Fresh Air (Jay Park) COMPLETED

Figuring it out

Jay's POV

It's been a few days since she told me the truth. She moved back in with me and we're both trying to wrap out heads around the fact that she won't be here for much longer. We talked about it all, after getting out of our systems first. I told her I don't care about it one bit and I want her near me for as long as possible. That made her cry again, she's a literal mess and I don't blame her. I try to imagine hearing I only have one year left on this earth and trying to live with that fact. It's like living with the sword of Damocles over my head, waiting for it to fall down and hit me. It's the worst feeling in the world, I get that. 

It's barely morning and Yeri is still asleep inside my arms. She won't let go of me, it's like this every morning. She has some of the worst nightmares I've ever seen. It makes me want to stay beside her at all times, especially when she sleep. I'm here for her when she needs me. She told me I'm the only thing in this world that can make her feel at ease. And I have to admit it makes me feel a little proud. Just imagine being the only person for someone, it makes your chest swell. Yeri stirs a little while turning around and putting her cheek over my heart. I let my fingers go through her hair and comfort her. Her hair has grown out a little since we first met, it's already reaching her shoulders and somehow she seems a little younger like this. She looks more fragile every single day. 

"Jay?" She whispers and I feel her hot breath against my cool skin. 

"Yes, baby?" I answer her and her eyes open a little. There's a smile already on her face when I say the word 'baby'. She loves it when I say it and I know it all too well. 

"Good morning", she says in a hoarse voice. There's something about her in the morning that breaks my heart. All her guards are down and there's this second she doesn't know about being ill. I can see her face change the second it hits her, it's always the same, every morning. I lean in for a kiss to make her forget about it just a little longer. She deserves to be carefree. Most people don't go through half the shit she's been through in her life. 

"Good morning", I say back after a long kiss. Her eyes open again and shoot me a look of endearment. It's good to know how we both feel about each other. There was a misunderstanding back in Seattle, but we talked about that. I believe her when she says she wasn't rude to the fans and I can't see any angry fans either. 

"So what's on the schedule today?" She asks me while getting up slowly. 

"First of all I need to talk to Hoody..." I say this with a big sigh. She purposely mislead me back in Seattle and we need to get the record straight before we can continue at the company. I've avoided all contact with my brothers at AOMG for the past few days. I basically just tried to enjoy the time I have with Yeri and nothing else. 

"And I need to go to work. I need to feel normal again somehow", she sighs too and tries to get up. I pull her back by her wrist. She collapses against my chest and looks up at me with expectant eyes. 

"Not before I let you", I say in a deep voice and kiss her again. This kiss is deeper and full of passion, whereas the last was just a wake up kiss. My hands grip her hips and tilt her on top of me while we kiss. If there's something I want to enjoy, it's every single inch of her for every morning, midday and evening. I will never get enough of her and since our time is limited we need to make the best of it. She moans into the kiss as my hands slide over her ass to squeeze them. Her hands are on my chest and rubbing up and down. Her touch is always so soft, it drives me crazy. This is how we spend every morning ever since she told me. 

Yeri's POV

I'm fully dressed and ready to go to work by the time Jay finishes his shower. He takes as long as a woman inside that bathroom, I swear. He's been the best boyfriend ever, he understands everything and tries to make me forget from time to time. If only I could. If only he could succeed in his intention, but it's too late for that. It's too late to not take this into mind. I always think about how our minutes are numbered, not even out of free will. It'll be way harder to say goodbye to him now. He's etched into my heart, mind and body. But there will be a moment when we'll be separated and he'll have to go on without me. I didn't tell him about the alternative treatment, because it's not certain that it can buy me any more time. After I recovered a little I went back to the doctor. He told me the whole story of that treatment, it's still experimental. It can cause me to feel sick most of the time and won't guarantee any changes. I'm not prepared to live my last year in sickness and pain. I'd rather live it in happiness and make sure to live.