From Me to You [Complete]

79

I call Izzy, who is slightly panicked over my sudden hang up from earlier. With as much information as I feel comfortable giving in front of Michael, I let her know that we talked. That we figured things out. I let her know her letter will get finished and sent soon, with plenty of details included. She's glad that I talked things over with Michael, but she can tell something is on my mind. I realize how right she is, as a different guilt than the one I had for Michael starts to gnaw away at me. I know what I need to do, even though my stomach resident wants to fly away when I think about it. I tell Izzy to think about organizing a get together with Monica and MC soon, then I hang up.

I turn back to Michael, who has pleasantly watched me, listening to my conversation. "Hey, do you think I can call one other person?" I ask. "I think I should talk to my mom about...well, tell her that you're here."

"Sure," he says. "But you better give me something interesting to do while I wait."

"Haha," I say. I pick up a magazine that's on the counter and toss it to him. He catches it deftly. "Study up on how to make the perfect barbequed chicken," I say with a laugh, seeing the magazine cover.

"Will do," he says slyly. I shake my head at him, then walk up the stairs.

I pick up the cordless phone and take it to my room, closing the door behind me. Taking a deep breath, I try to prepare myself for what will come, although I have no idea what that might be. I dial the number for my parents' cellphone, then hold it up to my ear as it rings.

"Hello?" my mom answers.

I swallow. "Hey mom, can we talk?"

I think she hears something in the tone of my voice, because she quickly replies, "Yes, just let me get inside so I can hear you a little better." I hear music and laughter in the background. There's a shuffling sound then a click and the background noises are cut off. "Okay, all good. What's up?"

"Mom I need to tell you something." My voice catches. "It's about...Michael."

She takes a deep breath. "Okay," she says.

Somehow I start to talk about what happened on Friday night. A somewhat abbreviated version. That we snuck out to the beach. That he asked if I wanted to go all the way, and that we almost ended up doing it. I make it clear that I wasn't ready to go all the way, in case she thinks I wanted to. On one hand I wish she was here, so I could read the feelings on her face, just as readable as mine. But I don't know if I would want to know exactly how she feels about all of this. I've never gone out with anyone before, and I don't know her opinion on it. "I'm so sorry that I lied to you in the car yesterday. I just had no idea how to talk about it. Especially with Andy and Dad there."

There's silence on my mom's end for a second, then I hear her take another deep breath. "Sorry, I'm just trying to process everything," she says slowly.

"Yea, of course," I say. I fiddle with a thread on my bedsheet.

"Amanda... I'm sorry that you felt uncomfortable talking to me. I never want you to feel like we can't talk about things like this," my mom says.

"I know," I say sincerely. "I just..."

"I know, not in front of your dad and brother," she says, "But I'm glad you told me now. I never knew you were going through all of this stuff on your own. That wasn't fair to you. I'm sorry that I left you all alone."

"Oh mom, it's okay. Honestly. I think I needed the time to process stuff on my own," I say sincerely. "I think I've learned that I tend to fair better when I can work through things on my own from a distance."

"Amanda," she says hesitantly. "When it comes to relationships...or just physical things in general... You know that you never have to do anything with anyone if you aren't okay with it."

I sigh, wondering how my mom would react if she heard about Michael's experience with that other girl. "I know."

"You're sure he didn't...force you?" she asks, and I can hear the worry in her voice.

"He didn't," I say firmly. "Even when he kissed me for the very first time, he asked if I was okay." A short laugh escapes from my lips, but then I feel serious again. "He had a bad experience in the past...where he felt forced to do things he didn't want to do. And I know he would never do that to me," I say sincerely.

"I'm sorry to hear about that. But I guess it helped here with you," my mom says wryly. I think from what I know Michael wouldn't hurt me anyway, but I understand that my mom appreciates having some justification for how a guy treats her daughter. "Are you sure you're okay right now? After everything that happened?" she asks.

I almost blurt out that Michael and I talked about things. "Yes..."

"That sounds really confident," she remarks.

I take a deep breath. "Well, here's the thing. Michael is here."

"He's in the house?" she asks, and I hear the classic parental tone coming back into the conversation.

"Yes..." I exhale. "I really don't want to lie about this stuff anymore. I want to be open with you."

She takes a deep breath. "Thank you. I'll try my best not to jump to any conclusions."

I smile. "He drove here today in André's car. To figure things out between us. We talked a lot about physical things. About waiting for a while." I make sure to accent that last part.

"Well, that's...a relief," she says. "And he's only been there for a little bit?"

"Yes, not even an hour," I reply.

"Well, I am glad that you guys figured things out." Then I hear a smile in her voice. "It's really nice seeing the two of you together."

"Really?" I ask, feeling a flush in my cheeks.

"Yes, really," she replies.

"Hey mom?"

"Yes?"

"Do you...do you think it would be okay if Michael stayed here tonight? Just so he doesn't have to drive all the way back home."

She sighs, and I think I might have reached my limit for requests. "I guess so," she says finally. "Just as a reminder, there's a fair amount of spare beds in our house." I flush. Her voice sobers. "We can talk more about this tomorrow when I get home?" she asks.

"Yes, we can," I agree. "And I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner."

I hear her breathe for a second. "It would be nicer for me if Andy was home with you guys tonight. Can you make sure he is?"

I realize that Andy's habits are very clear to her. "Yes," I say. "I'll make sure Andy hangs out with us tonight." Although I have no idea what we will do.

"Thank you," she says.

"No, mom, thank you...for everything."

"You're welcome. You can come talk to me anytime," she intones. I make a mental note to update her as soon as possible if anything changes between Michael and me in the near future. "By the way, you should talk to Michael, figure out when and how you guys will see each other. Your dad and I can talk it over with you too. It'll be harder once you're both in school. But there's still a bit of summer left."

I smile. "I will definitely do that." She laughs. I hear something loud on her end. "Sorry for taking you away from the party for so long," I say sincerely.

"It's alright," she says. "But maybe it's about time you get back to your guest."

"Okay. Thanks. I love you."

I hear a smile in her voice as she says, "I love you too."

Shehangs up, and I take the phone away from my ear. I had no idea how thatconversation was going to go. But my mom knew exactly what to say. Someday Ihope I can handle myself as well as she can.