87. Can't Live Without You// Thomas

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Thomas' POV

We were out in the Scorch, and it all happened so fast. We were on our way to the Right Arm and we were climbing through big, run down buildings. We got separated from the rest of the group, and (y/n) and I were being chased by a bunch of cranks. I couldn't save her in time.

We stood on a window that was about to break. It was close to the ground, but still far enough for someone to get hurt. And that's what happened.

We were fighting a crank on the cracking window and, instead of her, (y/n) pushed me off the window as she punched through the window and it broke. The crank fell along with the love of my life. She fell to the ground, and she hit pretty hard.

She saved my life, and I couldn't believe it.

She was still alive, but barely. She could barely move. She was bleeding all over and she was in so much pain.

I carried her the whole way. I didn't want to let her out of my sight.

Soon enough, we found the rest of the Gladers and we traveled the rest of the way until we found the Right Arm. We told them what happened and they agreed to help (y/n).

And now we're here. I sit with (y/n) in the Right Arm's medical tent. They gave her some sort of medicine, but I didn't think it was going to work. I just hoped.

She lays in front of me, laying on one of the beds they had. She rested, she needed it. She looked like she was in a lot of pain, more than I have ever felt in my whole life. I feel so guilty. It was all my fault. She pushed me out of the way to save me, and I couldn't save her in return. Now, she lays here as I watch her, thinking that I could've saved her, there could've been someway to save her. But I didn't. I couldn't save her.

(y/n), she doesn't deserve this and I let this happen. I didn't want her to leave me. She couldn't. I loved her so much, and I can't lose her.

"I'm so sorry, (y/n). This is all my fault. I love you. I told you everything was going to be okay, and I let you get hurt. I couldn't save you. I'm so sorry."

Just then, "Thomas," I heard (y/n) say.

"Hey. Hey, baby girl. How are you?" I asked her, but I knew the answer.

"I'm gonna die, aren't I?" She went right out and said it. When she did, a tear fell from my eye. I didn't want to think about that. And I hoped that it wouldn't happen.

"(y/n), don't say that. Don't say that 'cause we both know..." I couldn't finish when she stopped me. I cried for her as I held her hand in both of mine, bringing her hand up to my lips.

"Thomas, please," She said. I knew she couldn't take seeing me this way, but I can't take seeing her this way. Pain struck her entire body and the sadness in her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I just... I just can't lose you." I told her.

"I love you, Thomas. So much." She paused as I tried to stop her. I didn't want to hear the words she was about to say. 'Cause I knew they were just her way of saying goodbye.

"(y/n), please... Please, don't." I cried.

"Thomas, please. Just listen to me." She kept going, and I let her as I stared into her eyes, tears streaking my face. " I love you. Thank you for this extraordinary life you've given me. It hasn't been the best, but with you, nothing could be better. Thank you for this life and the life that was yet to be. I'm so proud of you and the life that you are yet to live. The life you are yet to find and create for you and the Gladers. Just remember, I am always with you, and I will always be with you. Never forget that. Always remember that I am her and that I love you, Thomas. Always have and always will." She told me. I believed every word, I just didn't want her to end like that.

Tears streamed from my eyes as I picked her up and set her in my lap, holding her dying body.

"No, no, (y/n). Please, you can't leave me. I promised you that you'd be okay. I promised you and all I can think about is how I didn't keep that promise. You're here right now, you're hurt because of me. I'm so sorry, (y/n). Just, please. Please, stay. Come back to me. I need you, I need you here with me. I can't live without you. Please, (y/n). Stay, stay with me. I love you so much, (y/n)." I cried out to her.

"Thank you, Thomas. I love you so much." Those were her last, dying words. Her last breath left her body, her heart stopped beating, the heart that I loved so much, the heart that my hand was covering. It stopped beating, and I knew she was gone as her body went limp in my arms.

"(y/n), please! Come back! I need you! Please, I love you so much! Come back to me! (y/n), please! (y/n)! I love you, (y/n)!" I screamed and cried for her, but I knew there was nothing I could do.

There was nothing else I could do. There was never anything I could do. And now, (y/n)'s gone. The girl I love, she's gone.

 The girl I love, she's gone

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