Doubt It Gets Better ● (Colby Brock)

Ch. 20 Help

After I'd gotten out of the hospital finally, my mom didn't let me go back to school immediately. She said that she wants the bullying to somehow simmer down, because she doesn't want me getting hurt again. Like that's gonna do anything. So she insisted on me staying home for an extra 3 days, which I did not mind at all.

When I did come back to school, people kept calling me an attention whore, telling me that I attempted suicide for attention. Are you kidding me. Even people that I've never met before started calling me names and laughing at me for stuff that has nothing to do with them. I hate people.

My sophomore year did not get any better. It just got worse and worse. Kennedy and Justin had been turning the whole school against me, so now I can't even make friends anymore. Not that I would want to make friends with any of these people.

My beatens has gotten worse, to the point I have to cut almost every day now to try to forget the pain people put me through cause they think it's fun. I now have to wear many bracelets on my wrists to cover them.

Now Justin is one of the most confusing people I know. Every time he's with Kennedy or his group of friends, he would always bully me really badly physically and emotionally, acting like he hates me so much that he would kill me if he could. But other times when we are in the same class, he would be really nice to me and compliment me like I'm his actual friend.

One time in Spanish class, we were partnered up together, and we had to come up with a skit introducing ourselves and what we like to do. In the middle of a conversation, he leans over, and I realize that he's about to kiss me, so I slap him across the face.

"What the hell!" He shouts, getting some people's attention from the class. The teacher wasn't there cause he had an errand to do.

"Y..you were about to kiss me." I said slowly scooting my chair away from him just in case he hits me back.

"Well..um...yah I was. Don't you want me?" He asked very cockily.

I've had enough. "WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT YOU?" I was starting to get more people's attention.

"Can you shut up, people are looking." He whispered.

"NO IM NOT GOING TO SHUT UP! YOU THINK I WOULD WANT YOU DESPITE EVERYTHING YOU'VE PUT ME THROUGH SO FAR THIS YEAR?! YOU THINK IM THAT FUCKING STUPID?!" I was so done. I packed all my stuff up and walked out. I didn't care if I was written up.

I'm supposed to meet up with Colby for lunch today so we can both walk over to where Sam and Jendell were having lunch, which was outside behind the bleachers. We didn't eat in the cafeteria anymore because something would always happen to me, and it would either leave in the nurses office or crying.

I had to go to the bathroom before lunch, so the halls were currently empty because people were in the cafeteria. As I was heading over to where Colby would usually wait for me, Justin comes out of nowhere and pushes me against a locker, my spine hurting from the impact.

"Leave me alone. I didn't do anything." I said blocking myself just in case he tried to hurt me.

"You didn't do anything??! You left me in class in embarrassment. And because of that, I'm getting what I want, cause I know you want it."

I was confused on what he ment by that until he started grinding himself on me. "What are you doing? Stop!" I said trying to get away, but he just pushed me harder into the locker.

I tried yelling for help but he covered my mouth before I could finish the word. "Shut the fuck up! No ones going to hear you so don't bother." He then started touching me. He put his hand on my neck and started kissing the side of my neck, so I bit his hand hard. He then yelled in pain and let go. I tried escaping, but he grabbed me from the back and threw me to the ground against the lockers. I screamed in pain, and he slapped me across the face. "Shut up you slut!" He then tried to lift me up, but I wouldn't let him. "Get the fuck up!"

I sat there and didn't move. Bad idea. He then kicked me in the stomach, and I groaned in pain. "I said get your fucking ass up now!!" I slowly tried to pick myself up, but I had no energy. He then picked me up by the neck and stood me up against the locker, his hands still on my neck.

"You listen to me, and you listen to me closely. Your going to do whatever I say. If you try to scream for help, I'll make it worse. I've wanted you for a long time, and I'm going to have you. So don't try to escape cause you're not going to. Understood?"

I was currently trying to get air to my lungs, so I didn't reply.

He squeezed even harder, and I could feel my face loosing its color. "Understood?!"

I managed to nod.

"Good." He let go and I almost fell on the ground because of the lack of energy, but he made sure to have me still standing. He began taking my clothes off, leaving me in only my bra and underwear. I was crying the whole time. I felt defenseless. I felt naked. I felt worthless. I wish i could fight, but had no energy to do so, and even if I did, I would lose of course because I was weak.

I saw him start taking off his pants so I closed my eyes, waiting for the pain to start. All of a sudden, I didn't feel his hands on me anymore, and I collapsed on the ground. I heard yells, but I didn't open my eyes because I was scared. I just curled myself in a ball and sobbed.

After a minute it was quiet and I felt a hand on me. I instinctively flinched away and curled myself even tighter. "Please don't. You can hurt me a...all you want, just please don't rape me." I whimpered.

"Sadie I would never do that to you. Open your eyes." the voice said.

I didn't open my eyes and I cried even harder.

"Sadie it's Colby. Please open your eyes. I won't hurt you."

Colby? I slowly opened my eyes and saw Colby squatted next to me, tears running down his face. "You're safe okay? He won't hurt you."

I looked over his shoulder and saw Justin laying on the floor unconscious, blood coming out of his nose, and bruises all over his face. I then glanced over at my clothes scattered on the floor of the hallway, and I remembered that I was almost naked, so I put my arms around me trying to cover myself.

Colby then looked over at the clothes and grabbed it, handing it to me, then turning away.

I took this as a sign to put my clothes back on. I tried putting my shirt on, but I couldn't cause my hands were shaking so much, and I couldn't find the energy to do so. "C...Colby?" I whispered, my voice barely audible.

"Yes? Are you okay?" He asked, almost turning around but catching himself.

"I...I need h..help."

He turned to me and saw the situation I was in. He quickly came over and helped me put my clothes on. He then helped me stand up, grabbing my stuff.

"Th...thanks." I said softly.

He nodded before hoisting me up on his back and leaving the school. He helped me into the back seat of his car, and I laid down across the seats. Tears were running down my face as he was driving, but I didn't utter a sound.

After, we reached his house, and I climbed out of the car onto his back. We went inside and he took me upstairs to his room. He then layed me on the bed, covering me with his blanket before sliding in next to me. I turned around and snuggled into him, while he wrapped his arms around me, and we both fell asleep.