Stonehearts 4: Diamond

Twenty Six

           

Nakarinig kami ng kantyaw mula sa mga pinsan niya, naramdaman ko na lang ang pamumula ng pisngi ko kaya napatago ako sa gilid ni Ferris. Nairinig ko siyang tumawa ng mahina bago ako inakbayan at hinalikan sa tuktok ng ulo.

"Teka, bakit ka may pasa sa mukha kuya Ferris?" Tanong ng isa sa kanila. Napatingala ako para titigan siya, kinakabahan na sabihin niya na nagbugbugan sila ng bestfriend ko. "Wala 'to." Maikling sagot niya sabay kibit balikat. Iba si Ferris makipag-usap sa kanila, dahil sa tono ng boses niya wala na ulit nagtanong pa tungkol sa mga galos at pasa niya sa mukha. Normal nga niya talaga ang pagiging masungit.

He escorted me to one of the chairs near his grandma before he sat beside me. Saka niya ako pinaglagay ng makakakain, nakangiti pa nga siya habang naglalagay ng kanin sa plato ko. "Himala, ang mura ng ngiti mo ngayon Ferris." One of his cousins again noticed with amusement.

"Sometimes, you find the right reasons to smile." He muttered, clear and vivid before looking at me. I flushed crimson before darting my eyes down at the table. I heard them teasing him pero parang wala lang sa kanya.

Minsan natatakot na lang ako sa mga nangyayari sa aming dalawa ni Ferris. The limpid euphoria he makes me feel are out of this world. Kaya minsan naiisip ko nab aka may kapalit lahat ng sayang nararamdaman ko.

Pagkatapos naming kumain, isa-isa niyang pinakilala ang mga tito, tita at pinsan niya sa akin. Hindi ko nga natandaan lahat ang mga pangalan nila. Though sinabi naman niya na hindi ko kailangang tandaan, ang importante naman daw nakilala ko ang lola niya.

"Hayaan mo na sila diyan hija." Tugon ni miss Suzanna nang inakma kong tumulong sa pag-aayos ng hapag. Nagpaalam sandali si Ferris dahil kakausapin niya raw ang tito at daddy niya tungkol sa business. "Okay lang po Miss Suzanna. Wala rin naman po akong gagawin." Sagot ko sabay ngiti.

She smiled at me before looking away and staring at Ferris. I too looked at the man who has the ability to make me feel whirlwind of emotions. He was holding a red solo cup while seriously talking. Saka siya naalimpungatan at napalingon sa akin, ngumisi siya at kumaway bago ibinalik ang atensyon sa dalawang kausap niya.

"Alam mo bang ngayon lang ulit nagtagal ng ganito si Ferris dito? He usually leaves immediately when he visits, as if he can't stand being in the same area as us, specifically me." Biglang tugon ni Miss Suzanna. Natahimik ako at hindi nakasagot. I looked at her while she peered at Ferris with satisfaction. "He hates me, I know that. But to cut his emotional ties with his family because of me, 'yon ang hindi ko matanggap." I remained silent after hearing what she said. I saw tears residing from the corner of her eyes before she wiped them away. "I know his dad and I started in a wrong foot but I never thought that he'll resent me like this. He treats me well as an employee but never as his second mom."

Naalala ko tuloy ang mga sinabi sa'kin nila Deej saka ang mga kwento sa'kin ni Ferris. Alam kong ayaw niya kay Miss Suzanna pero not to the extent of avoiding her and his family like this. Si Ferris kasi, natural na masungit. Kapag gusto, gusto. Kapag ayaw, ayaw. "Gusto ko lang sana mag-thank you sa'yo. Sobrang thankful ako dahil hindi ka nag-give up sa kanya. I never knew I could see Ferris smile again and that's because of you. Hindi mo alam kung gaano namin katagal hindi nasilayan ang ngiti ng batang 'yon."

Naghihintay pa ako ng mga susunod na sasabihin ni Miss Suzanna nang may biglang humawak sa balikat ko. I turned around and saw Ferris standing behind me while glowering at Miss Suzanna. "Let's get you inside sunshine, umiinit na rito." Tahimik na tugon niya sabay hatak sa akin palayo.

We ended up in the kitchen. Pinagsasalanin niya ako ng tubig sa baso nang nagsimula siyang magsalita, "'Wag kang gaanong nakikipag-usap sa kanya. Baka pati ikaw ma-brainwash." His words were venom coated that it sent shivers all through my body. I held his hand and kissed it, like what he does with mine. That caught him in surprise but a gorgeous smile spread on his lips.

Idinantay ko sa mukha ko ang kamay niya bago nagsalita, "Let go of the hatred Ferris. You're not going to move on unless you stop clinging with the past."

He looked at me for awhile before shaking his head in firm dismissal, as if what I was saying was something impossible and undoable. "You don't understand Aya-"

"Then make me understand. I'm willing to listen." I exhorted pressingly. He sighed in defeat before he pulled one chair for me. "Sit down and I'll try to tell you everything." He muttered. I didn't let go of his hand. He googled at me intently, thinking very deeply before he looked around and started his story. "I was raised into believing that mom and dad lived a happy marriage despite the fact that they were arranged by their parents. Akala ko wala silang problema dalawa noon, 'yon pala magaling lang talaga silang magtago. Pasira na ang relasyon nila nang nakilala ni daddy si Suzanna. She became his secretary when he was still running the aviation. She was twenty years younger than my dad. They had an affair, hanggang sa nabuking ang hindi dapat. Mom got into a fatal heart attack which got her hospitalized for quite some time. But her body worsened overtime until she bid me farewell. I was very young then, only thirteen when I lost my mother." His tone became flat after the last word. He looked away, not wanting to meet my gaze. Nakaramdam ako ng awa sa batang Ferris na nawalan ng magulang sa murang edad. I tried imaging how he felt during those times and it breaks my heart little by little.

I enclosed his face in between my palms and gently turned his face to me. "You believed the things they wanted you to believe. Mahal na mahal mo lang talaga ang mommy mo, natural ang masaktan kapag nagmahal Ferris."

He looked down and started fidgeting his fingers. "They got married after a year of mom's death. Hindi ko naintindihan kung bakit ang bilis nag-move on ni dad. I was still mourning and he decided to remarry." Then he shook his head. "I never felt so alone then. Nawalan ako ng nanay, nawalan din ako ng tatay. My temerity against everything became my defense mechanism. Ayoko nang may lumalapit sa'kin dahil takot akong maiwan."

I cocked my head sideways when he raised his head to look at me. We stared into each other for a while, me getting lost to his deep enchanting eyes. "Natatakot ka pa rin ba ngayon?"

I heard him took in a sharp breath. Matagal siyang tumitig sa'kin bago tumango. "A little.....but I'm willing to gamble." He said with a smirk and my arrogant Ferris is back! I bit my lip to prevent the butterflies on consuming my whole body. Inakap niya ako ng mahigpit bago humalik sa tuktok ng ulo ko. "You're not leaving me aren't you?"

"Unless you tell me to then I won't." I sensed him smile. "But Ferris, please try to let go of the pain and grudge. Try giving Miss Suzanna a chance." He suddenly went stiff for awhile before relaxing. He released a long, audible breath together with his words. "I'll try...for you."

I shook my head before looking up at him. "Don't try it for me, try it for you. You've been living your life in destestation. I want you to be happy Ferris."

"I'm happy, never been so happy." He muttered with  a grin before trapping me again inside his embrace.