Stonehearts 4: Diamond

Thirty Five

A call from Bryce welcomed my morning the next day. I groggily reached for my phone to check the time and to answer the nagging ringtone.

"Bryce.." I huffed out couple with a yawn.

"I received a text from your doctor. Pina-expedite niya pala ang resulta mo. He says it's available now. Gusto mo na bang pumunta?"

I let silence fill in the space for a while before reality kicked me in the gut. I almost forgot I am sick. I groaned in agony, burying myself under the sheets. Ayoko nang bumangon. Darating din naman ang mga panahon na hindi na talaga ako makakabangon diba? I just wanted to die, para hindi na ako mahirapan.

I was pulled out of my depressing thoughts when a text from Ferris graced my phone.

"Hindi kita matawagan. I'm starting to get worried." It says.

I closed my eyes, trying not to give in to the prickly feeling of my tears.

"Aya?" Bryce called out again.

"O-oo sige."

"Okay, wait for me. Susunduin kita." Then I cut the line. I hurriedly looked for Ferris' number and gave him a ring. Mukhang inaabangan niya ang pagtawag ko dahil dalawang ring palang nasagot na.

"God! I was so worried." He exclaimed from the other line. I tried laughing but the sound came out so bitter that I even started to choke on it.

"Aya, sunshine. Are you sick?"

Yes, I am. "Hindi, kagigising ko lang kasi. My throat's a little dry." Palusot ko. 'Yong tibok ng puso ko paunti-unting bumibilis habang hinihintay ko ang sagot niya.

"If you say so." He faintly answered. I muffled my mouth to trap my sobs. "Anyway, mamayang tanghali pupuntahan kita." He oh-so-cheerfully said.

Napapikit ako. Hindi ko kayang pantayan ang saya ng boses niya. I wanted to see him too. Pero sa tuwing magkaharap kami, kinakain ako ng konsesiya ko. He deserves to know, I know. But I don't know why I find it hard to tell him that the life of the woman he swore love to is slowly fading away.

"Ah-eh kasi Ferris, may lakad kami ngayon ni Bryce. Nagpapasama siyang umm... ma-amili ng damit."

"Bumili ng damit?" He asked, evidently not happy with what I said.

"O-oo. M-may date kasi siya bukas. Mamayang tanghali kasi 'yon at naka-oo na ako. Pero p-pwede namang mamayang gabi ka dadaan dito, dito ka na rin maghapunan." I blabbered, dreading for his reply.

I bit my lip as the tension rise. Please say yes, please say yes. "Okay, sige. Hindi 'yan date ha, sasamahan mo lang siya." There was a hint of jealousy in his voice.

I chuckled, clearing my thoughts. "Yes po. I miss you boy sungit."

He laughed too before he let out a sigh. "And I love you my lil monster."

Alas-dyes na ako nasundo ni Bryce. Dumaan pa kasi siya sa trabaho niya para magpaalam na hindi siya papasok. Nahihiya na nga ako sa kanya. He was putting effort samantalang ako wala ng ibang inisip kundi ang sarili ko. Ni hindi ko nga magawang sabihin kila Mama ang pinapansan ko.

I really don't know what to do without Bryce, he's the only one keeping my sanity together.

"I wish you would live the end of our bargain Aya. Kapag nalaman na natin ang resulta sasabihin mo na kila Tita Judy, Tito Dante at Ferris. Mas matutulungan ka namin kapag ginawa mo 'yon." Sambit niya habang nagmamaneho.

Hindi ko nang nagawang sumagot, hindi ko rin kasi alam kung ano ang isasagot. How will I drop the news to the people I love? I cannot just barge in and say, 'Hey, I have Leukemia!" like it was a natural thing in the world.

I buried my face on my palms and started sobbing uncontrollably. I felt Bryce hushing me while we ran his hand up and down my back. What am I suppose to do now? Bakit parang pakiramdam ko ang unfair ng mundo sa akin?

Inangat ko ang ulo ko nang naramdaman kong huminto na si Bryce sa pagmamaneho. I looked around before I stopped to gaze at his unexplainable expression.

"Aya, whatever the results may be, please promise me that you won't easily give up. Please fight, for yourself and for the people who love you. Alam kong mahirap ang sitwasyon mo ngayon pero gagawin natin ang lahat, basta 'wag ka lang susuko."

I ogled at him, not knowing what to say. My mind blank and the words are harder to find. He sighed before shaking his head. Nauna siyang bumaba saka niya ako inalalayan.

The white walls, the stretchers, the chairs, the smell, even the ambience of the hospital channelled directly to my fears. Natatakot ako dahil alam ko magiging isa ako sa mga taong mamamalagi sa ospital. Mas lalo akong namutla nang may nakasalubong kaming babae na humahagulgol. Napahawaka ako ng mahigpit kay Bryce.

He pursed his lips before he faced me. "No, I don't want to hear whatever it is that you are thinking." He hardly pressed.

He can't blame me, simula nang sinabi sa akin ni doc ang sakit ko wala na akong ibang naisip kundi ilan na lang ang linggong natitira sa pamamalagi ko sa mundong ibabaw.

Humigpit ang hawak ni Bryce sa kamay ko nang huminto kami sa harap ng pinto kung nasaan si Doc Rivera. Muli akong nilingon ni Bryce saka inilagayn ang magkabilang kamay niya sa balikat ko.

"Deep breaths Aya." And I did what I was told. He kissed my forehead before he gripped my hand tight. We made our way inside, the doctor jerk his head up and was not surprise to see us again.

"I was waiting for you. Please have a sit para mapag-usapan na natin." The urgency in his voice added to my building pressure and fright. I felt like my heart wanted to lurch out of my chest as we watch him gather some files on one of his drawers.

He again sat in front of us. I can't seem to fathom the look on his face. Napatingin ako kay Bryce na mukhang kinakabahan din na parang ako.

The Doctor cleared his throat before he looked up and locked his gaze with mine. "I already talked to Doctor Fernandez, the oncologist, and arranged you if you want to start your chemotherapy the soonest. Mas maganda rin na mas maaga habang hindi pa kumakalat ang cancer cells sa ibang parte ng katawan mo."

I looked at him, ashen. Chemotherapy? Cancer Cells? Did I hear everything he said right?

Hindi ako nakapagsalita, Bryce immediately supplied the words I wasn't able to concretize. "D-doc what do you mean?"

The doctor flipped the pages of the paper he was holding and showed us a picture. It was round and purple-ish with little circles inside.

"This is your blood picture Miss Timbresa. You have Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, a cancer which is characterized by overproduction and accumulation of cancerous, immature white blood cells known as lymphoblasts." He explained will pointing to the round purple cells that has an opaque thing inside them.

Wala akong naintidihan sa mga sinabi niya. I was dumbly staring at him, no clue as to what he was stating.

"ALL only occurs 20-40% in adults and can be fatal if left untreated. It's a good thing that we have detected the disease at an early stage. Pwede pa nating agapan. Pero hindi ko sinasabi sa inyo para maging kampante kayo. Your cancer cells are fast multiplying and starting to cause damage and death by inhibiting the production of normal cells in your body. Chemotherapy is the initial treatment I suggest."

Chemotherapy. Simula nang nabanggit sa akin ni Doc iyon mas lalo kong napagtanto na may sakit nga ako. Muli akong nilingon ni Bryce ng nasa loob na kami ng sasakyan niya. Halos isang oras din namin kausap si doc.

Nagsimula nang pumatak ang mga luha ko saka ko naramdaman ang akap ng bestfriend ko. "It's not too late. Kailangan na nating sabihan sila Tita Judy at Tito Dante para masimulan na ang chemo mo. You'll be okay."