April 16'

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Umbrella- Rihanna

"When the sun shines, we'll shine together

Told you I'd be here forever.

Said I'll always be a friend

Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end.

Now it's raining more than ever

Know that we'll still have each other.

You can stand under my umbrella.

You can stand under my umbrella."

No! I do not listen to Rihanna songs!

I just thought that the lyrics to this one quietly parallels with us. It makes perfect sense, doesn't it? Every word says exactly what I want to tell you, pretty much just every day. Just sayin'.

I admit (I'm a bit of a victim in the world wide system too) that I don't remember much about this month either. But I do remember thing or two.

I was clearing out my phone once, deleting conversations on my Whatsapp. I scrolled and made quite a few things vanish into thin air but I froze on your name.

"Muka <3"

How could I ever delete it, when I meant to keep it forever? I remember this one time when I accidently did. I fought hard to revive it.

So when I stopped at your name, I opened the conversation. I scrolled really hard to reach the top, because we had like 1,69,096 messages, give or take. Literally, the backup thingy showed me it.

When I reached the top, I was bemused for a second. You know why? Because I remember telling you it; more like sending a screenshot.

This was the month we realised that you hadn't really asked me anything at the starting of it all. You had said something.

"I'm a bad friend."

I remember you asking me why I had the screenshot.

I also remember sending you the screenshot of another conversation. Well, your message that said,

"You're my brother and I love you."

I've lost it. I've lost all those conversations. And yes that upsets me. But what makes me happy is that you gave me something that is gonna stay with me forever, and nobody can take it away from me. To make it cheesy, I'm gonna say your love. To not make it that cheesy, I'm gonna say the diary you gave me on your birthday. I'll keep it with me till eternity.

What I'm gonna talk about now doesn't really belongs to this month but I remember you telling me it once. So I'm just gonna slide it here because it will make the perfect sense.

Its crazy how you can attract the most beautiful things in life by being open minded, wholesome, happy but you can also attract the opposite.

Why did I say this? Because...

Once when you came home from your tuition and were feeling a bit too emotional. Okay first, I can really guess your mood from a text.

You didn't tell me what it was about. But then I asked you it. And I just remember your answer.

"It's my cloud of darkness. It is right over my head and it is raining."

I remember saying,

"I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour."

I hope you didn't take that as a joke because it wasn't. It's true; I'll be there with you on every step of the way. You're a part of my entity, here for infinity.

I promise to hold the umbrella over your head.

And if I can't, I'll be the umbrella.

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