much Jimin."

He lightly chuckles. "You just saw me last night. I literally just had classes today."

"I know, I know, but I really missed you. We used to hang out like every day." Tae pouts and crosses his arms over his chest.

"That was before we got jobs TaeTae," Jimin smiles.

"Yeah, but we both have the day off today," he smiles shyly. "We could celebrate Kookie's birthday together." Tae reaches out for Jimin's hand and he happily accepts the offer.

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