My popular secret

Chapter 16- The other side

I feel terrible about what I did with Dylan last night.
Just a day earlier I had an amazing moment with Caleb, where I really felt it meant something. He did it because he liked me, and not because he just wanted sex.
I feel honestly awful about the whole thing.
Caleb obviously doesn't know and of course I will never be telling him, but if he ever found out I know things would never be the same between me and him. Not that it matters much anyway, lets be honest, no one wants a girlfriend who's soon going to be a dead girlfriend. Not that either of them know of
this of course.

I wanted to go and speak to Caleb today, but I'm still feeling pretty crap from last night and my parents have grounded me. Instead I've been trying to call him all day but he hasn't answered and I'm starting to get exteremly worried.
What if someone told him what I did with Dylan last night and now he won't talk to me?
Or maybe it's something even worse?

--

It turned out to be something worse... I got a call from Calebs mum a few minutes later. She was in complete histerics, and asked if I would come down to the hosptial with her and her husband because they know I'm really good friends with Caleb. Caleb collapsed at home this morning and got rushed to hosptial in an ambulance. They don't know exactly what's wrong but apparently he's really struggling to breathe and his vital signs aren't looking good.
I told me parents and my mum immediately agreed to take me up to the hosptial. We're receiving treatment at the same hospital so going back there when it's not for me is the weirdest feeling. I got up and got out of the house so Quickly I didn't even bother getting changed out of my baggy jumper, or put on a wig.

I don't know how to feel about this whole situation really, if Caleb turns out to be as sick as his parents said I'll be exteremly upset considering what's happened over the last few days. I now feel even more dreadful doing what I did with Dylan, I should have been stronger, I realise now nothing is going to get rid of my destined end to cancer. I don't want Caleb to find out. Ever. Especially when he's this Ill. I really think we could have something special, and I don't want to sabotage that.

I haven't said much to my mum along this car journey but she looks exteremly worried for me.
"You sure you're alright darling?"
"Well no, but I just want to get there and see that he's alright and then I'll be okay."
"Okay, well I'll let you go in on your own, I'll just wait outside and speak to Calebs parents or something."

Eventually we arrive and head straight up to the children's cancer ward where he got transferred to. I begin charging through the corridors but don't make it very far before I feel like collapsing myself. I suddenly stop and have to lean against a wall to balance myself and gain my breath back.
My mum soon realises and turns back around. "Bella what's up?"
"Nothing. I just can't walk that fast that's all. My legs got a bit too carried away."
"Can you walk, are you alright?" She grabs hold of my shoulder as I become a bit more wobbly.
"Yeah I'm fine." I say and stand up attempting to shake it off.

I begin walking down the corridor with my mum standing close next to me. I walk at a more sensible pace this time, but ahead of me things still seem blurry. My legs go suddenly weak and soon enough they collapse underneath me and the world turns black before I hit the ground.

--

"Bella! Bella! Wake up Bella, come on darling, wake up." I feel something cold being pressed against my forehead then suddenly I wake up whilst taking a big gasp of air.
I'm lying on the floor, I can tell due to the coldness of the tiles leaning against my skin. There's a few nurses, one of which I recognise.
"Tia?"
"Yes Bella it's me. What you doing on the floor then huh?" She says and gives me a big smile.
Tia is a nurse who I've known for my last few years of treatment. She's more like a friend than a nurse to me, and isn't as sympathetic as all the other nurses which is something I also like.
"I don't know. Did I faint?"
"Yes darling you just fainted." My mum says and tries to sit me up.
"Bella what are you doing here anyway?" Tia asks whilst helping my mum to sit me up.
"I'm here to see - my - my friend Caleb." I say still a bit out of breath "he was brought in here this morning. I need to see him."
"Oh yes Caleb. He's um -"
"How is he?"
"He's not too well I'm afraid."
"Well can someone just help me stand up so I can go speak to him?" I say starting to get frustrated with my pathetic muscles as I shuffle myself around unable to pull myself up.
"Of course, but I think we need to get you checked out first be-"
"I fainted. There's nothing unusual about it. Come on, just help me up please." Tia and the other two nurses, gently grasp my arms and one stands behind in attempt to pull me up. But as I get about half way me legs buckle again and I'm falling back to the floor. The nurse standing behind me catches me in time before I collide with the cold tiles again.
"Woah Bella, okay, lets sit you back down." Says Tia. "Sam can you get us a wheelchair pleas." She says to one of the other nurses quietely.
"Tia I don't need a wheelchair! I just want to see Caleb."
"Well we can't have you being dragged around the hosptial if you can't walk now can we?"
"But I can walk!" I say as I'm still sat on my bum looking silly as lots of patients, visitors and doctors continue walking around us all.
The main corridor leading towards the kids oncology ward wasn't the best place to faint.
Sam comes back with a wheelchair, and they all help me to sit in it.
"I came here for Caleb today not for me." I say upsettingly.
"I know but there's nothing we can do about it baby." Says my mum.
"Come on Bella, lets get you into an examination room."
"What wait no!" I squeal and use my feet to prevent them from pushing the wheelchair any further.
"You've just fainted Bella we need to check your vitals."
"It's not like I'm about to drop dead any minute though is it!!?? Can I please just go see Caleb first, then I promise I'll let you guys check me over?"
"Fiiiiiine. He's just through here." Says Tia reluctantly.