I Wanna Be Free (Dolenzmith) (COMPLETE)

49

Micky woke up to strong arms around his waist and soft lips on his neck. He smiled and turned to face Michael.

The Angel returned his smile and pulled him closer. "Mornin' babe."

Micky scrunched up his nose. "Morning? When did I fall asleep yesterday?"

"Around three p.m. It's about eight now."

Micky's eyes widened. "Seventeen hours?!"

"Don't worry. You needed it."

Suddenly, everything from Micky's dream came rushing back to him. Tears filled his eyes.

"Babe?!" Michael sat up. "What's wrong?"

Micky couldn't tell Michael about his dream. Peter's words echoed in his mind, and Micky blurted out the first thing he could think of. "I had a dream about the gas station."

Well, it wasn't a complete lie.

Michael frowned. He rubbed Micky's back soothingly. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Micky looked down. He did want to talk about it, but he couldn't. That was the problem.

Then he suddenly remembered that today was, quite possibly, his last day with Michael. Peter said he would visit him sometime in his dream tonight to tell him where they were going to meet...Micky had no clue what he was planning, but he knew it couldn't be anything good.

So he kissed Michael.

Michael was surprised, but responded eagerly to the kiss. Things started to get a little heated and, before Micky knew it, both their shirts were off and he was in Michael's lap.

He pulled away as the flashbacks started.

"Micky? Babe, are you okay?"

"I...I-I..." Micky gulped. "I'm fine."

"You're clearly not, Mick. Tell me what's wrong."

Micky didn't want to, but Michael was staring at him with such loving eyes that he finally broke down. "It was Harry."

"What?"

"Um..." Micky looked down at his hands. Why the hell was he telling Michael this? "My first time. It was with my friend, Harry Nilsson. We were...kind of a thing, I guess, before he went to college."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," Micky whispered. "But...I didn't really want it."

"He raped you?!"

"No! I mean ye—maybe? Um, it's...complicated," Micky sighed again.

Michael sat back and stared at Micky with dark, brooding eyes. "Tell me."

"Um, well...we were dating for almost six months, but it was in secret cause, y'know...we were both guys. But he wanted sex and I...well um, my dad was from Italy and he was really religious and stuff. So every time Harry asked if we wanted to go to the next level, I would say no. Cause I didn't want to disappoint my dad...even though I was already gay and he would've flipped if he ever found out." Micky laughed bitterly.

Michael bit his lip, suddenly ashamed for being an Angel, but he nodded, encouraging Micky on.

"So one night Harry and I went to a party. It was pretty big, all the kids from school were there and stuff. And...I got pretty drunk. Harry and I were dancing and somehow...we ended up in a bedroom. He had a condom and I remember telling him yes, but I...I didn't want it, not really. I wasn't ready, but we...we ended up fucking anyway. But I said yes so I consented. It wasn't rape. Not really."

"Micky," Michael said quietly, "you were drunk. There's no way you could've known—"

"Yeah, but I remember saying yes. I remember it, Michael. I don't remember much else from that night, but that one thing...I said yes. And that's all that mattered to Harry. He broke up with me a few days later. Then we graduated not long after that."

Micky looked down and sniffled. Michael cupped his chin and made him look up. His heart broke at seeing his boy's eyes filled with tears again.

"It wasn't your fault, Micky. Please never think that it was. I'm sorry, I should've slowed us down before we got too heated."

Micky shook his head. He sniffled again. "No."

"No?"

"I...I don't want my experience with Harry to warp my opinion on sex for the rest of my life. I don't want him to control me like that. He's...already controlled me too much." Micky looked up, his eyelashes wet with tears.

"What are you saying, Micky?"

Micky leaned in and met Michael's lips in a kiss that was much more heated than before. They panted as they pulled away and Micky looked the Angel straight in the eye.

"I want you to make love to me, Michael."