Help.

12

     "He what!?" Avi exclaimed standing up from his position on the couch. Mitch continued fidgeting with his fingers. His palm was still wrapped up, he still hadn't told Avi about that part yet.
     Kevin shook his head and covered half his face with his hands, "Im sorry Mitch."
     "It's okay. I stopped him but it scares me that it happened. Like what if I hadn't walked in the door yet? What if I stopped at the store like I was going to? I wouldn't have caught him and stopped him. I would've lost him." His voice cracked at the words.
      Avi came sat back down and rubbed his back. The rubbing came to a halt as he saw his hand. "What happened?" He asked and Mitch sighed.
      "When... Scott cut... h-himself... I ran over to take the glass shard away from him but he wouldn't loosen his grip on it... He didn't want me to take it and when I tried to it slipped and c-cut me. As soon as he realized what he did he dropped the shard and mentally checked out."
     Avi closed his eyes, "He could have serious hurt you." He said and Mitch nodded.
     "He didn't mean to..." he shook his head.
     "He still was so focused on hurting himself that he didn't think about the fact that it would hurt you both physically and emotionally." Avi said and he nodded.
"He said that he just wanted to sleep. He just wanted some relief. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to give him that." Tears ran down his cheeks, "I'm trying to help him but I don't know what to do. What if I can't do anything to help him and he just keeps falling further into this depression!?"
"I'm not helping him! Am I making it worse!? What if I'm not there next time!? What if I lose him and it's my fault! It's my fault he feels this way anyway! I should've helped him out of this. He shouldn't feel this way if he-"
"Mitch stop." Avi said quietly causing Mitch to stop and take a breath before looking at him, "None of this is your fault. When will you understand that? You tell Scott this all the time when he blames himself why can't you understand that it isn't your fault either."
"Well Alex's gone so it can't be his fault." Mitch said quietly but Kevin shook his head.
"You're wrong. Mitch it is his fault. Scott wouldn't have such a small self esteem, he wouldn't be in this crippling depression if Alex hadn't ever been in his life. You're the one saving him over and over again. Little by little."
"Thank you Kevin. I needed to hear that." Mitch said before put his head in his hands. "I just want everything to be okay again."
"I know, Mitch," Kevin said sitting down on the other side of him. "It will be okay again. I promise."
     Mitch nodded trying so hard to believe it but he couldn't. It didn't feel like anything was going to feel okay again. He left Kevin and Avi's house to go pick up Leah from school.
     As he entered the day care center to sign her out Leah came running up to him with a short brunette girl by her side.
     "Uncle Mitchie this is my best friend Katie." She introduced them and Mitch smiled big putting out his hand.
     The young girl smiled and wrapped her small fingers around his and shook obnoxiously. "Well hello Katie. It's very nice to meet you."
     "Katie's dad isn't around like my papa isn't either but she said her mommy found another daddy! Do you think that my daddy's gonna find another papa?" She asked innocently. Mitch bit his lip and kneeled down in front of her.
     "Your daddy will find someone better than Papa. Remember all the bad stuff Papa did? Well when Scott finds someone else, he won't ever treat your daddy like your Papa did. Does that makes sense?" He asked and she nodded before shaking her head.
     "You just talked about yourself. I just don't know why your not my dad." She said furrowing her eyebrows as if she was thinking very hard on the subject.
     "Yeah didn't you save him? From the bad Papa?" Katie spoke up and Mitch looked over at her before nodding.
     He stood back up, "cmon sweetie let's go home. You're daddy is waiting."
     "I don't want to go home!" She said a little louder and Mitch furrowed his eyebrows before kneeling down in front of her again.
     "Why don't you want to go home? Don't you want to see your daddy?" He asked and she pouted looking down.
     Her voice came in barely a whisper but Mitch still heard it loud and clear, "Not when he's like this." He knew exactly what she meant and he felt it too.
     "Cmon baby we'll talk about this in the car and we won't go home right away okay?" He asked and she nodded still pouting.
     He smiled and picked her up waving goodbye to Katie before leaving. They got into the car and it was silent. "He will get better. I promise." She sighed and looked out the window.
     "I miss when he smiled. I haven't seen that in forever." She said sadly and Mitch nodded feeling the tears well up in his eyes.
     He hadn't seen that in over a month since he came back from the beach. "Are you my new dad?" She asked after a few second of silence.
     "Baby, I don't know the answer to the question but I'm not leaving anytime soon so you can count on that." She nodded.
     "Good I don't think Daddy could do anything if you aren't there." She said and he nodded before starting the car.
     "Let's go home." He said and she pouted but didn't say anything. He had felt comfortable leaving Scott alone with Kirstie for the day while he went over the Avi and Kevin's.
     They got home and Leah didn't run to the house excitedly to see her dad. She just waited for Mitch to unbuckle her before she stepped out the car slowly.
     She grabbed Mitch's hand and let him lead her to the house. He frowned at her lack of excitement that she usually has. Before he opened the door he kneeled down in front of her.
     "Hey," he said brushing some hair out of her face, "he's going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay." He brought her inside and she walked slowly up the stairs to her bedroom.
     Mitch sighed throwing his keys on the counter. He assumed Scott and Kirstie were still out because of the lack of sound coming through the house. He walked up the stair to their bedroom and noticed the bathroom light was on.
     He went to go turn it off and jumped when he saw the blond standing there. "Scott!? I thought you were still out with Kirstie. You scared the shit out of me."
     Mitch chuckled walking into the bathroom slightly. "Sorry." He said but his voice sounded weird. Mitch looked down at Scott's hands and saw the empty pill bottle. His eyes widened and he grabbed the bottle to see what it was. His sleeping pills.
     "How many did you take!?" He asked and Scott shrugged his eyes droopy.
     "I don't know the whole bottle. It's already working. I finally feel like I can sleep." He said slurring his words and stumbling into Mitch slightly. Mitch caught him and brought him over to the bed tears rushing down his cheeks.
     He grabbed his phone and started dialing 911 when a hand grabbed his wrist. "Please let me go." He whispered before his eyes rolled in the back of his head.
     "Scott! Scott!" He yelled shaking him."No no no no please please no." He pressed call with his shaking hands.
     "911 what's your emergency?" A women's voice answered on the other line.
     "My... my- boyfriend took all his sleeping pills and he just passed out. I need and ambulance..." his voice was shaking along with his trembling body.
     "What's the address?" She asked and he spit out the address quickly. "Okay sir. There's a few things you can do for me. Can you do them."
     He nodded because he couldn't speak not caring that she couldn't see him, "I-I can."
     "Good good. We need to get the pills out as soon as possible. Yes the ambulance is only a couple mitutes away but he has the best chance if you do this." He nodded again, "I want you to take two of your fingers and put them to the back of his throat so he will throw up the pills do you understand."
     "Ye-yeah." He said shakily. He went to so that when he realized something. "He's not breathing." He started to panic. He turned Scott to the sighed and shoved his fingers down his throat. White foamy chunks erupted from his mouth and he collapsed back again but this time he was breathing heavily.
     Mitch sighed in relief, "he's breathing." He said breathlessly.
     "Good sir. The ambulance will be their shortly to examine him." The women said before hanging up. She was right he could already hear the sirens approaching. Mitch ran to Leah's room to see her watching tv silently.
     "Baby I want you to stay in here for me okay? I'll come get you in a few minutes okay?" He told her and she nodded before he closed her door behind him. The paramedics burst threw the door and looked around for any sign of distress.
     "He's up here!" Mitch called from up stairs. They followed him up and started immediately assessing Scott. Mitch stood behind making sure he wouldn't get in the way. He was silently sobbing as they checked his pulse.
     His mind flashed back to the night he found found Alex beating him. He was pulled from his thoughts when a paramedic was standing before him.
     "Some of the drug is still in his system. That's why he is sleeping deeply right now but the amount is nothing dangerous. You did the right thing by making him throw up it got all of the pills out so now we don't have to do a stomach pump." The medic said and Mitch nodded.
     "Thank you." He whispered and the medic nodded, "he may be a few drowsy for the next few days as his system clears the drug out of him. Do have anymore of these sleeping pills?" Mitch nodded and looked into the bathroom.
     "I suggest you throw them away or give them to me because they won't help him in small doses I assume because he took so many." Mitch nodded, "the large doses will take a tole on his body."
     Mitch went to the bathroom and grabbed all the prescription pills Scott had in his cabinet. "Take them all. I don't want them here." The medic nodded taking them.
     The left and Mitch started to clean up the grow up. He sobbed as he did so and moved Scott so that he could sleep comfortably. He covered him with blankets and sat next to him balling his eyes out.
     "I'm sorry." He sobbed, "I'm sorry I'm not helping you. I'm trying. I'm trying so hard but I can't make you happy and it's killing me. I'm so sorry that all of this happened to you. You didn't deserve it." He sobbed caressing his cheek with his thumb.
     "I love you Scott. I love you to much do you know that? Do I not tell you enough that I need you for you to believe it? I'm not giving up on you. I'm not going to leave. I... I just want you to be okay." He whispered wiping his eyes.
     He got up and left the room to go get Leah. He opened her bedroom door and she looked up with worried eyes. She got up and ran to him.
     "Uncle Mitchie! Why are you crying?? Is it because of what we talked about!? I'm sorry!" She exclaimed putting her arms around Mitch's neck.
     "No no sweetie. I'm okay. Just a little sad but I'm okay." He said picking her up. "Let's go eat din din. How does that sound?" He asked taking her down stairs.
     They are dinner and watching Dory for the thousandth time before he tucked her into her bed. He kissed her goodnight and went to their own room.
     Scott was still sleeping and Mitch sighed. He was happy to see that Scott was finally sleeping but he also hated the way it happened. He got ready for bed before climbing in and facing away from Scott.
     I guess he got what he wanted. Sleep.