Trepidation | Sitkolson [ C ]

Chapter 28 | Stares

In History, I sat close to Ryan. I wasn't in front of him, but rather at the desk that was next to the one in front of him. I don't think I was even paying attention to whatever video the teacher was showing us.

It took everything in me to focus, but I just couldn't. I could feel Ryan's eyes on me. I tried not to look back at him, but it only grew harder with each passing second.

Slowly, I turned my head to him. My eyes locked with his.

His lips quirked, flashing me a smirk.

Blushing heavily, I whipped my head back to my empty page. I tapped my pen and tried to rid my mind of Ryan.

At first, I thought he would be hard to be with, but it's like he was a whole new person. There didn't seem to be a single ounce of anger in him. It was strange, but it also made my stomach flutter, too.

In those three days, I'd only spoken to Devin a few times. I still hadn't mentioned Ryan, which was probably the best thing to do. Devin wasn't even curious as to what happened between him and Chris. We spoke about the normal things.

Speaking of Chris, I hadn't seen he or Angelo since Friday. I couldn't blame Chris for not being at school and Angelo wanting to stay with Chris. I still didn't know what Angelo and Ryan even spoke about, but I think it had something to do with Ryan's behaviour.

He was wary, but more... loose. He seemed better, in an odd way. I liked it.

I guess I was too busy thinking of Ryan, because I didn't notice that the bell had rung until Ryan poked my cheek.

I playfully glared up at him. "Thanks."

He rolled his eyes and grabbed my bag for me.

Smiling, I took it from him and laced my fingers with his. "Yours?"

Ryan shrugged, his lips quirked slightly. "Depends what's on the table..."

I lightly shoved him, but my chuckle showed it was playful. "I have homework, and you have cars to fix."

Ryan didn't answer, but his smirk didn't leave. He had something up his sleeve...

I shook my head. "Come on."

| | |

As much as I tried to finish my homework and concentrate on the work, I couldn't. I later found myself watching Ryan do his work. Which proved to be more entertaining than I thought.

He was wearing the same dark blue jumpsuit he always was when he was working, but kept the top tied around his waist. His hands and white t-shirt were covered in black grease, and a few streaks were on his face from where he had rubbed it.

Ryan, somehow knowing I was watching him, smirked. "You're staring."

His tone was full of the smirk he wore, and it sounded as if he were teasing me.

He stepped away from the car he was leaning over and crossed his arms over his chest, an eyebrow raised with that same damn smirk.

Biting my lip, I looked back down at my work. I figured Ryan would go back to the car he was working on, so I looked back up, but he hadn't taken his eyes off of me.

"You're staring," I said, a smile sitting on my lips.

"Can you blame me?" He retorted, rather seriously, but was still smirking lightly.

I looked back down at my book, trying to cover my burning cheeks with my hair.

I didn't hear Ryan walking. It wasn't until I felt his hand on my cheek, pulling my face back up to meet his eyes, did I notice that he moved.

Not caring that he was probably smudging oil into my cheek, I looked into his eyes.

"You're a miracle," He breathed out, shaking his head.

I wanted to try and hide the blush that covered my cheeks again, but I didn't want to take my eyes off of Ryan's.

Because I was sitting down, and he was standing up, I simply covered his hand with my own and smiled.

Ryan mirrored my smile and grabbed my other hand. He slowly pulled me up from my seat.

I didn't expect it at first, but when Ryan leaned down and pressed his lips to mine, I didn't pull back. Instead, I let my lips move with his.

We both pulled away at the same time, our breaths just as quick and heavy.

Resting his forehead on mine, Ryan ran a hand through my hair.

It was quiet for a few seconds before I broke it, my voice a small mumble.

"What are we?"

Ryan bit his lip, probably thinking of an answer.

If I'm honest, in those three days, I found myself more attracted to Ryan than ever. There was this pull... He didn't have to try to get me to like him. He didn't have to try to do anything. All I needed was an answer for it.

"I've... Ive never, really..." Ryan trailed off, his eyes cast to the ground. "I've never had someone like you in my life... Ever."

I gently held his face within my hands and made sure he was looking at me before starting. "Neither have I. I mean, I've never had someone like you. Whatever we're bound to be, whatever we are now-"

Ryan cut me off by kissing me, though it was slower and shorter than the last one.

Pulling away, Ryan rested his hands on my cheeks. "I can't give you a definite answer. I... I can't. I just... I don't want it to be a one time thing. A-And..."

I bit my lip, trying to hold back a laugh. Watching Ryan fumble over his words somehow made me fall head over heels, if I wasn't already. He noticed my smile and blushed, which only made my smile turn into a grin.

"I get what you mean, Ry," I said. "I don't want it to be like that, either. We'll figure out the right word soon, though."

Though he was still blushing, Ryan reached down and laced our fingers together.

"Okay..."