LightWeight

Prologue

Everyone says life is unfair, and although that is very true, everything has a reason. Every day we wake up is a blessing and that blessing can easily be taken away if it is unappreciated. While everyday may not be good, and some might be viler then others, we have the power to make the next day better than our last.

“We have the power to make those that hurt us, motivate us.

We have the power to make those that hate us, envy us.

We have the power to change our lives for the better."

When someone we love hurts us, over and over and over, repeatedly we find reasons why. Explanations to explain their behavior. We love them so much we don't see the wrong in their eyes but the good in disguise. We cover the bruises with Band-Aids, but the scars never heal. Eventually, we realize the love we see is the hate they are revealing. We can try and help, but you can't help those who think their cruel actions are justifiable.

How do you justify abuse to a child?

How do you justify burning their self-esteem?

How do you justify constantly turning away the one person who wanted to help you when everyone else considered you a villain?

Maybe my heart was just too open. Maybe I cared too much. Maybe I loved too hard.  But it seems like the only people that hurt me are those I believed loved me.

"Bad things happen to good people."

"Only the good die young."

If that's the case, why am I still alive with these ugly scars on my heart? I lived through EVERY piece of trauma that happened to me, why?

Why live feeling unloved?

Why live feeling broken?

Why live feeling hopeless?

Because while you want to die, others are. The ones that love life are being taken from a family, a home, from Earth. Why give life to someone who doesn't appreciate it? Life is something you don't have to have. I mean, like Drake said, everyone dies but not everybody lives. Sure you have a beating heart and working brain. All your muscles operate and you're far from being a paraplegic, but no really appreciates things until its taken away from them.

So I live, and I learn.

So I live, and I motivate.

So I live, and I suffer.

So I live...with a broken heart.

So I live...with no hope for tomorrow.

So I live...bruised and scarred and not trusting.

So I live...with a guard I swear to never let down.

So I live...with tragic memories.

So I live...not letting anyone close enough in to see my shattered faith.

So I live...waiting for someone to fix my heart.

-DESIREE