Demons of My past

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Zainab's POV

I watched as snow fell for the first time in mid-December. At this moment, I didn't know what to feel. Better yet, I didn't know what to focus my feeling on. Should I focus on how there is a psychopath after my life?Or, should I focus on how I was getting engaged tonight?

Engaged...I was getting engaged at only 18, to a man I knew, and at the same time didn't know all that well. Who, let's not forget had been in love with another woman. So in love, he was ready to marry her. I frowned, was I a lunatic for going along with this madness. I nervously twisted my hands before I interlocked them to keep them steady. I looked down at my beautiful golden gown trying to keep the dread down.

'What was wrong with me?' I thought.

How could I be sitting here second guessing myself? This wasn't the time for that. I was all dressed up. It was a little too late to try and back out. I let out a sigh looking around the suite I was sitting in, in the Plaza Hotel. Which was where my engagement was being held. I stood up and began to pace frantically. I needed to get a hold of myself this wasn't the moment to chicken out.

I had fully known what I was getting into, for thirteen years. That should have been enough time to get used to the idea, right? But apparently, that wasn't the case. I didn't know what made me more nervous. The fact that I was practically getting married at eighteen. Or that the man I was marrying, was Yunus of all people. Who for the five years he wasn't in my life, had gone off and ...

'Ya Allah' what was wrong with me? Why was I so confused?

Why did I care that he had been in love with another woman? Why should it bother me so much? I began to pace again. I didn't care....I couldn't care .......there was no way in hell I was going to let this bother me. I took a few deep breaths to clear my head.

'I mean come on... this was stupid Yunus I was thinking about here' I thought to myself.

This was Mr. Prince of Ice, I was talking about, emotionless Yunus. It didn't matter that he had the most amazing body or eyes. Or that he had the most irresistible locks of hair, that I would love to run my hands through. Or that..............

'Oh NO women, Stop thinking like that. I'm not going down that road again," I thought frantically.

I wasn't going to turn into my old self. I had sworn to myself that I wouldn't let Yunus enter my heart again. I had learned from my heart ache. I wasn't going to drool over a guy who wouldn't take notice of me. I walked slowly to the mirror and watched as slowly snow covered everything in sight. Most girls would be happy and thrilled, to know they were going to marry their first love. I, on the other hand, dreaded it. I sighed resting my cheek against the cool glass. I smiled a humorless laugh, at least I had focused my feeling on something.

This only made me think of the psychopath. Who was this person? What did they want from me? Maybe it had all been a prank. But, remembering the bloody finger in my locker, made me reconsider that thought. I wanted to go back to school. I didn't want this to stop me from living. I didn't like missing school on the grounds of being sick. I hadn't missed any work thanks to Yahya. 

But, I missed hanging out and goofing around with my friends. I knew I would at least see them tonight. I smiled a genuine smile at that thought. I loved my dad and brother. But, I needed my girls around me too.

As I was about to turn away from the window, a cool hand touched my shoulder. I jumped ten feet in the air, frightened beyond words.

"I'm sorry honey, I hadn't meant to scare you, but I have been saying your name, you didn't seem to hear me," said an all too familiar voice.