Wings | ✓

3. a plan

greg was right. the new medication really did make me feel better and i didn't hear that voice anymore. it's my fourth day taking the new medication and i think it's really working because my spine doesn't ache as much and i could sit up to look at the glow-in-the-dark stars on the wall in front of my bed for a little while.

there hasn't been much going on lately because the medicine was working so well. the nurses only stop by to pass me my food and medicine and greg isn't due to check up on me till the weekend. and that made me really angry.

the nurses were my friends. but now they're neglecting me because i'm feeling better. and greg made me take the new medicine and he made me feel better.

luckily for me, i could actually read the labels on the bottles of medication and figure out exactly which one was for what problem i had. it's hard to identify which one was meant for my illness because they have strange scientific names that i can't pronounce and i don't actually know what's really wrong with me. but i do know morphine, the large white pill, is for relieving pain and melatonin, the small powdery white tablet, is meant to help me sleep better because that's what the nurses told me when i asked, so i've only been ingesting those two for the past two days. when i ask about the other medicine, they always tell me that it's all too complicated for me to understand, which is really nice of them, i suppose.

anyways, just taking the morphine and melatonin are much better than having to swallow such a huge concoction of pills, and since the nurses hardly check up on me, they don't realise anything is amiss. the little baggies of pills they pass to me every night are hidden under my bed, away from sight.

i honestly feel so much better because i'm numb all over from the medicine i do take. i don't see any difference other than the fact that i tire a little easier, but that's no big deal.

i just want to get back to my original condition from before so the nurses and greg can hang out with me more. it's not like i have very much to lose from getting a little worse. if i'm going to be stuck here until i die, it's not too bad, lying to them, right? i don't mean to be bad. i just want a friend.